Funny Pee Quotes

#1. I had a dream about you. We were in a canoe, and we were paddling across the desert. You said you were thirsty, and I pointed to the sand that surrounded us and said, "No, I will not urinate in your mouth." At that point I woke up, because I realized I really had to pee - and get a drink of water.

Dora J. Arod

#2. I should stalk over there and pee around his table to stake my claim. Wait ... what? Jeez, Kacey.

K.A. Tucker

#3. Henry Ford had the additional distinction of being the only American mentioned favorably in Mein Kampf, Adolf Hitler's memoir of 1925.

Bill Bryson

#4. I can smell burning flesh ... and I hope to God it's human.

Steven Morrissey

#5. I scoop a clattering cascade of green apple Jelly Bellys into the white paper bag and remember when we were seven. I got stung by a jellyfish. Tim cried because his mother, and mine, wouldn't let him pee on my leg, which he'd heard was an antidote to the sting.

Huntley Fitzpatrick

#6. Was it animal pee or human pee? Someone asked.
How would I know? What, am I an expert in the study of pee?

John Green

#7. You hate birthdays yet pee your pants over presents. There is clearly something wrong with you, Garrett joked.

Tara Sivec

#8. I guess none of us will get through this without some terrible sin. This will be mine.

Katherine Applegate

#9. We must not look for some kind of Messiah.

Neil Kinnock

#10. In my first video diary I explained my love for women who have a taste in carrots. Since then, I have received plenty of carrots. Now I also have a keen interest in women who like Lamborghinis.

Louis Tomlinson

#11. A love of books has opened so many doors for me. Stories have inspired me and taught me to aspire.

Malorie Blackman

#12. I've seen with my own students, community colleges offer an affordable route to four-year college degrees and good paying jobs.

Jill Biden

#13. We pray with sometimes unseemly insistence for specific things to happen. We give no thought to the myriad ways in which they might come to pass.

John Burgess

#14. Let me just be in the ground.
Let me just be in the ground and go to sleep.

Joan Didion

#15. Shadowhunters lived through scars. Sometimes he thought they lived for them.

Cassandra Clare

#16. Pleasant it is, when over a great sea the winds trouble the waters, to gaze from shore upon another's great tribulation; not because any man's troubles are a delectable joy, but because to perceive you are free of them yourself is pleasant.

Lucretius

#17. Do you like being teased?" I whispered.
"I enjoy previews," he said, the words confident, but his voice rough with arousal.
-Merit and Ethan

Chloe Neill

#18. Internet is puberty of society.

Mohit Parikh

#19. There really isn't much use in getting into a pissing contest since I have to sit down to pee anyway.

Tammy Blackwell