Stern's Quotes

#1. In my day, when you called on a girl, her mother was always hollering down to see if she was still unraped, the maid would look in, her father would shuffle his feet in another room. Today the boy calls up, says, 'Meet you at the back door of Stern's.'

Frank Crowninshield

#2. I remember draft night, I shook David Stern's hand while rocking a red suit with white pinstripes and red gators I've always been a trendsetter.

Jalen Rose

#3. The seven marvels that best represent man's achievements over the last 2,000 years will be determined by Internet vote ... so look for Howard Stern's Private Parts to come in No. 1.

Jon Stewart

#4. From 1985 to 1994, I lived in Manhattan in a big old loft right off Times Square. I could walk to work, which was in a couple of Broadway theaters, to Howard Stern's studio, and to 30 Rock for 'Letterman' and 'SNL.' Even in New York, walking to work is homey and folksy, like living in a small town.

Penn Jillette

#5. There's a fine mascara line between genius and insanity

Josh Stern

#6. Every rule has an exception, and it's usually remedial

Josh Stern

#7. There's a few in our history, where the person who creates it becomes almost the product itself. Jobs is one of those.

Joshua Michael Stern

#8. Nobody ever cares what I say! I feel badly about it, I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings.

Marnie Stern

#9. Radio is more powerful the closer we mimic the way we actually speak to each other. That's why Howard Stern is such a great radio talent. People on his show are actually speaking to each other. You might not like what they're saying, but they're real conversations.

Ira Glass

#10. Here's what happens when you die
you sit in a box and get eaten by worms. I guarantee you that when you die, nothing cool happens.

Howard Stern

#11. Lightning Bolt and Hella are two bands I listen to, and there's a lot of finger tapping going on there.

Marnie Stern

#12. I have real fears for Cuba based on the South American experience. Where you have had such a stern regime, as Fidel's [Castro], there is no culture of politics.

John Gimlette

#13. You like some things, you don't like others. It doesn't mean there's anything wrong with the others, it just means you have an opinion.

Marnie Stern

#14. You were spying on me?" I repeated, this time my tone was stern.
"Nonsense! I was making sure you were safe." He answered, fluttering his wings and landing in front of me. "That's what friends do.

Grace Fiorre

#15. There's always someone we'd love to kill, the trick is to make it not look like an accident

Josh Stern

#16. The fools standpoint is that all social institutions are games. He sees the whole world as game playing. That's why, when people take their games seriously and take on stern and pious expressions, the fool gets the giggles because he knows that it is all a game.

Alan Watts

#17. Never borrow trouble, the payback's a bitch

Josh Stern

#18. Nature's stern discipline enjoins mutual help at least as often as warfare. The fittest may also be the gentlest.

Theodosius Dobzhansky

#19. People look at me weird because I'm a Howard Stern fan, but he's very misunderstood. It's the first thing I do when I get in my car at a tournament - just pray that I get Howard 100 on Sirius or XM.

Keegan Bradley

#20. It's a kind of liberation to break free in language, if you can break free, but it's also a confinement, because form confines you - whatever the form.

Gerald Stern

#21. Love is universal and freely given, yet the ego insists that it be owned, that it obey the ego's stern dictates of when, how and where. In this, the ego will forever fail, for it is fighting the wrong battle. Love can never be limited or exist in separation or isolation.

Maharishi Sadasiva Isham

#22. I think it's ... I don't want to become a social crusader on this issue, but I think sports, male sports, has traditionally not been an inviting environment for gay men to identify themselves. But eventually ... we will get to a place where it is not an issue in sports.

David Stern

#23. I would say the referees have the toughest game to call. I would say that there's a lot of officiating done by announcers, local announcers. Sometimes you should listen to a game from both feeds, and you'd think you were listening to completely different games.

David Stern

#24. When you're out in the wilderness and get back to base camp only to discover sleeping bag turndown service ... .that's no chocolate on the pillow

Josh Stern

#25. Though Duty's face is stern, her path is best: They sweetly sleep who die upon her breast.

Henry Abbey

#26. No," Threepio responded, "I don't think he likes you at all." A second beep failed to alter the stern tone in the taller robot's voice. "No, I don't like you, either.

George Lucas

#27. I have no doubt that my M.B.A. from New York University's Stern School of Business was one of the best investments I ever made. It helped me climb the corporate ladder and become an entrepreneur.

Vivek Wadhwa

#28. I'm aware that the World Cup is probably the greatest spectacle in the world of sport, and that's despite the referees that have been found to have fixed games specifically.

David Stern

#29. If it's the thought that counts, then ignorance must use a calculator

Josh Stern

#30. It's okay for a man to commit adultery if his wife is ugly.

