Funny Piano Sayings

#1. Religion is the cause of all the problems in the world. I don't believe in organized religion at all. It's what separates people. One religion just represents fragments, it causes war. More people have died because of religious conflict than any other reason.

Gwyneth Paltrow

#2. A football team is like a piano. You need eight men to carry it and three who can play the damn thing.

Bill Shankly

#3. The fact of playing an instrument and singing ... that I can try to make my dream of singing and becoming a professional musician come true is linked probably to the fact that I traveled a lot, which gave me an open mind and an ability to push my limits.

Rokia Traore

#4. So I got creative. Carrots! (They seem to be the answer to most of my food problems.)

Minecrafty Family Books

#5. Comedy, I figured, was the thing that came to me the most easily. Playing the trumpet and piano took practice. I thought that was a waste of time. I'd go out on the street corner and be funny. In a minute.

George Carlin

#6. (Referring to the piano's natural shape) Isn't it a shame when those big fat opera singers lean against the pianos and bend them?

Victor Borge

#7. We developed our own type of Igudesman and Joo electric violin, let's say, and funny enough, the shape of it was developed by the head technician of Steinway. It's actually an electric violin, which is made from the stick that holds up the piano lid.

Aleksey Igudesman

#8. People see it [boxing] as a physical contact sport, but it's not. It's really a spiritual one of will against will. Who wants it the most? How much is he willing to take - and dish out - to get it? It's like fighting is 10 percent physical and 90 percent emotional.

Mike Tyson

#9. It's funny: I'm a lifelong musician, but because I principally play the piano it's been a solitary thing.

Gary Oldman

#10. You're going very fast when you're on orbit, going around the world once every hour and a half.

Robert Crippen

#11. What am I supposed to do if I go bald? Get a wig? Fat, goofy, gay, wig. I might as well get a piano and start an Elton John tribute act!

Alan Carr

#12. Men love watches with multiple functions. My husband has one that is a combination address book, telescope and piano.

Rita Rudner

#13. Figures tell us there are already more people on earth than we need to move even the heaviest piano.

Woody Allen

#14. I really wanted to find a piano for the farm house. There were so many free pianos on Craigslist, I thought, 'Let's get as many free pianos as we can and stick them all in the barn.' I got eight in a short period of time, only six of which were tunable, but it's still quite funny.

Neko Case

#15. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racing car not called a racist?

Steven Wright

#16. Where is the coward that would not dare to fight for such a land as Scotland?

Walter Scott

#17. If you admit a unison, you forfeit all the possibilities of chaos ... Love is a direction which excludes all other directions. It is a freedom together, if you like.

D.H. Lawrence

#18. The Rolling Stones suffered a great loss with the death of Ian Stewart, the man who had for so many years played piano quietly and silently with them on stage.

Andy Peebles

#19. I'm gonna go put my earplugs in and practice piano for hours until my fingers bleed. I practice the piano with the focus of Helen Keller - and nothing can distract me from the scent of the music.
-Karen Quan and Jarod Kintz

Karen Quan