Sayings About A Ham Sandwich

#1. I'm an appalling cook. I can just about create a glass of orange juice and a ham-and-cheese sandwich.

Dara O Briain

#2. God turns clouds inside out to make fluffy beds for the dogs in Dog Heaven, and when they are tired from running and barking and eating ham-sandwich biscuits, the dogs find a cloud bed for sleeping. God watches over each one of them. And there are no bad dreams.

Cynthia Rylant

#3. Normally a grand jury will indict a ham sandwich if a prosecutor asks it to.

Chuck Robb

#4. I will count to 10 before tweeting.

Valerie Trierweiler

#5. Regarding jam sessions: Jazz musicians are the only workers I can think of who are willing to put in a full shift for pay and then go somewhere else and continue to work for free.

George Carlin

#6. A ham sandwich is better than nothing. Nothing is better than eternal happiness. So eternal happiness is beaten by a ham sandwich.

Mark Forsyth

#7. Life is like a rape. If we cannot resist it, split the legs and enjoy it.

Aaron Lee

#8. Writing is a never ending journey for me - not only for my own comfort, but as a strong medium for encouraging a healthy process of constructive thinking among my readers

Debalina Haldar

#9. A real program of social and economic reform [in Vietnam] would have involved a real conflict ... between the peasants ... and the landlords and the city people ... [it] was difficult ... because it required a concern for the peasants ... it was those capacities ... its American supporters lacked.

Frances FitzGerald

#10. Clearly a black man's life is not worth a ham sandwich,

Michael Steele

#11. If you had a daily printout from the brain of an average twenty-four-year-old male, it would probably go like this: sex, need coffee, sex, traffic, sex, sex, what an asshole, sex, ham sandwich, sex, sex, etc

Kate White

#12. I watched my friend Eleanor give birth," she said. "Once you've seen a child born, you realize a baby's not much more than a reconstituted ham and cheese sandwich. Just a little anagram of you and what you've been eating for nine months.

Lorrie Moore

#13. How is error possible in mathematics?

Henri Poincare

#14. I tended to be a solitary young girl, and I still am. I would like to find a quiet corner and color in my coloring book. When I think back, I made that corner mine, not really caring about the rest of the house.

Evangeline Lilly

#15. If I practised sex, out of moral conviction, that was one thing; but to enjoy it ... seemed a defeat.

Martha Gellhorn

#16. We are being fired upon."

"By what?"

"A ham sandwich.

Sabrina Zbasnik

#17. I know all the swear words. I just don't use them. There are worse things in life than being called a Lady.

Irene Dunne

#18. I would love a sandwich,' said Tybalt, with enough gravity to make it sound like a formal proclamation. Resolved: that we will have ham and cheese sandwiches.

Seanan McGuire

#19. And then I had my greatest stroke of genius since that ham sandwich with pickles that time.

Elizabeth Bear

#20. I think all good reporting is the same thing - the best attainable version of the truth.

Carl Bernstein

#21. I want my kisses to haunt his dreams. I want him to beg for me. Seriously, the next time he tries to kiss me, I'm going to turn the other way. I want him down on his knees begging, Please, Boots, please!

Jillian Dodd

#22. And yes. I'd totally just compared the only guy I'd ever felt this way about to a ham sandwich.

Jenna Evans Welch

#23. Call me All-American, but I love Ham and Cheese sandwiches. And not just any old ham and cheese sandwich ... My mother's is the best. I've tried many times to make these sandwiches on my own, but it's never the same.

Andy Roddick

#24. A grand jury would 'indict a ham sandwich,' if that's what you wanted.

Sol Wachtler

#25. Here Sidney sat, with the ham sandwich and flask of tea that Mrs Maguire had prepared, and let thoughts come to him. It was a form of prayer, he decided. It was not asking or talking but waiting and listening. The

James Runcie