Really Witty Quotes

#1. The really witty man does not shower forth his wit so indiscriminately;

Cecil B. Hartley

#2. My parents have always had a great sense of humor. And I really appreciate good humor in songs, witty lyrics that sneak up on you and then you listen again, and say: 'That's so funny.' John Prine's songs have always had this really witty tone.

Kacey Musgraves

#3. Everyone remembers the pop-quiz hotshot bit from 'Speed' because it's extremely funny, and it's really smart and really witty. And the notion that action movies can have dialogue that pops just as well as the explosions is something that I hope more people continue to remember.

Graham Moore

#4. New Year's resolution: To refrain from saying witty, unkind things, unless they are really witty and irreparably damaging.

James Agate

#5. You're smart and witty. You're so talented and really have an eye for advertising. Trust in that, and trust in the person who interviewed you today to see that about you.

Victoria Michaels

#6. It's really crucial to achieve that balance with a film like this, cause it is unique and witty and then there's the tendency to force that. It becomes contrived and I know the feeling like, give me a fork that I can stab in my eye in those kinds of movies.

Ellen Page

#7. Yes. Reyn is our resident horse master. He has an excellent seat."
I grinned. "I've noticed."
Reyn's face tightened and Nell flushed, looking embarrassed. "It's an equestrian term."
"Really? I thought you were talking about his ass.

Cate Tiernan

#8. Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

George Carlin

#9. Never met such a Gorgon ... I don't really know what a Gorgon is like, but I am quite sure that Lady Bracknell is one. In any case, she is a monster, without being a myth, which is rather unfair.

Oscar Wilde

#10. I will not pretend I wasn't petrified. I was. But mixed in with the awful fear was a glorious feeling of excitement. Most of the really exciting things we do in our lives scare us to death. They wouldn't be exciting if they didn't.

Roald Dahl

#11. There's one thing that's really great about waking up early, and it's not jogging or greeting the day - it's just that that's when they make doughnuts.

Kathy Griffin

#12. Most wives fuck their husbands, just to ensure financial support. Marriage is just a form of legalized prostitution, when you really thought about it.

K. Syrah

#13. I most enjoyed doing 'Whites,' a show BBC2 cancelled after one series. It had some beautiful, witty, charming scripts and was one of the most positive ensemble pieces I've done. I thought the end result was really special. I'm still confused about why it didn't last longer.

Darren Boyd

#14. You been mud wrestling..?' 'Only with my conscience.' 'Really? Who won?' 'Well, it was one of those rare occasions when violence really doesn't solve anything.

Iain M. Banks

#15. My music started out as a complete joke, so really all I was doing was going for witty punchlines to make all of my buddies laugh.

Mike Stud

#16. Charles laughingly observed,'Gospel and the blues are really, if you break it down, almost the same thing. It's just a question of whether you're talkin' about a woman or God.

Craig Werner

#17. It's not fundamentally different to any other genre, that action is a particular thing. Being able to do action sounds like it should be straightforward, but it really isn't. I always want the action to be witty. I don't want it to be merely routine.

Adrian Hodges

#18. Winning supporters over can only really be achieved by what you do, not what you say. It's no use just smiling and shaking hands and getting quoted with witty one-liners.

Randy Lerner

#19. How often, when we have been nearest each other bodily, have we really been farthest off! Our tongues were the witty foils with which we fenced each other off.

Henry David Thoreau

#20. Would you consider a man or a woman to be complicated? Is it that difficult to understand both the sexes? We say that we know what the other sex is all about, but is that really true? Perhaps the following witty, funny quotes and sayings can help simplify things down about men.

Indira Gandhi

#21. Phil Hartman was brilliant, and Dave Foley is a really funny guy. Phil Hartman was actually even funnier offstage than he was onstage because he would say nasty things. Dave Foley's very funny, very witty guy, very quick.

Joe Rogan

#22. Whatever money you might have, self-worth really lies in finding out what you do best.

J.K. Rowling

#23. He things we think he's a double agent, working for them but secretly working for us. He doesn't know we know he's a triple agent, working for them but secretly working for us but really he's secretly working for them. Dexter, how's your brain?"
"Hurting.

Derek Landy

#24. I like quips. I like whiffs of cynicism and I think they can be witty. But I don't really know where wittiness is constructive.

Matthew McConaughey

#25. Yes it's going really well. We are planning on having a baby together.

Shahrukh Khan

#26. As an actor, you can really play the intensity and gravity and seriousness of the moment, and just rely on the circumstances being funny. The joke is kind of the situation you're in, or the way you're reacting to something, as opposed to the characters just saying something witty.

Ed Helms

#27. And it's really very difficult to kill someone when all your inner instincts would oblige you to take off your hat first!

Susan Kay

#28. What I think is that the F-word is basically just a convenient nasty-sounding word that we tend to use when we would really like to come up with a terrific-ally witty insult, the kind Winston Churchill always came up with when enormous women asked him stupid questions at parties.

Dave Barry

#29. Half is better than none unless it be of a wit.

Susan Lendroth

#30. No self-respecting criminal mastermind would be caught dead even using the word lollipops. He really would have to put together a database of witty responses for occasions such as this. It

Eoin Colfer