Thats Like Saying Funny Quotes

#1. How funny your name would be if you could follow it back to where the first person thought of saying it, naming himself that, or maybe some other persons thought of it and named that person. It would be like following a river to its source, which would be impossible. Rivers have no source.

John Ashbery

#2. Nothing makes you think you might need years of therapy like saying the word breasts in front of your mother.

Katie McGarry

#3. I'm not saying he was, like, crying tears of man pain over the phone, but he sounded upset.

Hannah Harrington

#4. No matter how much makeup I wore, people just kept saying "Yes, sir! Would you like tea with that, sir?" "Yes, I would like tea. Why don't you put it on my breasts?" "Certainly. Tea for this man's breasts! Anything else, sir?"

Eddie Izzard

#5. I dress like an old woman in my real life. If you're having conversations with people, you don't want them to remember you as the girl with the tits, You want them to pay attention to what you're saying

Jennifer Lawrence

#6. It's funny, I lived my first 38 years of my life with maybe one or two people ever saying that I looked like Greg Kinnear. As soon as I get into the entertainment industry, now it's 100 percent of people.

Greg Poehler

#7. Whew," he said. "You clean up good. You don't look like the same girl."
She frowned right before she laughed. "Do women usually thank you for saying things like that?

Robyn Carr

#8. Lotto fever hit New York again this week, and like the old saying goes, 'You gotta be in it to win it' ... but first, you gotta have a dead end job so pathetic you're willing to kill five hours standing in line for a 1 in 25 million chance.

Dennis Miller

#9. I should like to knock their silly heads together. What is the sense of laughing all the time? They are not saying anything funny.

Agatha Christie

#10. He would have shaved the centaurs, dipped them in honey, covered them with feathers, and hung them up like a bunch of pinatas. I'm just saying. - Warren

Brandon Mull

#11. Fine's a funny word, don't you think? I don't think there's another like it in the English language that says so much while actually saying so little.

Emma Chase

#12. Saying women aren't funny is now like saying Asians can't drive or saying black people have bad credit. It's just really, like, so obsolete.

Whitney Cummings

#13. It's funny how when you say "yes" to something (like the man of your dreams), you don't think about the fact that you are also saying "no" to something else.

Amy E. Spiegel

#14. Chalk again?" Cal seemed almost disappointed. "Too bad there's no chalk monster."
Penn snorted with amusement. Chalk monster. That was like saying it was a vampire. Everyone knew vampires didn't exist. Zombies who drank blood to stay alive. Ridiculous.

R. Cooper

#15. Mmmm ... the comedy that matters is the comedy you pull out of thin air. It's a bit like when something funny has happened and you try to explain it to someone else and end up saying, 'You had to be there.'

Jack Dee