Baseball Bat Quotes

#1. You take all the offensive linemen and put them in a burlap bag, and then you take a baseball bat and beat on the bag. You're sacking them. You're bagging them. And that's what you're doing with a quarterback.

Deacon Jones

#2. Yeah we're not together anymore. She has got - she has got a new boyfriend now. They just moved into together. And I've heard rumors that he is abusive, which makes you want to go over there with a baseball bat. And then blame it on her boyfriend.

Anthony Jeselnik

#3. I'm from Boston, and in Boston, you are born with a baseball bat in your hand. And actually, most of the bats in Massachusetts are used off the field instead of on the field, and we all had baseball bats in our cars in high school.

Eli Roth

#4. Sure, I hung out around Red Witch Bridge in the middle of the night, but that was in the cover of the trees with an urban legend and a baseball bat as weapons.

Francesca Zappia

#5. One night I went over to get some dope from some Hollywood tough guy. After I left, my son Scott, who was only fifteen, went over with a baseball bat to kill him. I was laughing out of one eye and crying out of the other. I thought, Who am I kidding?

James Caan

#6. He'd fallen in love with Quinn slowly, quietly. With Dima, it was like a baseball bat upside the head, these feelings. They completely swamped him, made him want different things, made him want to be different.

Avril Ashton

#7. Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.

Andy Rooney

#8. One guy wore nothing but a Speedo. He'd painted himself blue and was armed only with a baseball bat. Across his chest were the words COME AT ME, BRO.

Rick Riordan

#9. To enter the past is like poking a baseball bat into a spiderweb: it can't be done subtly or delicately.

Robert Silverberg

#10. When you go into a room, you knock first. If you start asking people questions and they start tilting back in their chairs, it means they don't want to talk about it. It means if you look at something on their computer screens, they're likely to knock your brains out with a baseball bat.

Carol Plum-Ucci

#11. The questions came ... hurling at him ... like the balls from a baseball pitching machine ... just one after the other without a care or concern of where they went - but he couldn't hit them, he didn't have a baseball bat - he only had a toothpick!

Mallika Nawal

#12. Ah wonder if anybody this side of the Atlantic has ever bought a baseball bat with playing baseball in mind.

Irvine Welsh

#13. If a guy is taking his girl for granted, he really deserves a slap, with a baseball bat.

Louis Tomlinson

#14. Next time you want to hit me
hit me with a baseball bat or a crowbar!

Stephenie Meyer

#15. This whole thing about not kicking someone when they are down is b.s. Not only do you kick him - you kick him until he passes out - then beat him over the head with a baseball bat - then roll him up in an old rug - and throw him off a cliff into the pounding surf below!!!!!

Michael Scanlon

#16. How do you combat a man with a firearm? You don't combat him with a golf club, baseball bat or a knife. You combat him with another firearm.

Luke Scott

#17. A husband? A psychopathic stalker? Frank's mind whirled with images of her being raped in the parking lot by some Neanderthal with a baseball bat while he lay bleeding and unconscious on the gravel next to her.

Pete Kahle

#18. If I had a baseball bat and bulldozer, maybe I could stop him. But without real weapons, without a pistol, a man-eating lion, and a vial of bubonic plague, I had zero change of competing against him.

Sherman Alexie

#19. Spooky things happen in houses densely occupied by adolescent boys. When I checked out a four-inch dent in the living room ceilingone afternoon, even the kid still holding the baseball bat looked genuinely baffled about how he possibly could have done it.

Mary Blakely

#20. The Golf Hall of Fame is full of players with unusual looking swings. Some of the prettiest swings you've ever seen in your life are made on the far end of the public driving range by guys who couldn't break an egg with a baseball bat.

Peter Jacobsen

#21. And if I see you step foot on my property again, I'll do more than make a phone call, he says, waving the baseball bat around menacingly.

