Funny Complaining Sayings

#1. I know I really shouldn't be complaining right now,

Nicholas Murray

#2. They'd be complaining about having to walk, and screeching at me to 'do something, Freddy, do something!'"
"But what could you do?" she said, puzzled.
"Carry them, probably." He gave her a hopeful look. "Do you want me to carry you?

Anne Gracie

#3. Complaining that a comic is drunk is like going to a titty bar and complaining because your lapdancer is a communist.

Doug Stanhope

#4. To achieve your ethereal state, you have to expand your thoughtless awareness.

Nirmala Srivastava

#5. One single gift acknowledged in gratefulness has the power to dissolve the ties of our alienation.

David Steindl-Rast

#6. The trade deficit is the capital surplus and don't ever think of having a capital surplus as being a bad thing for our country.

Arthur Laffer

#7. In that one stolen second, I considered the Glebe girl. She entered my mind like a burglar, them vanished again, taking nothing. It was like the humiliation of the past had been dragged instantly from my back and left somewhere on the ground.

Markus Zusak

#8. The biggest lesson I've learned ... was that if you have all the fresh water you want to drink and all the food you want to eat, you ought never to complain about anything.

Eddie Rickenbacker

#9. You could just watch your belly grow bigger and no one would be allowed to ask you about it and you would have your baby and a year later you would allow visitors to finally come and meet your little miracle.

Amy Poehler

#10. The lion and the lamb may, possibly, sumtime lay down in this world together for a fu minnits, but when the lion kums tew git up, the lamb will be missing.

Josh Billings

#11. God has to nearly kill us sometimes, to teach us lessons.

John Muir

#12. I must be getting absent-minded. Whenever I complain that things aren't what they used to be, I always forget to include myself.

George Burns

#13. When you have a passion for something then you tend not only to be better at it, but you work harder at it too.

Vera Wang

#14. A few years ago I met an old professor at the University of Notre Dame. Looking back on his long life of teaching, he said with a funny wrinkle in his eyes: I have always been complaining that my work was constantly interrupted, until I slowly discovered that my interruptions were my work.

Henri Nouwen

#15. When we know better, we do better.

Maya Angelou

#16. I find it funny because people complain about Brooklyn becoming too hip, but would they prefer stock brokers or gunfights or something?

Kemp Muhl

#17. The more you complain the longer God lets you live

Bertrand Russell

#18. People fail forward to success.

Mary Kay Ash

#19. Pg. 231-232: They'd given me a minivan. They could have picked any car and they picked a minivan. A minivan. O God of the Vehicular Justice, why dost thou mock me? Minivan, you albatross around my neck! You mark of Cain! You wretched beast high ceilings and few horsepower!

John Green

#20. I was in a hotel room in Dallas, and I was jerking off so much and so sadly and pathetically, that the phone rang, and I thought it's them, they're complaining ... "Sir, could you please stop?"

Louis C.K.

#21. I don't need another 'adversity builds character' speech, Darren. That man is a chauvinistic pig. Where's your adversity?"
Darren raised a brow. "I'm looking at it.

Rachel E. Carter

#22. Girls are always complaining that they can never meet a nice guy. Nice guys are everywhere. The problem isn't that there aren't any nice guys, the problem is that all of the nice guys are ugly.

Carroll Bryant