Top 64 Housekeeper Quotes
#1. I was always a good housekeeper. Whenever I divorced I always kept the house.
Zsa Zsa Gabor
#2. Mrs Joe was a very clean housekeeper, but had an exquisite art of making her clenliness more umcomfortable and unacceptable than dirt itself. Cleanliness is next to godliness, and some people do the same by their religion.
Charles Dickens
#3. Get to see how he treats his mother/sister/housekeeper (critical clues as to how he will treat any prospective girlfriend).
Meg Cabot
#4. Yes, Siobhan ?" Rebus said by way of an answer.
"Page wants you inside the tent rather than out."
"Is that even possible ?"
"You'd be acting in a consultative capicity."
"Like Sherlock Holmes ? Would I need invoices & stuff ? And a housekeeper and a sidekick ?
Ian Rankin
#5. I swore I'd never become some lord's brainless arm ornament and political host, but I've become far worse. I'm a glorified housekeeper and sperm donor.
-from the journal of Payton Marcus Townsend.
J.L. Langley
#6. [...] a white magician is just a black magician with a good housekeeper.
Terry Pratchett
#7. The wife did not leave her own room, the husband had not been at home for three days. The children ran wild all over the house; the English governess quarreled with the housekeeper, and wrote
Leo Tolstoy
#8. The housekeeper had been there that afternoon. I could always tell because the sheets on the bed would be tucked in so tight, trying to get them out was like wrestling an alligator.
Tiffanie DeBartolo
#9. The only advantage of not being too good a housekeeper is that your guests are so pleased to feel how very much better they are.
Eleanor Roosevelt
#10. Only that I insist upon your dining with us. It will be ready in half an hour. I have oysters and a brace of grouse, with something a little choice in white wines. Watson, you have never yet recognized my merits as a housekeeper. ~ Sherlock Holmes
Arthur Conan Doyle
#11. A shotgun wedding performed by a fornicating vicar, featuring a reluctant bridegroom in love with the vicar's housekeeper and a frothing bride hellbent on revenge.
Elizabeth George
#12. He should have told her that whatever her station in life - cook, housekeeper, companion, governess, whatever, it mattered naught to him so long as she exchanged it for the position of his baroness. And
Grace Burrowes
#13. I was working like a dog as a housekeeper, barista, nanny, cook, so I could save enough money to really sit with my instruments. Whenever I had 20 minutes, I would practice a new chord or write a new verse.
Valerie June
#14. I am a very good housekeeper. which I have no reluctance in doing, because I really think it is my peculiar excellence, and for this reason, I always take care to provide such things as please my own appetite, which I consider as the chief merit in housekeeping.
Jane Austen
#15. If a man marries his housekeeper or his cook, the national dividend is diminished.
Arthur Cecil Pigou
#16. Among those kinds of food which the good housekeeper should scrupulously banish from her table, is that of hot leavened bread ... I believe it more often lays the foundation of diseases of the stomach, than any other kind of nourishment, used among us.
Sarah Josepha Hale
#17. I wasn't put on this earth to be housekeeper to my own child or to anyone else for that matter.
Lynn Freed
#19. My own approach to literary problems is very like the one Dr. Johnson's blind housekeeper used when she poured tea-she put her finger inside the cup.
Flannery O'Connor
#20. Please, don't fuck the housekeeper. I like her and if you do something that makes her quit, I will break your favorite drum sticks.
Terri Anne Browning
#21. I met this woman who was a hundred, this housekeeper, a hundred years old. I interviewed her. She just told me about her whole life. She's like, 'I can't read, I can't write; I can tell you who I was working for, and I can tell you the year, but who was president?'
Tate Taylor
#22. Some people come in and really freak. There's movement everywhere, even a dancing housekeeper!
Tom Bergeron
#23. It's not the nineteenth century; I'm not meant to be judged on how good a housekeeper I am. Getting down on the floor with a lemon and a bucket of vinegar does not make me a better person.
Emily Matchar
#24. I'm a great housekeeper. I get divorced. I keep the house.
Zsa Zsa Gabor
#25. A great statesman, like a good housekeeper, knows that cleaning has to be done every morning.
Andre Maurois
#26. I grew up in Houston, and I remember we had separate drinking fountains, and black people sat in the balcony of the theater ... We had an African-American housekeeper growing up who was really like my second mother. I thought it was silly - hatred just because of the color of somebody's skin.
Dennis Quaid
#27. I don't have a nanny or a housekeeper, and I only have a cleaner for one hour each week. I finish work and go home. I cook the dinner. I run into Tesco and do the housework in the evening.
Victoria Beckham
#28. Work ... family - I'm doing it all. But here's the secret I share with so many other nanny- and housekeeper-less mothers I see working the same balance: my house is trashed. It is strewn with socks and tutus.
Sandra Tsing Loh
#29. I am a good housekeeper. You can eat off my kitchen floor. Just scoop all the crumbs together and you've got quite a meal.
Janene Murphy
#30. I think my grandmother Woodrell was most responsible for my becoming a writer. She wasn't quite literate, but was very proud that she attended school as far as the third grade. She worked as a maid, housekeeper and cook.
Daniel Woodrell
#31. Consciousness may be seen as the haughty and restless second cousin of morphology. Memory is its mistress, perception its somewhat abused wife, logic its housekeeper, and language its poorly paid secretary
Gerald Edelman
#32. Should I ever marry, Watson, I should hope to inspire my wife with some feeling which would prevent her from being walked off by a housekeeper when my corpse was lying within a few yards of her.