Howard Stern

#31. On Roger's jacket. Claire sat in the stern, blinking, but still

Diana Gabaldon

#32. Ah, there's the governess voice. All stern and disapproving. It makes me feel like a naughty schoolboy.

Lisa Kleypas

#33. While Sex without love is shallow, it's so profoundly uncomplicated

Josh Stern

#34. I've been trying to come to terms with what I am and what I do and what I believe in. And I see that I'm not happy with - well, it's almost as if being a poet is not enough for me. It's too late for me to do more now. I did what I could in a small way. I did it as theater, too, to be honest.

Gerald Stern

#35. What did I expect, that you would wrap my rib cage with those enormous hands in which horses must be measured, lifting me overhead with the stern reproach that is every Western woman's sly delight, "You're too thin"?

Lionel Shriver

#36. I am completely turning into my mom. Me, trying to be stern, is her. Or when I make silly voices. My mom always uses weird voices if she's talking to a kid or a dog. I'm the same person - completely my mother.

Eve

#37. Smart drafting is a wonderful thing. A smart free-agent signing is a wonderful thing. Smart trades are a wonderful thing, and that's a function of management.

David Stern

#38. Anyone can spin a victory, it's a total loss that demands creativity

Josh Stern

#39. There are men in the world who derive as stern an exaltation from the proximity of disaster and ruin, as others from success.

Winston S. Churchill

#40. Everyone knows that if you can keep on making money, everyone's happy.

David Stern

#41. I grew up in an age where women's tennis did not have similar prizes to men, and they played in complete obscurity, really, compared to the men's game.

David Stern

#42. [On The Catcher in the Rye] "This Salinger, he's a short story guy. And he knows how to write about kids. This book though, it's too long. Gets kind of monotonous. And he should've cut out a lot about these jerks and all that crumby school. They depress me. - James Stern

The New York Times

#43. In 1972, I signed a union card for SEIU. And for the last 38 years, 14 as president, it's been my life. I've seen the most miraculous, spectacular things. But there's a time to learn, a time to lead and a time to leave.

Andy Stern

#44. Workers of the world unite. It's not just a slogan anymore.

Andy Stern

#45. The union is much more than me, and when you think the union is you and it's not about who you represent, I think you've sort of lost your morals and focus and the purpose of your leadership.

Andy Stern

#46. Labels want to capture a certain market of kids and blah blah blah, and it's true, I just never think about that stuff. It's all part of a chain that's moving along, but this phase of music has to switch.

Marnie Stern

#47. Don't be so hard on yourself ... that's what a loofah's for

Josh Stern

#48. You can be stern and forthright, and that's my management style, but when you lose it totally, that's a sign of weakness.

Jon Huntsman Jr.

#49. Time's stern tide, with cold Oblivion's wave, Shall soon dissolve each fair, each fading charm.

Anna Seward

#50. It seems to me, that's the only thing that ends up being really fulfilling or satisfying - your career.

Marnie Stern

#51. I hear Amy Schumer on Howard Stern, and I think, "I wish there was a movie that starred her, because she's so interesting," and then at some point I go, "I guess I have to get involved, because it's not happening right now. Maybe I should help try to make that happen."

Judd Apatow

#52. I thought you said you dislocated Selene's shoulder!"" Sonny called to Cait, who'd tumbled for safety into the black water behind the stern of the boat.
""I did! I guess someone elserelocated it!"" she shouted back.

Lesley Livingston

#53. People have asked me, 'Is it about Apple or is it about Jobs?' and I say it's about how a man becomes his company and the company becomes the man. That has only happened a few times, like it happened with Ford, I think, they became inextricably linked together.

Joshua Michael Stern

#54. It's easy to be a spokesman and ambassador for a great organization like the NBA. I thank Commissioner David Stern for putting that trust in me to serve the NBA around the globe.

Dikembe Mutombo

#55. Mind-mother in Eddie's head spoke up at once, her voice as stern and commanding as the voice of a traffic cop: Don't you dare do it, Eddie! Don't you dare! Wet feet, that's one way - one of the thousands of ways - that colds start,

Stephen King

#56. People talk, 'Oh your father's a misogynist, look what he said about women,' like, on 'Howard Stern.' When he gets with Howard Stern, who's a friend of his, he'll joke around, because it's a comedy show. He's allowed to have a personality.

Donald Trump Jr.

#57. It's not that I'm ahead of my time, it's more that the world is running late

Josh Stern

#58. It's strictly coincidental that Pluto of course was named for the god of the underworld and we're describing these Halloween moons

Alan Stern

#59. I've come to appreciate other people's talents.

Howard Stern

#60. Maybe being an artist is a kind of detachment. You're in the cave, you're isolated, you're apart from everything and it's there you can find out what you believe in, or what is - what is the nature of being, as you see it.