Sarah Darer Littman

#22. You know, I'm from Boston, and in Boston, you are born with a baseball bat in your hand.

Eli Roth

#23. If you want to end darkness you cannot beat it with a baseball bat, you have to turn on a light.

Marianne Williamson

#24. It is the difference between hitting with a pillow and hitting with a baseball bat.

William Brohaugh

#25. There were very strict social conventions, and you adhered to it, and I think it gave you a lot of character. When a man said something, he meant it. He wasn't kidding around. There were no jokes involved. Nobody was in the mood to joke unless you hit a guy with a baseball bat.

Jack Kirby

#26. Of course I'm going to the front door like a stupid chick in a horror movie," he muttered. On his way to the door, he doubled back and grabbed a baseball bat from the closet. "Now I just have to remember not to go outside and ask if anyone is there.

Amanda Hocking

#27. No, I would not say that assault with a baseball bat constitutes "justice being done.

Garth Ennis

#28. I got scars on my face that tell some kind of story. I'm looking in the mirror, and I got one scar that's really two scars - half from a baseball bat and half from playing football in college. I'll tell you, though, after a while, your face gets so wrinkled up you can hardly see them.

Kris Kristofferson

#29. If somebody is really trying to take your head off with a baseball bat - I don't know how long you're supposed to stand there and turn the other cheek, so he or she can get a better angle at taking your head off.

Maya Angelou

#30. When you die, every single muscle in your body hurts. Your body has closed down because it thinks it's done, and when it gets rebooted, every inch of you hurts. Plus I'd had the shit beaten out of me with a baseball bat.

Nikki Sixx

#31. DIE!" Gleeson Hedge dropped directly behind Orion, smacking his baseball bat over the giant's head so hard the Louisville Slugger cracked in half.

Rick Riordan

#32. I feel like, when I arrive at the hospital, I want a glass of whiskey, I want the epidural in my back and I want to get hit in the face with a baseball bat.

Kristen Bell

#33. There are some people who might look better if you smacked them in the head with a baseball bat.

Jared Leto

#34. I didn't know if I still had it in me to be really dangerous, but I thought so. It's like knocking someone off a bike with a baseball bat; you never really lose the knack.

Simon R. Green

#35. I studied Jeet Kune Do and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. On element of Jeet Kune Do is that I had several of years of practice with the kali stick - a stick with a size and length similar to a baseball bat.

Jose Pablo Cantillo

#36. I look in the mirror and I don't see a sex symbol. I just see a guy who looks like he's been beaten with a baseball bat. I mean, is this the face of a sex symbol? They say that because I work in the movies.

Javier Bardem

#37. brace covered his neck. Dark, fingerless gloves covered his hands to allow a better grip on his shotgun. An aluminum baseball bat was slung across his back, Samurai-style, in a crude scabbard next to a large backpack He

Keith C. Blackmore

#38. When I find the motherfucker who tortured an innocent cat to death just to send us a warning, I'm going to clobber him with a baseball bat

Stieg Larsson

#39. Even the toughest of brothers can't make their sister change the things they think they are entitled to. They can't move you away from the jerks. They can simply hold their breath and their baseball bat.

Alida Nugent

#40. If I ever modelled for Calvin Klein I'd give myself to a flock of fans to beat me silly with a baseball bat.

Joey Jordison

#41. I've been on 'Criminal Minds' twice! On the first show, a boy brought kids out to the woods and was beating them with a baseball bat, but I got away. Then they brought Tracy, my character, back - as a kidnapped girl. They saved me two times! Tracy lived!

Elle Fanning

#42. I grew up in the '60s, which was a creative time, so it wasn't that big of a stretch to go from a baseball bat to a guitar to a film camera.

Abel Ferrara

#43. If there is one thing I know, it's that with every great achievement in our lives, there is an insecure idiot hiding around the corner waiting to take a baseball bat to it.

