Your First Baby Quotes

#1. When your first baby drops her pacifier, you sterilize it. When your second baby drops her pacifier, you tell the dog: 'Fetch!'

Bruce Lansky

#2. Have you had your first baby yet? I might have one myself, once they find a way for the man to carry it around the first nine months.

Joe Haldeman

#3. Why not have your first baby at sixty, when your husband is already dead and your career is over? Then you can really devote yourself to it.

Fran Lebowitz

#4. The age of your children is a key factor in how quickly you are served in a restaurant. We once had a waiter in Canada who said, "Could I get you your check?" and we answered, "How about the menu first?"

Erma Bombeck

#5. When you hold your baby in your arms the first time, and you think of all the things you can say and do to influence him, it's a tremendous responsibility. What you do with him can influence not only him, but everyone he meets and not for a day or a month or a year but for time and eternity.

Rose Kennedy

#6. Once your baby tree is in the ground, check it daily, because the first three years are critical. Remember that you are your tree's only friend in a hostile world.

Hope Jahren

#7. Please, don't be good. Please," I begged.
Rush let out a rugged breath, "Shit, baby. Stop it. I'm going to explode. I'll give you your release but when I finally bury myself inside you for the first time you won't be sprawled in the back of my car. You'll be in my bed.

Abbi Glines

#8. I think it is such a privilege to give a baby its first home inside your body. [After the pregnancy was over] I found myself massaging my stomach gently. I miss him being in my body
stretching, hiccupping even. It was a wonderful, deep, loving, fulfilling feeling.

Celine Dion

#9. For the first time in your conscious memory; for the first time in fact, since your were a baby; a single tear, full and warm, rolled down your right cheek and you fell into a very deep and entirely dreamless slumber.

Dave Sim

#10. When I was growing up, I was an '80s baby, so I remember the Sega Genesis and the first Nintendo. I grew up in a time when we first started playing video games on a computer screen. Now there are headsets and your body's the controller.

Mehcad Brooks

#11. Being a parent is a selfless adventure. The worldview of "Take care of yourself first" is no longer logical to a sane person if your baby wakes up hungry in the middle of the night.

Jim Gaffigan

#12. A baby's existence for the first three months is a one-way street. One person is doing all the work and the other is crying, sleeping and pooping. So the first moment when you're actually able to do something and they acknowledge your presence, that's a big deal. A very big deal.

Colin Hanks

#13. I object in the strongest possible terms to the fact that the instant we stumble over possibly the most important thing anybody's ever found anywhere ever, the first thing SC does is snap into Full-Scale Raving Paranoia mode and apply this M32 total-secrecy-or-we'll-pull-your-plugs-out-baby

Anonymous

#14. There are no words that can describe the euphoria you feel when your baby recognizes you for the first time and smiles.

Jared Padalecki

#15. One of the first things Catholic school taught me is that babies were born sinners. You sucked before you took your first breath.

Lizz Winstead

#16. Umm. Wow. Did it grow? Because it looks bigger."
"Kissin' your red-hot love flower made this stem grow big and hard just for you, baby doll."
AJ managed to meet his eyes. "Love flower?"
"Thought maybe you wanted some kinda sweet-talkin' love words first.

Lorelei James

#17. First, I blow a hole in your face; then I go back inside, and sleep like a baby ... I guarantee you.

Clint Eastwood

#18. Do not trade your birthright as a mother for some bauble of passing value. Let your first interest be in your home. The baby you hold in your arms will grow quickly as the sunrise and the sunset of the rushing days.

Gordon B. Hinckley

#19. The worst part of directing is always seeing the first assembly. It's devastating. It really is. It's like going into the delivery room and you can't wait to see your baby, and it's a crocodile.

David Ayer

#20. First you have your baby, which in and of itself is a stunning feat. I won't go into specifics, but ouch and no thank you.

Ellen DeGeneres

#21. The first time you hold your baby in your arms, I mean, a sense of strength and love washes over you. It washed over me and I never thought that possible.

Colin Farrell

#22. The feeling of your baby taking nourishment from your body for the first time is amazing, and it remains the most touching moment of my life.

Laura Schlessinger

#23. In a first pregnancy, you don't have a child yet, so you can nap and see movies and exercise. The notion of 'baby' is abstract. You look at the ultrasound and don't really understand that the creature you're seeing is soon going to be your roommate.

Kelli Williams

#24. Wish on everything. Pink cars are good, especially old ones. And stars of course, first stars and shooting stars. Planes will do if they are the first light in the sky and look like stars. Wish in tunnels, holding your breath and lifting your feet off the ground. Birthday candles. Baby teeth.

Francesca Lia Block

#25. I allow myself to not feel the need to be some sort of wonder woman. You can't do everything at once and tear your hair out when you miss your baby using a potty for the first time, although my son was obviously very sad that his mum was not there on his big day.

Catherine Zeta-Jones

#26. The first lady in my life, but now you're gone,
I learned through the years to keep carrying on.
Your picture brings me tears and memories,
The way things could be ... and they should be, but they're not.

Afrika Baby Bam

#27. You want to be my first, Shane?"
"No baby, I'm going to be your last

Christine Zolendz

#28. My first intervention is to say, when your baby is born, just don't jump on your kid at night," Cohen says, "Give your baby a chance to self-soothe, don't automatically respond, even from birth.

Pamela Druckerman

#29. Nothing, until the ground comes up to meet you, and you land in a jumble of pain and shattered bones; and the scream you didn't think you had in you scrapes your throat raw as you let it out - like the first, shocked breath of a baby newly born into a universe of suffering.

Aliette De Bodard

#30. When you hold your baby for the first time. All the pain in your life disappears. You'll sacrifice many things for your children, your family. It's hard to watch them make the wrong decisions.

Catherine Bybee

#31. Something terrible is happening to me, Mom," he said, his voice cracking. For the first time all morning, he felt close to tears. "Oh, baby," she said again. "Why couldn't you have gone somewhere else?" "Excuse me?" "I don't want to hear about any more of your problems.

Joe Hill

#32. Oh baby, I could have come, just like this. With your fuck-me thighs opened up wide for me on the door. Now?" He laughed darkly. "Nothing will satisfy me unless I taste all that heat first.

Tessa Bailey

#33. Then he said, "Always follow your first instinct about a person, baby girl, and you won't go wrong." At first I didn't understand what he meant. So I asked him. He just told to me to be careful of whom I trust. Make sure that the people you keep close to you are worthy of the trust you give them.

Sha Cole