Quotes About Waitresses

#1. The service in L.A. is the best. You don't get sarcastic, surly, fed-up waiters and waitresses like you do in England. They're good at their job and they're there for the customer. The only depressing thing is a lot of them have written more screenplays than me.

Ricky Gervais

#2. I once waited on Sean Connery. A long time ago. This was at the Caledonian Hotel in Edinburgh. They closed down the restaurant for him, and when he walked in with his morning paper, all the waitresses started squealing. He was a big guy, bigger than in the movies.

Tony D'Souza

#3. Dad. I love that you aren't afraid to carry around romance novels with almost-naked men on the cover and hand them out as "tips" to waitresses, hairdressers, and anyone else you come across. Thanks for being one of my biggest fans.

Susan Stoker

#4. All I ask is that you tip your waiters and waitresses. We have to turn this situation around.

Jay Leno

#5. I'm not used to interviews. People don't generally interview waitresses.

Deborah Eisenberg

#6. As soon as a roast is announced, I get everybody - family, friends, waitresses, cab drivers - giving me jokes about the person getting roasted. I'm the mouthpiece for the masses.

Jeff Ross

#7. A poet could write volumes about diners, because they're so beautiful. They're brightly lit, with chrome and booths and Naugahyde and great waitresses. Now, it might not be so great in the health department, but I think diner food is really worth experiencing periodically.

David Lynch

#8. The tax incentives in place for 'House of Cards' in Maryland have resulted in hundreds and hundreds of jobs and not just for actors, but for carpenters and waitresses and hotel workers. The amount of hotel nights and meals that the production of a television series brings to a state is staggering.

Ted Sarandos

#9. My sister and I used to act as maids and waitresses at my great aunt and uncle's cocktail parties, which were very much sort of retired, minor stars of the Yiddish theater and the Yiddish opera.

Amy Bloom

#10. Eric," she said, "maybe someday one of the waitresses will get pregnant, and we
can go to a baby shower!"
"That would be something to see," said Eric

Charlaine Harris

#11. I wanted to be a comedian. I wanted to meet waitresses and felt that being a comedian was my best way to go about it and I was right.

Dana Gould

#12. In a series of articles beginning on Oct. 2, 1966, I wrote about the long-forgotten history of the Liberty Tree. To call attention to how obscure the site had become, I interviewed waitresses at the Essex Delicatessen below the plaque on Washington Street. None knew what the Liberty Tree was.

Ronald Kessler

#13. I hire a lot of waiters, waitresses. Someone who's successful has a background that's not predictable.

Mickey Drexler

#14. I drove a cab. But all the girls I knew when I was young who had to work - there were rich girls - but the ones who had to work were waitresses. Because you could always get shifts in a restaurant.

Fran Lebowitz

#15. True, science has conquered many diseases, broken the genetic code, and even placed human beings on the moon, and yet when a man of eighty is left in a room with two eighteen-year-old cocktail waitresses nothing happens.

Woody Allen

#16. I tend to play nurses and waitresses and policewomen.

Allison Tolman

#17. I'm thinking waiters and waitresses are going to be bracing for more customers coming in going, not just kind of where is that beef from, but, like, where is that vanilla from and what's up with that sunflower oil? Is it organic or not and how many pesticides?

Michael Moss

#18. Having less worries is what allows me to talk to beggars in the street or tell jokes at waitresses and try to make them smile. I couldn't do that before, when I had a job and was always worried about money.

Robin Sacredfire

#19. I like it here. I like the girls, and I like the DJ's, and the cocktail waitresses, and the loud rock'n'roll (though I would happily beat everyone in Poison to death with the severed limbs of the members of Warrant).

Craig Machen

#20. I prefer ordinary girls - you know, college students, waitresses, that sort of thing. Most of the girls I go out with are just good friends. Just because I go out to the cinema with a girl, it doesn't mean we are dating.

Leonardo DiCaprio

#21. Television, I love it, everything that happened before television lumped together, never caused folks to turn on a street to stare at me, or waitresses to ask for autographs.

Bennett Cerf

#22. Flappers sounds like where waitresses go after they're too old to work at Hooters.

Ray Romano

#23. Behind the bored eyes of the waitresses handing out sundaes there loomed, she knew, great earnestness, great desires, and great disappointments; such confusion lay ahead for them, and (more wearisome) anger; oh, before they were through, they would blame and blame and blame, and then get tired, too.

Elizabeth Strout

#24. I own the restaurant. There are a lot of cooks, waiters and waitresses in this restaurant. They worry about their problems. I worry about all the problems.

Mack Brown

#25. A ballet of nimble-footed waitresses moved among the tables

Beth Hoffman

#26. All the beautiful waitresses existed like eternal responsibilities.

Spalding Gray

#27. I mean, I've had bartenders and waiters and waitresses make a comment about a joke of mine, like pointing out some sort of logic error or something that I've never even thought about, and they're right.

Todd Barry

#28. Waiters and waitresses are becoming nicer and much more caring. I used to pay my check, they would say "Thank you." That's now escalated into "You care care of yourself, now." The other day I paid my check and the waiter said, "Don't put off that mammogram."

Rita Rudner

#29. Our chief justices have probably had more profound and lasting influence on their times and on the direction of the nation than most presidents.

Richard M. Nixon

#30. There are no twin souls in God's universe.

J.G. Holland

#31. Senator Martinez is not driven by polls; he is driven by the needs of the state of Florida and its 17 million constituents.

Mel Martinez

#32. I remember one time I tried to pity this fool. He told me his name was Jeff. He was married. He pulled out his wallet and showed me three pictures of his kids; Kelly, Robert, Brittany. Real cute kids. Don't get too close man. It's hard to pity a fool if you get too close.

Mr. T

#33. Even child abuse specialists do not routinely screen for domestic violence. This shows how much more education we need to do, even among experts, to understand the known links between violence of the child and the parent.

Jocelyn Brown

#34. The full moon rises. The fog clings to the lowest branches of the spruce trees. The man steps out of the darkest corner of the forest and finds himself transformed into ...
A monkey?
I think not.

Garth Stein

#35. Vampires get the joy of flying around and living forever, werewolves get the joy of animal spirits. But zombies, they're not rich, or aristocratic, they shuffle around. They're a group phenomenon, they're not very fast, they're quite sickly. So what's the pleasure of being one?

Margaret Atwood

#36. Why did I not remember, when I looked so deep into his eyes, that blue can be such a cold color? Why did I not notice that while I was saying so much, he was saying so little? I was a fool; I saw only the charmer and missed the snake entirely.

Brandy Purdy

#37. Ours is a circle of friendships united by ideals.

Juliette Gordon Low

#38. every line
inside his palm
and every fold
of his skin told me
the men like him
were made to be
written about.

Lauren Eden