Dan Pearce

#44. When she returned, she smiled and said, "We were at the movies once, and this dork took two phone calls during the film. Later we followed him, and Andre broke both his legs with a baseball bat."
This proved that even the most evil people could occasionally have a socially responsible impulse.

Dean Koontz

#45. I really wasn't sure if I wanted this guy knowing where I lived. After all, he was wielding a baseball bat, and I had just seen him strike several people with that bat.

Holly Hood

#46. Death doesn't bother me but murder makes me edgy, and my lack of weaponry suddenly felt like a potentially fatal mistake. If we got back to the hotel alive, I wasn't coming back here again without my knife and the baseball bat. And maybe a tank, if I could find one fast enough.

Seanan McGuire

#47. I think you intentionally overreacted. Like killing a fly with a baseball bat, just to make sure it never bothers you again.

Kelley Armstrong

#48. When you're mad at someone, it's probably best not to break his arm with a baseball bat.

Evel Knievel

#49. They took a baseball bat and whacked open his head. Mummy Boy fell to the ground; he finally was dead. Inside of his head were no candy or prizes, just a few stray beetles of various sizes.

Tim Burton

#50. If people got hit on the head by a baseball bat every week, pretty soon they would invent reasons why getting hit on the head with a baseball bat was a good thing.

Eliezer Yudkowsky

#51. The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying, "Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses." She's got a baseball bat and yelling "You want a piece of me?

Robin Williams

#52. The beanball is one of the meanest things on Earth and no decent fellow would use it. The beanball is a potential murderer. If I were a batter and thought the pitcher really tried to bean me, I'd be inclined to wait for him outside the park with a baseball bat.

Walter Johnson

#53. Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat.

Joel Osteen

#54. She wielded it easily, lightly. She carried it swinging like a baseball bat, only with more poetry to it. It was a frightening thing to watch, this small shadow of billowing grey fabric and sprawling, wild hair splaying out behind her, the axe held at the ready with both hands, poised and prepared.

Cherie Priest

#55. I developed a term that is used in the game right now called sacking a quarterback. Sacking a quarterback is just like you devastate a city or you cream a multitude of people. I mean it's just like you put all the offensive players in one bag and I just take a baseball bat and beat on the bag.

Deacon Jones

#56. A baseball bat could not have hit me harder than that smile did. I was sixteen years old. In that time, how many thousands of smiles had been aimed at me? so why did this one feel like the first?

Jerry Spinelli

#57. My dream holiday would be a) a ticket to Amsterdam b) immunity from
prosecution and c) a baseball bat.

Terry Pratchett

#58. The crack of the bat, the sound of baseballs thumping into gloves, the infield chatter are like birdsong to the baseball starved.

W.P. Kinsella

#59. Well, boys, it's a round ball and a round bat and you got to hit the ball square.

Joe Schultz

#60. I don't make speeches. I just let my bat speak for me in the summertime.

Honus Wagner

#61. I would think I drive most hitting coaches crazy. During one single at-bat I used six different stances on six pitches. Oh yeah, I also struck out. So what do I know?

John Kruk

#62. He was also a terrific baseball player. That's what had helped him refine his waist: tens of thousands of reps twisting to swing a bat.

Arnold Schwarzenegger

#63. He (Eric Davis) gets power from his bat speed ... it's like he has cork in his arms.

Pete Rose

#64. Baseball just a came as simple as a ball and bat. Yet, as complex as the American spirit it symbolizes. A sport, a business and sometimes almost even a religion.

Ernie Harwell

#65. I never expectedto lose in court. In practice, I did lose, of course. Every lawyer loses, just as every baseball player makes an out severy percent of the time he goes to bat.

William Landay

#66. My father gave me a bat for Christmas. The first time I tried to play with it, it flew away.

Rodney Dangerfield

#67. We try to take it from one at-bat to the next, ya know it's easier said than done, but all put together it looks good in the end.

