Funny Spit Quotes

#1. Please don't go. I just got you back

Jessica Sorensen

#2. Prayer draws us near to our own souls.

Herman Melville

#3. Put Down The Fork & Get Moving

Joan Minnery

#4. When you choose to view your stress response as helpful, you create the biology of courage.

Kelly McGonigal

#5. Two men spit in their hands, help each other out, then laugh about it later. Just to be silly.

Jim Norton

#6. What other secrets are you hiding behind those sparkling eyes?"
He grinned. "You have my heart. That's where I hide all my secrets."
"Then I guess I don't have the key."
"Are you kidding? You forged the key.

Darynda Jones

#7. I'm gonna make you hairless where God didn't intend.

Ashlan Thomas

#8. He runs to the sink to spit it out. I grin. There's nothing quite as funny as someone else's misery.

Holly Black

#9. I'm a rock-and-roll drummer, so my job is to create chaos.

Greg Saunier

#10. I had bitten into my tongue, and I either had to spit or swallow. I swallowed. No comments, please.

Jim Butcher

#11. When a woman with an iron fist tells you to get out there and clean spit off the door, you do it. Especially when the iron's hot.

Markus Zusak

#12. I was surprised he didn't just spit the nails into the wood like Popeye the Sailor Man.

Josh Lanyon

#13. Angelina leaned forward as Sara pulled Miki back to her, You know what they say about curiosity? That it stabbed the annoying biker girl over and over and over again until she spit up blood.

Shelly Laurenston

#14. My mind has been the most discontented and restless one that ever was put into a body too small for it.

John Keats

#15. He allowed the world to wind him in the final set of chains, and climbed, once and for all, into the cabinet of mysteries that was the life of an ordinary man.

Michael Chabon

#16. Shit," Seth grunts. "Maybe he does have a magic dick."
Jackson snickers, but I don't find it funny at all. Not in the slightest.
"He doesn't have a magic dick." I spit. "You two are just being immature.

Skyla Madi

#17. It is a confession of the weakness of our own faith in the righteousness of our cause when we attempt to suppress by law those who do not agree with us.
Alfred E. Smith, governor of New York after WWI

Alfred E. Smith

#18. Every time a baseball player grabs his crotch, it makes him spit. That's why you should never date a baseball player.

Marsha Warfield

#19. It's funny. You take adults, they look lousy when they're asleep and they have their mouths way open, but kids don't. Kids look alright. They can even have spit all over the pillow and they still look alright.

J.D. Salinger

#20. Men who listen to classical music tend not to spit.

Rita Rudner

#21. She shuddered. What is it with slobbery kissers? Are they trying to drown us in spit? I mean, Jesus, swallow every now and then.

Tammara Webber

#22. Arrogance really comes from insecurity, and in the end our feeling that we are bigger than others is really the flip side of our feeling that we are smaller than others.

Desmond Tutu

#23. 'Government gets things right' does not encourage sales. 'Government makes another blunder' does encourage sales, so there's a commercial imperative that pushes sensationalism.

John Major

#24. You can literally go on and on and on with the blame game, but let me tell you, it only causes more heartache. You will be no better off and will still have no answers.

Sharon Critchfield