Funny Backwards Sayings

#1. In the Catskills, nostalgia runs backwards. The upwardly mobile Jewish masses of the 1950s and 1960s have been replaced by the Jews of 19th century Poland.

Kevin Haworth

#2. On quiet nights, when I'm alone, I like to run our wedding video backwards, just to watch myself walk out of the church a free man.

Jim Davidson

#3. My greatest fear is failure.

Chris Zylka

#4. We have a duty to get to know one another, and to cultivate a concern and responsibility for all our neighbors in the global village.

Karen Armstrong

#5. I was going to France to do my masters and my Ph.D., but I didn't know how to say, 'bonjour.' You really feel like a baby, starting everything from scratch.

Zeresenay Alemseged

#6. I was going to tape some records onto a cassette, but I got the wires backwards. I erased the all of the records. When I returned them to my friend, he said, "Hey, these records are all blank."

Steven Wright

#7. The sky is falling. No, I'm tipping over backwards.

Steven Wright

#8. Having done television for almost 20 years now, a pilot is kind of like a rough draft. It's like bringing people into your ultrasound and hooking up to the monitor and going, "Isn't my baby beautiful?" "Yeah. I can only see the outline of it, but it looks like it might be."

Matt Bomer

#9. Happiness requires courage, stamina, persistence, fortitude, perseverance, bravery, boldness, valor, vigor, concentration, solidity, substance, backbone, grit, guts, moxie, nerve, pluck, resilience, spunk, tenacity, tolerance, will power, chutzpah, and a good thesaurus.

Peter McWilliams

#10. It's funny, how you realize things too late. Someone once said to me the tragedy about life is that you understand it backwards. But I don't think so. I think the tragedy about life is there is no tragedy - you just don't know it till you die."
- Patty Belle Bellani

Marianne Macdonald

#11. I wanted to get a tape recorder, but I got a parrot instead. I think I did that joke backwards.

Mitch Hedberg

#12. Do you know what happens when you play a country song backwards? You get your wife back, your dog back and your job back.

Richard Belzer

#13. Don't be scared to embrace the way that it hurts just to grow. You'll look back and your heart will thank you for not standing still when what you needed the most was to move forward

Hayley Williams

#14. Humans are aware of very little, it seems to me, the artificial brainy side of life, the worries and bills and the mechanisms of jobs, the doltish psychologies we've placed over our lives like a stencil. A dog keeps his life simple and unadorned.

Brad Watson

#15. It's funny because when you do become successful, you're forced to look backwards and try to crawl back into the womb where you first started to create.

Jack White

#16. The world is a funny paper read backwards. And that way it isn't so funny.

Tennessee Williams

#17. I never did that badly with women when I wasn't on telly, but it's a bit out of control now. Women try it on with me more than I'm comfortable with. It's strange, because I think I look like a troll wearing a woman's wig backwards.

Noel Fielding

#18. Assad whistled a few notes of one of his native country's melancholic songs. It sounded as though he was whistling backwards

Jussi Adler-Olsen

#19. We adore babies because they're so cute. And, of course, we are amused by jokes because they are funny. This is all backwards. It is. And Darwin shows us why.

Daniel Dennett

#20. If you have an idea of what you want to do in your future, you must go at it with almost monastic obsession, be it music, the ballet or just a basic degree. You have to go at it single-mindedly and let nothing get in your way

Henry Rollins

#21. Fear, tenderness - these emotions were so despised that they could be admitted into consciousness only at the cost of redefining what it meant to be a man.

Pat Barker

#22. To believe in a God means to see that the facts of the world are not the end of the matter.

Ludwig Wittgenstein

#23. I went to an all-girls Catholic high school. The three things that they focused on were reading, writing, and arithmetic. My goodness, this is a novel idea in this modern society. I was really good at all three of these things. I was particularly good at math.

Ursula Burns

#24. I had the cab driver drive me here backwards, and the dude owed me $27.50.

Mitch Hedberg

#25. If you see the light at the end
of the tunnel, you're looking
through binoculars the wrong
way

Josh Stern