Dark Joke Quotes

#1. Only the day before, Cockie's dark joke wouldn't have included me, but now it did. "Is love always such a mess, do you suppose?

Paula McLain

#2. I take a lot of pride in managing to be funny without having a victim at the end of my joke. I laugh at a really dark joke as much as the next person, but my jokes, I feel, don't have to hurt anybody to be really funny.

Ross Mathews

#3. Poles had a dark joke in 1944, about a bird which falls out of the sky into a cowpat, to be rescued by a cat; its moral, they said, was that Not everyone who gets you out of the shit is necessarily your friend.

Max Hastings

#4. We keep giggling, happy and nervous, tickled by an incomplete innocence. We both sense that some dark joke is being played on us, even if we can't quite grasp the punch line.

Karen Russell

#5. If you write a novel where war is nothing but hell and no one experiences excitement or cracks a dark joke, then you're not actually admitting the full experience.

Phil Klay

#6. For loving draws us more to things than knowing does, since good is found by going to the thing, whereas the true is found when the thing comes to us.

Thomas Aquinas

#7. Make it dark, make it grim, make it tough, but then, for the love of God, tell a joke.

Joss Whedon

#8. If Pac-Man had affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in dark rooms, munching pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.

Marcus Brigstocke

#9. Just hear me out. While you were napping, I was busy chatting up our allies. Didn't you know
your woman's a golden-tongued ambassador! My sisters always said I graduated from the shock-and-awe school of diplomacy, but joke 'em if they can't take a fuck, right?

Kresley Cole

#10. I'm not for women, frankly, in any job. I don't want any of them around. Thank God we don't have any in the Cabinet.

Richard M. Nixon

#11. Writing a first draft is like groping one's way into a dark room, or overhearing a faint conversation, or telling a joke whose punchline you've forgotten. As someone said, one writes mainly to rewrite, for rewriting and revising are how one's mind comes to inhabit the material fully.

Ted Solotaroff

#12. Marriage is not the beginning of the journey, nor the end - it is the journey.

Carew Papritz

#13. It's hard to see where we're going since it's now dark, and I wonder if in some ironic twist of fate, we'll soar over the cliff without even realizing it. Like the universe's final joke: you can't plan your death, even when you try.

Jasmine Warga

#14. I don't do plays without jokes anymore. I've retired from those plays. I think it's bad manners to invite people to sit in the dark for two and a half hours and not tell them the joke.

Bill Nighy

#15. Don't mourn me", he said. Because it was a joke, a sick joke and because - at the end - he needed a little dark humour to sustain him.

Stephen Lloyd Jones

#16. When bad things happen, I know you want to believe they are a joke, But sometimes life is scary and dark. That is why we must find the light.

Adventure Time

#17. Glamour is not self-conscious; it's not trying really hard. It's just expressing your own truth. I think that's what the essence of glamour really is - expressing your uniqueness.

Kevyn Aucoin

#18. And I won't get to see Hikari or Aimi again? How can that be fair? What have I done to deserve this?"-
"It's not what you've done, Sam. It's who you are. You are destined for greater things because of who you are.

Phillip W. Simpson

#19. The girl-next-door image is a sort of joke; for years, I couldn't get any roles other than as somebody dark.

Felicity Kendal

#20. One age is like another for the soul.

Robert Frost

#21. Most people don't understand what humor is. They think it's something lighthearted and cheerful. Like 'good humor.' But it isn't. It's looking into the darkness and spitting at it with a joke. Humor is dark. Humor is that we're all going to die.

B.G. Harlen

#22. You killed me." My voice was unsteady.

He held me close again. "I brought you back."

"Please tell me we only have to do that once."

He whispered against my ear, "I swear I won't kill you again. Cross my heart and hope to die." It was a bad joke

Catrina Burgess

#23. He drew in an answering breath, and she waited to hear the quip, the joke, the dab of levity for the most intense moment they'd ever shared. But he only dropped his head into the crook of her neck and laid his mouth over her leaping pulse as they found their unhurried rhythm in the dark.

Jessica Lemmon

#24. Why is he scared of the dark?"
I meant the words for a joke, but Shade nodded seriously. "Like all monsters. Because it reminds him of what he truly is".

Rosamund Hodge

#25. At a certain point talk about 'essence' and 'oneness' and the universal becomes more tautological than inquisitive.

Christopher Hitchens