Top 100 There'd Quotes
#1. If I had to just play 200 shows a year with the same set, there'd be a gun. In my mouth. With bullets in it.
Bob Schneider
#2. I always thought unicorns were made from sunshine and rainbows and good feelings. Like you just appeared one day in a field filled with flowers and a big fat sunbeam falling all around you. And there'd be butterflies or something. That sounded way pretty. And realistic for unicorn creation.
T.J. Klune
#3. There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all.
Robert Orben
#4. If more people recognized the difference between friendship and mere attraction, or how love must partake of both to prosper, I expect there'd be more happy people."
"And a lot fewer poems and plays," I said, laughing as I splashed about in the scented water.
Sherwood Smith
#5. If only the weather would improve, there'd be hope of some work, but every day brings rain.
Claude Monet
#6. There'd been months when hunger seemed to be the driving force in his life.
Kelley Armstrong
#7. What I'm doing is a natural wonder. If not, there'd be 150 people behind me on the wire.
Nik Wallenda
#8. There have been times when I felt suicidal and I would stop my head from going in that direction of negativity because I thought there'd be something I'd miss that was funny in the future. If there's a chance I'm going to laugh tomorrow then want to live to experience that.
Dave Navarro
#9. You know, radio was a really easy way to do the shows. You'd come in, do a read-through, there'd be a few rehearsals, then you'd come the night of the show and do it in front of the audience and then go home.
Harry Shearer
#10. I've noticed that, with many of the authors I like, I tend to think I would dislike them as human beings or that there'd be a healthy amount of debate if I ever did meet them.
Laura Marling
#11. Suspense is torture ... but delightful
or there'd be no gambling in the world.
Ada Leverson
#12. For modeling, I was always creating characters. I dress like a tomboy. So, when I'd go into a shoot, there'd be all these dresses, and I'd say to myself, 'Okay, this isn't me. It's somebody else. So, who is this person?' Acting is the next level of that.
Agyness Deyn
#13. If a man couldn't affect the emotions you do possess - and you do have them - there'd be as much delight in such a union as there is in your relationship with the feed store owner." "What
Melissa Jagears
#14. We drove on and on, past little villages and both good things and bad things were happening to the people in those villages too, but I still was nothing but arms and ears and eyes and maybe there'd be either some good luck for me or more death tomorrow.
Charles Bukowski
#15. I grew up expecting to see the first man land on the moon. It never occurred to me that I'd see the last one. We thought there'd be a moon base.
Terry Pratchett
#16. Laws on killing, even God's demands, didn't allow for peace. Not always. There'd still be pain; missing that child would break her parents' hearts. But what Helen knew, what she'd seen in those woods, would be too much for them, for everybody.
Alan Heathcock
#17. Love was really a high priority. You could drive up this road and there'd be open doors. You could actually walk in as a stranger and they'd invite you for a meal.
Linda Perhacs
#18. As we'd slogged away for weeks on the Convention Hall stage in isolation, trying to pump life into our much-vaunted songbook, there'd been only one thing missing: you.
Bruce Springsteen
#19. A person is like a novel: Up to the very last page you don't know how it's going to end. Otherwise, there'd be no point in reading ...
Yevgeny Zamyatin
#20. Hundreds of years ago during the Unity, there'd been a selection to choose those who'd take shelter in the pods and those who wouldn't. It had divided their ancestors and his, but she couldn't let that happen again. How could she value one person's life over another?
Veronica Rossi
#21. If this place were closer to Terra there'd be empty beer cans and plastic plates strewn around. The trees would be gone. There'd be old jet motors in the water. The beaches would stink to high heaven. Terran Development would have a couple of million little plastic houses set up everywhere.
Philip K. Dick
#22. I'm sorry ... " She shrugs, glancing back at him. "Gotta admit he's hot, though, Livie. He looks like a Mediterranean underwear model. There'd be no coyote-ugly situation in the morning there.
K.A. Tucker
#23. someday there'd be a way, maybe ice, maybe some other way, to get a peach like this here I got in my hand clear to Philadelphia.