Evan Longoria

#68. Football, you can go out and buy a football and play it in your backyard. Basketball, you can go out and play it in the schoolyard or in your driveway. Baseball, you get a glove and a bat and a ball and you go out and play in the neighborhood. You can't do that in hockey.

Jeremy Roenick

#69. Baseball is very big with my people. It figures. It's the only way we can get to shake a bat at a white man without starting a riot.

Dick Gregory

#70. An alluring woman
need not bat an eyelash
to hit a homer
and steal a man's heart.

Khang Kijarro Nguyen

#71. When I started in professional baseball, I had what you might call a rude awakening. See this scar right next to my left ear? That's where the pitcher hit me the very first time I came to bat as a pro. I was out cold for about 10 minutes.

Billy Herman

#72. Whether your name is (Lou) Gehrig or (Cal) Ripken, (Joe) DiMaggio or (Jackie) Robinson, or that of some youngster who picks up his bat or puts on his glove, you are challenged by the game of baseball to do your very best day in and day out. That's all I've ever tried to do.

Cal Ripken Jr.

#73. I have an Alka-Seltzer bat. You know-plop, plop, fizz, fizz, when the pitcher sees me walking up there he says, 'Oh, what a relief it is'.

Andy Van Slyke

#74. Babe Ruth made a baseball fan of me. I used to go to Yankee Stadium just to see him come to bat.

Effa Manley

#75. During my 18 years I came to bat almost 10,000 times. I struck out about 1,700 times and walked maybe 1,800 times. You figure a ballplayer will average about 500 at bats a season. That means I played seven years without ever hitting the ball.

Mickey Mantle

#76. Hitting a baseball well, as in cricket, is a very rare skill. One of most difficult things to do in the world to do, hitting a ball coming at you at ninety miles an hour with a round bat. Wonderful to watch.

Peter Tork

#77. The hardest thing to do in baseball is to hit a round baseball with a round bat, squarely.

Ted Williams

#78. You can shake a dozen glove men out of a tree, but the bat separates the men from the boys.

Dale Long

#79. It was always fun for me, I loved baseball so darn much. By the hours I practiced, you'd have to say I was working a lot of hours, but it was pretty near tireless fun for me. I'd rather swing a bat than do anything else in the world.

Ted Williams

#80. I'd get me a bunch of bats and balls and sneak me a couple of umpires and learn them kids behind the Iron Curtain how to tote a bat and play baseball.

Dizzy Dean

#81. Baseball can be slow in many ways. The action starts with when the pitcher delivers the ball. But the action really starts when the crack of the bat happens.

Cal Ripken Jr.

#82. Traditionally, baseball punishes preening. In a society increasingly tolerant of exhibitionism, it is splendid when a hitter is knocked down because in his last at bat he lingered at the plate to admire his home run.

George Will

#83. It was one at bat during October 1975 that defined his [Joe Morgan's] place in baseball history and secured the legacy of the Big Red Machine, all with one swing.

Tucker Elliot

#84. I don't care where you are, but the fans only remember your last time at bat.

Mike Ditka

#85. My instinct is a winning coach, and when it said "Batter up,"I didn't argue that I wasn't ready for the game. I gripped the bat in both hands, assumed the stance, and said a prayer to Mickey Mantle.

Dean Koontz

#86. Phrases and images from the game filtered through his head... hitting the sweet spot, working the rosin bag, over the bat, going deep, in the hole, double header, baseball was a filthy, dirty sport!

J.D. Ruskin

#87. I hated to bat against Drysdale. After he hit you he'd come around, look at the bruise on your arm and say, 'Do you want me to sign it?'

Mickey Mantle

#88. The way he's swinging the bat, he won't get a hit until the 20th century.

Jerry Coleman

#89. A brilliant idea without action is like Mark McGwire playing baseball without a bat.

Jack Canfield

#90. Young man, if that bat comes down, you're out of the game

Bill Klem