Wife Shopping Quotes

#1. I've got four women in my house - my wife and my three daughters - and I tell you what, it's pretty scary. I keep my head down and if we're out shopping I try and look in a man's shop while they make their minds up.

Ian Holloway

#2. Hear my wife speak of John Lewis and you might picture a stately pleasure dome of ornamental cascades and hanging gardens, staffed by muscular Centaurs who know all there is to know about kitchenware and soft furnishings. But really it's just a big hall full of wanky chrome fridges.

Tim Moore

#3. Don't always refuse to go shopping with your wife. Of course it's a nuisance, but sometimes she honestly wants your advice, and you ought to be pleased to give it.

Blanche Ebbutt

#4. My wife has a black belt in shopping.

Henny Youngman

#5. Grocery shopping was intimidating...the aisles were filled with everything from jumbo to miniature travel-sized rations. Who could I call to ask, "Does the size even matter?" I dare not ask my ex-wife.

Tez Brooks

#6. You were going to take me bikini shopping?" "Not me, dear. Patsy. I'm not interested in looking at curvy young women in bikinis. I'm deeply in love with my wife and I'm only interested in money.

Nick Hornby

#7. As regards the DF 4000 Deluxe X-ray body scanner we were discussing, please be assured, I have never known a case of a husband using it to track down shopping parcels hidden about his wife's person.

Sophie Kinsella

#8. My wife and I were shopping for the whole family. In the music department my wife said, "Let's get your nephew a set of drums. That's what your brother did to us last year."

Milton Berle

#9. Cause my wife gets up and goes shopping.

James Garner

#10. So how did you manage to lose Lunsdorf?"
"He got away from Sergeant Roberts in Harrods."
"I sometimes wish I could do that when shopping with my wife," said the cabinet secretary.

Jeffrey Archer