John Steinbeck
#24. We can't just have everything without complications, you and I. There'd be no story without complications. With nothing to overcome, we'd die unstoried deaths.
Adam Levin
#25. When I was in the business as a young performer, it was a recognised fact that when you got to 60 you were out, because there'd be a new crop of comics coming up all the time, every 10 years or so.
Bruce Forsyth
#26. I wonder what happened to 'em all?"
"You," said the horse.
"Well, yes. But I always thought there'd be some more.
Terry Pratchett
#27. If everyone demanded peace instead of another television set, then there'd be peace.
John Lennon
#28. I guess I'll have to change my plan I should have realized there'd be another man Why did I buy those blue pyjamas Before the big affair began? I guess I'll have to change my plan.
Howard Dietz
#29. As Deb Lemire, president of the Association for Size Diversity and Health, says, If shame worked, there'd be no fat people.
Kelly McGonigal
#30. There is no place so benighted and godforsaken that some moron won't go there on vacation. People could be living in an open sewer and swallowing dirt to stop the hunger, and there'd be a couple from Larchmont wearing comfortable shoes there to take pictures of them.
Thomas Perry
#31. My feet crunched over dry hickory leaves. Wood rangers had stapled up Smokey Bear ("Only You Can Prevent Forest Fires!") signs along the state roads. One cigarette butt flicked out a passing car window and there'd be real hell to pay.
Ed Lynskey
#32. If being a gangster were a prerequisite to being a musician, there'd be a lot less cello music, for example.
Greg Giraldo
#33. I had no idea there'd be so many Sherpas aboard!" exclaimed Miss Simpkins.
"I'm not a Sherpa," Nadira said. "I'm a gypsy."
"Oh, my goodness!" said the chaperone.
Kenneth Oppel
#34. When I'm sometimes asked when will there be enough [women on the Supreme Court] and I say, 'When there are nine,' people are shocked. But there'd been nine men, and nobody's ever raised a question about that.
Ruth Bader Ginsburg
#35. If love were orange, like an apple, there'd be nothing to compare it to.
Jarod Kintz
#36. Stop-motion is sort of twitchy; you can feel the life in it. If we were to remove that completely, there'd be no point in it.
Henry Selick
#37. I got both hands on her throat and there was nothing inside me but the black madness of that desire to kill her, to close my hands until she turned purple and lay still and there'd be an end to her forever. Let them send me to the chair. Let 'em burn me. All they could do was kill me.
Charles Williams
#38. Are you asking if I believe in ghosts?"
"I don't know. Maybe. Yes."
"Of course not. Imagine how many there'd be."
"Yes," Kirsten said, "that's exactly it.
Emily St. John Mandel
#39. Maisie was willing to bet there'd be a third living room within. Because what else would they do with all this space but buy sofas to fill it?
Erin Kellison
#40. If there'd been an astronaut on the moon right then, I'm sure I could have seen him. Perhaps he could have looked down and seen me too ... the only one who could.
Lucy Christopher
#41. Everyone knew the meaning of a thing didn't emerge until there'd been an ending and you could finally see how all the parts worked together.
Kathryn Davis
#42. Oh my God. I just got dumped by a red headed mortician in a funeral home named Crummy's, after pretending to be a circus freak at a visitation I had just crashed. I was pretty sure there'd be no bouncing back from this. -Dakota Bombay
Leslie Langtry
#43. Why would a god sacrifice her life if she was God? Just show real power and send an army of angels and there'd be no debate.
Peter Tieryas
#44. In little pockets of conversation, old men were telling stories of ancient floods. Women were talking of about how much rain there'd been in other towns
Paragould, Lepanto, and Manila.
John Grisham
#45. If I were to die of anything vaguely sex-related or had taken Viagra, you just know there'd be headlines of 'Russell How-hard' in the newspapers.
Russell Howard
#46. And you know, we'd go to church. We were Baptists. And every now and then there'd be a tent would set up, and it was the Holiness folks. And we liked their music.
Mel Tillis
#47. Smart people only mated with smart people, class structures would ossify. There'd be a permanent underclass of stupid people.
Adelle Waldman
#48. There'd never been any closure. There hadn't even been good-byes.
