Before Divorce Quotes

#1. Most grandiose gestures are suspect - the couple who renew their vows just before divorce or the politician who publicly swears he's clean, then enters rehab. Building

Chris Offutt

#2. One last "happy" thought: Your marriage will end either in death or divorce. (Think about it!) So well before the "I do's" (and the eventual tears), why not give both of yourselves a chance for a marriage that can be the best it can be?

J. Thomas Steele

#3. It is well to be off with the old woman before you're on with the new.

George Bernard Shaw

#4. Divorce is marital welfare.It's just couples asking society to bail them out because they didn't do enough research before they got married.

Stephen Colbert

#5. With my divorce, and even during the end of my marriage before it even got publicly bad, how I decided to cope with things was to go on the treadmill for an hour.

Khloe Kardashian

#6. I find it funny that you could pass the same person on the street, in a store, or even in your neighborhood many times before actually meeting, thinking you've never seen them before, but when you are finally introduced, they seem to pop up everywhere.

Courtney Giardina

#7. The groom should not see you in the dress just before the wedding, that's bad luck. You know what's worst luck? Is getting married, itself. I've read studies. It's like 2 out of 3 of those end in divorce, sometimes more. 3 out of 2, some.

Hank Moody

#8. Perhaps the old view of 'Me breadwinner, you hausfrau' worked for our grandparents, when people obligingly popped off before boring each other to death, but it won't work any longer because we are living too long and divorce is needed today to do what death acomplished more economically before.

Merle Shain

#9. It was one of those ridiculous arrangements that couples make when they are separating, but before they are divorced - when they still imagine that children and property can be shared with more magnanimity than recrimination.

John Irving

#10. You made a lifetime commitment before God and the world. A silly thing like a divorce doesn't reverse it.

Kellyn Roth

#11. Stewart, Jr. who was called Stewie Two, graduated from Steering before Garp was even of age to enter the school; Jenny treated Stewie Two twice for a sprained ankle and once for gonorrhea. He later went through Harvard Business School, a staph infection, and a divorce.

John Irving

#12. I found out about Jonathan Winters' death a day after it happened. That seems wrong. A talent like his should be more revered. The world knew about Kim Kardashian's divorce before she did.

Gilbert Gottfried

#13. It's important to prepare audience for the worst in life. People come to forget their problems, and it's my job, right before I leave, to go, "Don't forget: You're going through a divorce and there's a recession." It's always good to end on a pensive note.

Eugene Mirman

#14. My fans saw me get engaged, saw me make that woman my wife, me having kids, me divorcing, me talking about divorce before the divorce, me talking about my kids' reaction to that divorce.

Kevin Hart

#15. My parents never got along super well, but it had grown worse in the last year before he left. Eventually he moved to an apartment on the other side of town, where he stayed for almost five months while the divorce wound its way through the intestinal tract of the county courts. I

Dan Wells

#16. Marriage counselors in particular all strongly recommend divorcees try to understand their role in a divorce before re-marrying. Statistics show if you re-marry before you've clearly seen things from the biter's point of view - you're re-bounded to fail again!

Karen Salmansohn

#17. you say
we were never
meant for this vowed life,
golden bands of only us, and death
do us part. you
say love like it's held in quotation marks,
that this union soured before
it started.

Beth Morey

#18. If a man is going to leave one wife to marry another, it's better if he divorces the first before he marries the second.

Joseph Heller

#19. The importance of human life should be universally respected - and that refers to children before they are born and after. All children have the right to be brought up in a loving two-parent family where the notion of divorce is not even possible.

Christopher Monckton

#20. When a couple decides to divorce, they should inform both sets of parents before having a party and telling all their friends. This is not only courteous but practical. Parents may be very willing to pitch in with comments, criticism, and malicious gossip of their own to help the divorce along.

P. J. O'Rourke

#21. My name is John Taylor. I'm a private eye, specialising in cases of the weird and uncanny. I don't solve murders, I don't do divorce work, and I wouldn't recognise a clue if you held it up before my face and said Look, this is a clue.

Simon R. Green

#22. After my parents' divorce when I was 4, I spent weekends with my dad before we finally moved to California. By the time Sunday rolled around, I was incapable of enjoying the day's activities, of being in the moment, because I was already dreading the inevitable goodbye of Sunday evening.

Rob Lowe

#23. Well ... not exactly together. He'd buy a sofa and I'd buy a couple of matching chairs. One has to plan on divorce at all times ... still, it was a landmark of sorts. I'd never gotten to the furniture-buying stage before.

Armistead Maupin

#24. In my experience, divorce takes you out for about 10 years, but you hear people talk about it lightly. The same with depression. You only have to have one good breakdown before you realize you need help. It's pretty frightening.

Julia Cameron

#25. Divorce is a marital welfare. It's just couples asking society to bail them out because they didn't do enough research before they got married. How is that our fault? Don't drag down my country's statistics just because you ran off and got hitched before you ever saw each other in a bad mood.

Stephen Colbert

#26. When you are interviewing refugees, each person you talk to has a different story that could come from a horror movie. So many people talk about seeing their families get murdered before their eyes. Then I go to Central Park, and people are talking about their third divorce and paying tuition.

Brandon Stanton

#27. The same conditions that prevailed in Rome prevail in our society. Before Rome fell, her standards were abandoned, the family disintegrated, divorce prevailed, immorality was rampant, and faith was at a low ebb.

Billy Graham

#28. Somehow, we both got carried away. I don't know exactly how it happened, but before long, I knew nothing was ever going to be the same.

Brenda Perlin

#29. As close as we'd been when we were together, we were closer in our unraveling, telling each other everything at last, words that seemed to us might never have been spoken between two human beings before, so deep we went, saying everything that was beautiful and ugly and true.

Cheryl Strayed

#30. Living with myself wasn't all that easy. I was not the young girl I once was. Once upon a time when I looked in the mirror, I saw this happy glow. Now nothing glowed except the leftover face cream from the night before.

Brenda Perlin

#31. The Quran gave women rights of inheritance and divorce centuries before Western women were accorded such status. The

Karen Armstrong

#32. Aching familiar in a way that made me wish I was still eight. Eight was before death or divorce or heartbreak. Eight was just eight. Hot dogs and peanut butter, mosquito bites and splinters, bikes and boogie boards. Tangled hair, sunburned shoulders, Judy Blume, in bed by nine thirty.

Jenny Han

#33. Being married definitely took work. When we fought, I felt like I wanted to float away and drown, whereas before I knew I could walk away without any strings attached.

Brenda Perlin

#34. I was devastated when I got the review for my first book. The book came out a couple years before the women's movement broke through, and people were putting it down, asking, 'Why does the woman in this book need to get a divorce? Why can't she just shut up and be happy?'

Gail Sheehy

#35. Watching news showing all the same sex marriages. How long before first same sex divorce?

Alonzo Bodden

#36. Divorce is one of the loneliest of modern rituals. Before, during, and after the actual culmination of the legal process it is an ordeal that rips people away from their roots, their important relationships, and a part of themselves. There is really nothing like it - except perhaps war.

Suzanne Gordon

#37. The worst problems for children stem from parental conflict, before, during, and after divorce or within marriage.

Stephanie Coontz

#38. The leaving happened slowly, gradually, as these things do, and before we knew it, we were lost to each other, as if a magician had whisked a cloth off the table, leaving the dishes there, jolted. And when we looked back it was all a blur, time on fast forward, hurtling to an inevitable conclusion.

Kathryn Stern

#39. Everybody is agreeing so tersely. I just had a flashback to the month before my parents finally admitted they were getting a divorce.

Samantha Bee