A Guy Lying Quotes

#1. In the forensic science course I took at university they used photographs of dead bodies. For ballistics they showed us a guy lying on the floor, and his head had burst.

Denise Mina

#2. There's a bit of a difference between a guy lying back being all sexy and come hither and mmrowr-worthy, and a man who has a toy stuffed parrot hanging from his nips.

Katie MacAlister

#3. Dex isn't a big guy by any means. He's on the short side and toned but still thin. But he has unpredictable pit-bull tactics and one hell of a lippy attitude with strangers. For heaven's sake, never give that man a shovel.

Karina Halle

#4. And he's alone there, with the unconscious pilot lying a little way off for company, and some other guy he's never even seen, only spoken to over the radio.
He wants to sleep so badly - dying they call it - and he can't. Something's bothering him to keep him awake. ("Jane Brown's Body")

Cornell Woolrich

#5. To lie about a far country is easy

Guy De Maupassant

#6. I sometimes joke that when I die, my tombstone will say, 'Here lies the guy who hired Jonathan Ive,'

Robert Brunner

#7. If Jesus didn't rise from the dead, an even greater miracle happened: 12 relatively uneducated guys changed the world and were martyred to protect a lie.

Mark Hart

#8. You show me a lazy prick who's lying in bed all day, watching TV, only occasionally getting up to piss, and I'll show you a guy who's not causing any trouble.

George Carlin

#9. I had to be the only person on the planet capable of pissing off every guy in my life on the same day while managing to get them to all lie to each other - while lying to them my self.

Stormy Smith

#10. Ask any guy if sex is important in a relationship and the one who says no is lying. I just haven't met that guy yet. When you meet him, let's get him in to the Smithsonian - he's that special and rare.

Steve Harvey

#11. I had to break up with my last girlfriend for lying about being raped by her neighbor. But I've met her neighbor, he's a cool guy. Not like her other creepy ass neighbor though ...

Anthony Jeselnik

#12. Let me repeat that in case you missed it:
ALL GUYS TALK TO THEIR FRIENDS ABOUT SEX.
If a guy tells you he doesn't? Dump him, because he's lying to you.

Emma Chase

#13. Keep it up, wise guy. I'm always going to be taller than you once you're lying unconscious on the ground.

Jim Butcher

#14. If four or five guys tell you that you're drunk, even though you know you haven't had a thing to drink, the least you can do is to lie down a little while.

Joseph M. Schenck

#15. These guys [Republicans] are the most crooked, you know, lying group I've ever seen.

John F. Kerry

#16. Jean Laffite was a sexy bad boy with a gentleman's manners and an air of barely suppressed danger. Every girl's secret dreamboat in other words. We always say we want a nice, hardworking, decent guy but we're lying to ourselves. - DJ Jaco

Suzanne Johnson

#17. If I'm just The Guy With Norah, that's cool. Right now, that's all I want to be. All the other things I am - they're too complicated. I can feel them lying in wait, planning their return.

Rachel Cohn

#18. It is heartbreaking to me that I wasn't told the truth. I'm a very loyal guy, and I expect loyalty in return. And lying to me is not an exhibition of loyalty.

Chris Christie

#19. And everyday I read the paper, there's another lie. They show my picture for the crimes of another guy.

Tupac Shakur

#20. Underneath the visible problems with reading and writing lies the deeper problem of 'illearnacy': an acquired disabling of learning courage and learning initiative.

Guy Claxton

#21. So is this a habit of yours, leaving your bag behind in order te strike up a conversation?" He grinned and nodded at the bench where I had been sitting. Lying beneath it was my book bag. "Wouldn't it be easier to just walk up to a guy and say hello?

Amy Plum

#22. When a guy says "I have no idea what you're talking about" it means "I'm thinking of exactly what you're saying I did while I lie to you."

Dane Cook

#23. I've seen elbows that broke eye sockets. I've seen a German goalkeeper just level a French guy. His teammates thought he was dead lying on the ground. This was in 1982 at my first World Cup. But a bite is outside any kind of contact collision: dirty foul play. A bite is a bite.

George Vecsey

#24. If a guy's ever telling you a four-hour sex story with a straight face, just feel sorry for him. Not for lying to you, but for lying to himself. As a matter of fact, stop him right in the middle of the story and just hug him. Nine times out of ten he'll just break down and cry. He knows you know.

Ray Romano

#25. I cried when I watched 'The Notebook' for the first time. Any guy who tells you they didn't cry when they watched 'The Notebook's just lying.

Scott Eastwood

#26. I always wanted to be the last guy on Earth, just to see if all those women were lying to me.

Ronnie Shakes

#27. The problem a guy who lies all the time faces is he never can tell when anybody else is telling the truth.

Deacon Jones

#28. You have nothing if you're texting a guy in a relationship. We can text six women a minute. We can text it and push 'reply all.' I mean, since we're lying, we might as well lie to everybody.

Steve Harvey

#29. I've been so lazy all my life. I used to literally lie on the couch, up until the age of 35, fearing that my bones were dissolving like sugar cubes, from disuse.

Guy Maddin

#30. In the beginning I had women problems, 'cause you know, I represent for the guys. But I was actin' a fool, whilin' out. I'm not sayin' I don't while out anymore. I'm not gonna lie to you.

Wyclef Jean

#31. And it's not like I've never jacked off. I'm fifteen years old. Of course I do it. Any guy who says he doesn't is lying. That would be like having the coolest video game ever and never playing it. No one's that stupid.

Michael Thomas Ford