Andrea Kane
#49. Because there'd be two languages I couldn't speak, French and English.
Casey Stengel
#50. If women could sleep their way to the top, there'd be a lot more women at the top.
Gloria Steinem
#51. There'd been rules agreed upon for these particular types of torment sessions. I was rarely restrained, but I was to remain absolutely still. I was to keep my arms and legs where he'd placed them, or where I'd laid them when the session began.
Joseph Lance Tonlet
#52. There'd never been anyone who could knife him so with a momentary word, and then speak the wound away in the very next moment. If all those little boyhood heartbreaks had been supposed to make him ready for this, Demane wasn't.
Kai Ashante Wilson
#53. Their dance with the Grim Reaper had arrived. After tonight, there'd be no turning back. opening of GUT-CHECK GREEN
Peter Prasad
#54. Even if Matt loved me for the rest of his life, and never so much as blinked in the direction of another woman, there'd still be pain in our past. Fear that we might let each other down again.
Aimee L. Salter
#55. Snakes don't have fuckin' legs, so how was I supposed to think there'd be one hidin' in the face of a damn rock that's ten feet below the summit?
Simone Elkeles
#56. Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall, ninety-nine bottles of beer... If one of those bottles should happen to fall, there'd be how many bottles of beer on the wall?
Lesley Kagen
#57. Many times I felt like I'd do better than what the director did, but some of them got a little discouraged because they didn't have full charge of making the film, and sometimes there'd be battles of egos.
Ray Harryhausen
#58. That's what I imagined, a giant game park with comfortable lodges and roads. At a minimum, roads. According to the website, there'd be "bush camping" involved, but I pictured lovely big tents with showers and flush toilets. I didn't think I'd be paying for the privilege of squatting in the bushes.
Tess Gerritsen
#59. I was worried that there'd be emotional spillage, maybe even some tears, and comforting strangers always made me feel like a pervert.
Alexandra Kleeman
#60. Do you know that's where the word comes from? Hangover? Historically, when there was a hanging, there'd also be a big street party, everyone boozing it up. Then the next day, when the hanging was over, they'd all feel like a steaming pile of shit, hence the now commonly used term.
L. H. Cosway
#61. I'm so pucked. There'd better be a support group for hockey hookers.
Helena Hunting
#62. Why do you gotta be going somewhere? Seems like it should be enough that we had nachos. And we got meaningful jobs. We catch bad guys. If it wasn't for us, there'd be vampires and all kinds of shit running around loose.
Janet Evanovich
#63. He'd won. There'd be dragons again. And a king again. Not like the old kings. A king who would do what he was told.
Terry Pratchett
#64. I checked to see if there'd been a really good book published in the last few decades. Then I started with what Cleopatra would have read, asking myself, 'What can we know about her education?' It turns out to be a very great deal, and bizarrely, no one had written about that before.
Stacy Schiff
#65. If you could see for yourself then there'd be no need to lend an ear to what others said.
Koushun Takami
#66. If my life were a movie ... the title sequence would start out like a typical high school story, but then reveal that something's amiss. There'd be a tight shot, or piece of dialogue, or something that would make the viewer uncomfortable. Something to give them that prickly feeling.
-Dez
Dawn Klehr
#67. Do you think there'd be a Givenchy in the hood if it wasn't for that South Park photo?
Kanye West
#68. If I had a hammer, there'd be no more folksingers.
Billy Connolly
#69. It doesn't seem real," said Linda. "None of this. It's like we're all dreaming or something. Or maybe we really are dead."
"Nah," said Patsy, fluffing her bleach-blond curls. "If this was heaven there'd be more naked men.
Michele Bardsley
#70. Sometimes she wished she could eat herself. She'd swallow everything - her soiled blue dress, the shackles on her wrists, her puffy face. If she could eat herself up, there'd be no trace left of her or the mistakes she had made.
Marie Rutkoski
#71. There'd be a lot less scandal if people didn't idealize sin and pose as sinners.
G.K. Chesterton
#72. 505If nothing ever changed,
there'd be no such thing as butterflies.