Arthur Conan Doyle
#33. I never felt I could give up my life of freedom to become a man's housekeeper. When I was young, if a girl married poverty, she became a drudge; if she married wealth, she became a doll. Had I married at twenty-one, I would have been either a drudge or a doll for fifty-five years. Think of it!
Susan B. Anthony
#35. Before we can adorn our houses with beautiful objects the walls must be stripped, and our lives must be stripped, and beautiful housekeeping and beautiful living be laid for a foundation: now, a taste for the beautiful is most cultivated out of doors, where there is no house and no housekeeper.
Henry David Thoreau
#36. Guilt was not a good look for him - it gave one unsightly lines. And now he felt bad for being rude to the housekeeper, as well. Damnation. He was going to have to cheat at cards and seduce a married woman just to get his equilibrium back.
Kady Cross
#37. In everyday life I am quiet and reserved, not the housekeeper type but cool and relaxed. I don't get up in the morning wearing false eyelashes and I don't wear fancy underwear when I'm cooking popcorn. I'm a nice little ducky.
Madonna Ciccone
#38. I will be your neighbour, your nurse, your housekeeper. I find you lonely: I will be your companion
to read to you, to walk with you, to sit with you, to wait on you, to be eyes and hands to you. Cease to look so melancholy, my dear master; you shall not be left desolate, so long as I live.
Charlotte Bronte
#39. I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his house.
Zsa Zsa Gabor
#40. Zsa Zsa Gabor is an expert housekeeper. Every time she gets divorced, she keeps the house.
Henny Youngman
#41. Today when a man gets married he gets a home, a housekeeper, a cook, a cheering squad and another paycheck. When a woman marries, she gets a boarder. To define it rudely but not ineptly, engineering is the art of doing that well with one dollar, which any bungler can do with two after a fashion.
Duke Of Wellington
#42. When you're a housekeeper's daughter, you see the world through a half-open door.
Laraine Day
#43. Marriage is a bribe to make the housekeeper think she's a householder.
Thornton Wilder
#44. Dwelling-place and food are useful for life but give it no significance: the immediate goals of the housekeeper are only means, not true ends.
Simone De Beauvoir
#45. I did think of becoming a priest quite late on, when other boys were thinking of knocking over fences and going out with girls. I would have made a very good bishop: nice housekeeper, nice clothes - god, the clothes.
Colm Toibin
#46. At best, us ladies are just a bunch of Mirandas with a slightly better wardrobe and at worst, we're a bunch of Magdas, aka Miranda's housekeeper, which means we're a bunch of nosy bitches who rifle through people's belongings and let them know they masterbate too much.
Phoebe Robinson
#48. There's nothing my housekeeper does that I can't do - and maybe better!
Ivana Trump
#49. Only twice more did the housekeeper reappear, and then her stay in the room was very short, and Mr. Jaggers was sharp with her. But her hands were Estella's hands, and her eyes were Estella's eyes ...
Charles Dickens
#50. The whole Turkish empire is nothing else but a crust cast by Heaven's great Housekeeper to His dogs.
Martin Luther
#51. When I was young if a girl married poor, she became a housekeeper and a drudge. If she married wealthy, she became a pet and a doll. - Susan B. Anthony A
Gail Collins
#52. A fat house-keeper makes leane Executors.
[A fat housekeeper makes lean executors.]
George Herbert
#53. My mom worked as a housekeeper, and I saw her relationship with her employers - how on the one hand she spent more time with these women than with a lot of her friends, and how in certain ways they were friends. But then they weren't.
Jesmyn Ward
#54. The earth doesn't have a housekeeper to do the dusting.
Pablo Picasso
#55. The marriage is a bribe to make a housekeeper think she is a householder.
Thornton Wilder
#56. The one thing that makes me feel super lucky about my financial success is that I have a housekeeper.
Gwen Stefani
#57. As soon as the first piece of foliage came within blade's reach, my student started frantically swinging the machete like he was defending his virtue from a trove of drunken, handsy woodland elves. 'I feel like I'm in the movie Predator,' he said as he decapitated a flower.
Michael Gurnow
#58. My wife simply quoted, 'For better or worse.' It was only then that I realized the phrase was not multiple-choice.
Michael Gurnow
#59. I had not been prepared for my employer's approach to vehicular navigation, which was a simple case of being unable to tell the difference between a very large, multi-windowed van that could accommodate a mobile disco and a Formula One racer.
Michael Gurnow
#60. Few things in this world evoke scrotum-shriveling fear in a man like a group of frowning women, enraged to the point of atypical silence, ambling toward him with an obvious agenda.
Michael Gurnow
#61. 'I've been privileged to occasionally hear you sing in the shower and thought
what a voice. With a reasonable amount of training, it might actually be a voice I could listen to for more than a few minutes without getting a migraine.'
Barbara Elsborg
#62. I'd somehow managed to get an executive stuck in a tree. Instead of a saucer of milk and 'Here kitty, kitty, kitty,' someone might want to bring a hedge fund and a recording of George Bush promising 'No new taxes.
Michael Gurnow
#63. If owning frivolous articles of excess were indeed the trappings of malevolence, my home was ready to play host to the Axis powers.
Michael Gurnow
#64. At least Ozymandias had a statue erected in his name. If I were to have died at that moment, the only thing I had managed to erect in my honor was a shrine to China's manufacturing capabilities.
Michael Gurnow
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