Dara O Briain Quotes

#1. I'm an appalling cook. I can just about create a glass of orange juice and a ham-and-cheese sandwich.

Dara O Briain

#2. I'm sorry, 'herbal medicine', "Oh, herbal medicine's been around for thousands of years!" Indeed it has, and then we tested it all, and the stuff that worked became 'medicine'. And the rest of it is just a nice bowl of soup and some potpourri, so knock yourselves out.

Dara O Briain

#3. I think the English are bipolar. 'We're the greatest, no we're terrible' - that's a constant English struggle. Crime is down, there's little poverty - yet it's always the worst time to have lived here.

Dara O Briain

#4. If we were truly created by God, why do we occasionally bite the insides of our mouths?

Dara O Briain

#5. On getting mugged: I carry around months and months of receipts. I need a mugger who can file my VAT returns.

Dara O Briain

#6. My iPod holds 3,000 albums. I own, like, 90 albums. My iPod sits at home, sullen, frustrated, and underused, like a wife who gave up her career and the kids turned out to be shite.

Dara O Briain

#7. Nostalgia is heroin for old people.

Dara O Briain

#8. Science knows it doesn't know everything; otherwise, it'd stop. But just because science doesn't know everything doesn't mean you can fill in the gaps with whatever fairy tale most appeals to you.

Dara O Briain

#9. Herbal medicine's been around for thousands of years! Indeed it has. And then we tested it all, and the stuff that worked became medicine. And the rest of it's just a nice bowl of soup and some pot pourri.

Dara O Briain

#10. There are three states of legality in Irish law. There is all this stuff which comes under That's grand, then it moves into Ah now don't push it, and finally it comes under Right now you're takin the piss, and that's when the police come in.

Dara O Briain

#11. If we were truly created by God, then why do we still occasionally bite the insides of our own mouths?

Dara O Briain