Wendy Mass
#73. What I want to do and what I do are two separate things. If we all went around doing what we wanted all the time, there'd be chaos.
Simon Birch
#74. We're not the greatest thing in the universe, certainly not the smartest. Seems logical there'd be a great many things in it we can't comprehend.
Sylvain Neuvel
#76. If you took away everything in the world that had to be invented, there'd be nothing left except a lot of people getting rained on.
Tom Stoppard
#77. Without faith, there'd be nothing but indifferent material forces at work. It's only when the idea of events having an author is introduced that the universe becomes cruel, as opposed to merely heavy, or fast-moving, or prone to unpredictable acceleration.
Francis Spufford
#78. I don't think there'd be a Tina Fey now if I hadn't tried to look good in the beginning.
Joan Rivers
#79. maybe if everyone appreciated good whiskey, pretty girls and breathing a little bit more, there'd be fewer suckers out there willing to fight and die in the petty wars begun by the sharp, the mendacious and the wicked.
Jason Sheehan
#80. I think there'd be huge losses if there weren't newspapers. I know everything's shifting to the Internet and some people would say, 'News is news, what you're talking about is a change of consumption, not the product that's out there.' But I think there is a change.
Michael Connelly
#81. You could name practically any problem in the hood and there'd be a rap song for you.
Jay-Z
#82. Sometimes you have to suffer a little bit in your youth to motivate yourself to succeed in later life. If Bill Gates had got laid in high school, do you think there'd be a Microsoft?
Greg Giraldo
#83. If only people could communicate mind-to-mind, eliminating the ambiguities of language, then understanding would be perfect and there'd be no more needless conflicts.
Orson Scott Card
#85. My mother had never openly protested my relationship with Sydney. Really, there'd been no chance. I'd simply shown up at Court with a bride in tow, and no one had been able to put asunder those whom the state of Nevada had brought together.
Richelle Mead
#86. Without the Fender bass, there'd be no rock n' roll or no Motown. The electric guitar had been waiting 'round since 1939 for a nice partner to come along. It became an electric rhythm section, and that changed everything.
Quincy Jones
#87. The only thing wrong with me was that I was a weirdo that hated school. I'm sure now there'd be a disorder for it, but I was just an oddball.
Eugene Mirman
#89. In a world like that, there'd be no need for love anymore either. if everyone were perfect, there would be no need to look out for others. Sympathy or Love is needed because people are imperfect. A perfect human cannot love anyone.
Tamiki Wakaki
#90. Gambling is so pervasive in Nevada that maybe the state should just go the whole hog. There'd be gum machines that dispensed chewing tobacco if you lost. You could gamble for the toilet paper in public bathroom stalls. And fill out Keno cards in an attempt to win cancer therapy at the hospital.
P. J. O'Rourke
#91. We'd boil this whisky because we thought that would make it stronger. So we thought we were getting drunk, but in fact there'd be no alcohol left in it.
Neneh Cherry
#92. I'd never been one to break rules. But they seemed to matter less and less with every kiss. Every thrust into her softness. Every sigh she moaned into my ear. Of course, that wasn't the case. I knew there'd be serious repercussions if the truth came out, but I couldn't stay away from her.
Sha Renee
#93. If the media didn't know I played chess, there'd be no angle on me at all.
Lennox Lewis
#94. If it wasn't for race mixing, there'd be no video girls.
Kanye West
#95. OF COURSE, SPACE travel isn't only about being stuffed into a claustrophobia-inducing cell, scared witless, trussed up in a restraint harness, and raped through every orifice for years on end. Because, you know, if that was all there was to it, there'd be a queue outside every travel agent.
Charles Stross
#97. If people understood how the economic system works, there'd be a revolution in a minute.
Henry Ford
#98. As a species we're pathetic in that way: imperfectly monogamous. If we could only pair-bond for life, like gibbons, or else opt for total guilt-free promiscuity, there'd be no more sexual torment.
Margaret Atwood
#99. If it were left to men, there'd be nothing in the world but mating and squabbling.
Judith Tarr
#100. If there were more "Planned Parenthoods," there'd be fewer abortions.
T. Rafael Cimino
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