Good Sarcastic Quotes

#1. I'm really good at being sarcastic with guys. That's the best way to hang out with them, because that's what guys . They don't want the quiet, prissy little things.

Jessica Alba

#2. I am surprised you didn't whack your head on an overhanging branch back there. I have never seen anyone leap straight up off the ground the way you did when you saw that snake! It would make a good move for our next dance. Do you think you could teach the others? The snake jump?

Jennifer Frick-Ruppert

#3. Well, you are a wolf, I don't think it's a good idea to start the habit of you sleeping in the bed, you know, with all the shedding and what-not.

Quinn Loftis

#4. Just for the record the weather today is slightly sarcastic, with a good chance of A. indifference and B. disinterest in what the critics say.

Panic At The Disco

#5. My father was a very unhappy person, very sarcastic, and my mother was very nervous and worried about what people thought. They weren't monsters, but it wasn't a good childhood.

Paula Danziger

#6. I don't even pretend to believe I know everything; I just believe in arguments God told me I had a pretty good chance of winning, while I was traveling through hell.

Shannon L. Alder

#7. I thought I'd lie on the floor and writhe in pain for a while," he grunted, "It relaxes me."
"It does? Oh - you're being sarcastic. That's a good sign probably.

Cassandra Clare

#8. Good to know: Doctors can't cure you of being a beast.

Alex Flinn

#9. When I was young, there weren't any teenage girls I could relate to in film. They were all put in boxes: the virginal good girl, the really sarcastic asexual one. I wanted to do something that represented how I felt then.

Bel Powley

#10. She's good, being gone.

William Shakespeare

#11. Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

George Carlin

#12. Folks always look good in their coffins.

Elvis Presley

#13. What do you call 500 lawyers lying on the bottom of the Ocean? A good start..

Danny DeVito

#14. i'm no good-girl-gone bad or goin O-na-na like Rihanna, but I'm gonna Work It like Iggy and Ride Like Lana.

Bee

#15. Ministers fall like buttered slices of bread: usually on their good side.

Ludwig Borne

#16. The service in L.A. is the best. You don't get sarcastic, surly, fed-up waiters and waitresses like you do in England. They're good at their job and they're there for the customer. The only depressing thing is a lot of them have written more screenplays than me.

Ricky Gervais

#17. And he still has clothes on, which means it couldn't have burned his skin in too many places. He'll be fine." "Yeah, good that," Newt replied with a sarcastic chuckle. "Remind me not to hire you as my buggin' doctor anytime soon.

James Dashner

#18. A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

Steven Wright

#19. You're sarcastic twelve hours a day, but you're almost never spiteful. You have a good heart under all the glitter.

Cassandra Clare

#20. He is as good as his word - and his word is no good.

Seumas MacManus

#21. Size does matter. There's a lot of ways to make people feel good, but personally I think it does enhance things.

Pamela Anderson

#22. Educational system in America is not as good as in China. You may be an idiot. It is hard to tell with you white people.

Kate Danley

#23. Really, if the lower orders don't set a good example, what on earth is the use of them?

Oscar Wilde

#24. This is one of those big, fat paperbacks, intended to while away a monsoon or two, which, if thrown with a good overarm action, will bring a water buffalo to its knees.

Nancy Banks-Smith

#25. I was never very good at being an unemployed actor. I always thought that I should have been doing something pro-active. I was never good at doing juvenile leads. I suppose it's because I have this big sarcastic head on me.

Deirdre O'Kane

#26. I have only one ambition left: I should like to have a good epitaph.

Otto Von Bismarck

#27. It pains me to admit this, but Roger was a good sight less stupid than most children.

Heidi Schulz

#28. You can always reason with a German. You can always reason with a barnyard animal, too, for all the good it does.

P. J. O'Rourke

#29. EVANGELIST, n. A bearer of good tidings, particularly (in a religious sense) such as assure us of our own salvation and the damnation of our neighbors.

Ambrose Bierce