Gerald Stern

#61. She says the design's damned near idiot proof." The stern rose and fell. "Did something just go poink?" Torin asked. "Because, generally, that's not a good sound.

Tanya Huff

#62. When you've got insane drums and a lot of guitar, it's really hard to mix the vocals, to mix it all well.

Marnie Stern

#63. One thing that's good about procrastination is that you always have something planned for tomorrow

Gladys Bronwyn Stern

#64. My own basketball background was ripping up my ACL in a lawyer's league.

David Stern

#65. We need a system where all of our teams have the opportunity to compete and to make a few dollars. That's not a bad desire for collective bargaining for a sports league, and it's great for our fans.

David Stern

#66. All I can say is you don't know what's going to be on the front page of tomorrow's newspaper. So I take no joy in what happens to another sport, whether it's about a perfect game or an issue of conduct.

David Stern

#67. To me that's what Jobs was about. He said at the end of the movie, 'When you realize that the world was created by people no smarter than you, your life will change.' That, to me, is a message for right now and people figuring out what they're going to do with themselves.

Joshua Michael Stern

#68. When my father is stern, no one chastises him. I don't think it's fair that when I act similarly, I'm seen as cruel. I'm making a huge decision, and I'm trying to be wise about it.

Kiera Cass

#69. Don't ask yourself, "Who's Right?" Ask yourself, "Do I like being treated this way?

Robin Stern

#70. They dissolved when I tried to inspect them, or dimmed, or slid dizzyingly away, like a ship's stern yawing down the dark lee slope of a wave.

Annie Dillard

#71. It's not hard to fail ... it's hard to accept you failed ... but once that's out of the way, it's pretty smooth sailing

Josh Stern

#72. I've come to realize we're all two different people. Our younger, innocent self that's inevitably mangled along the highway of life, and our tougher adult personal that evolves from the wreckage.

Phil Stern

#73. There's not a lot of other stuff I admire about his content, but there's something about Howard Stern and his perseverance in a very difficult industry. He does tickle me in certain ways with humor.

Ashleigh Banfield

#74. My father's generation's crisis was fighting fascism. Ours is fighting climate change. It is much harder because you can't see it, it is not an obvious threat. But the solution is in our hands.

Nicholas Stern

#75. It's very important that there should be cross-fertilisation between government and academia. Both parties can benefit from having a better understanding of how the other works.

Nicholas Stern

#76. Obama's stern demeanor punctuated by intermittent flashes of his wide, relaxing smile is his greatest weapon in defusing pent-up angst.

Tina Brown

#77. Meat is a wasteful use of water and creates a lot of greenhouse gases. It puts enormous pressure on the world's resources. A vegetarian diet is better.

Nicholas Stern

#78. You can mythologize Steve Jobs, but really in the end, he was a kid from the Valley, with his funny little friends, and they made something. That's all he was.

Joshua Michael Stern

#79. Most of the time, I get auditions for deaf characters where the scene has them communicating in really convoluted ways, like reading lips from across the room when the other person's back is turned or having other people parrot what they say.

Shoshannah Stern

#80. Music is the thousandth of a millisecond between one note and another; how you get from one to the other-that's where the music is.

Isaac Stern

#81. Death is life's way of telling you, you've been recalled

Josh Stern

#82. I wish you had fucked her. Then you'd know. Then you'd know the sublime ... Her asshole, for example. It's like a stern coquettish spoiled secretary working for Himmler -

Glen Duncan

#83. Taking pains, working hard, not flaunting his or her chops so much as relying on them, the pop artisan teeters on a fine fulcrum between the stern, sell-the-product morality of the workhorse and the artist's urge to discover a pattern in, or derive a meaning from, the random facts of the world.

Michael Chabon

#84. New York is the dirtiest, largest, ugliest, broken-down city in the world-but it's the only one.

Isaac Stern

#85. I'm playing chess while everyone else is playing checkers, that's why I always lose

Josh Stern

#86. Our elections are free-it's in the results where eventually we pay.

Bill Stern

#87. When you enter the Lions Den, it's best not to go empty-handed or you'll probably leave that way

Josh Stern

#88. To claim the World Bank is just an extension of U.S. foreign policy is just wrong.

Nicholas Stern

#89. All the world's a stage and I'm just going through a phase

Josh Stern

#90. When nothing seems worth the effort - said some stern voice in her mind - it's a screen to hide a wish that's worth too much; what do you want?

Ayn Rand

#91. Man could not stay there forever. He was bound to spread to new regions, partly because of his innate migratory tendency and partly because of Nature's stern urgency.

Ellsworth Huntington

#92. 'The New York Times' list is a bunch of crap. They ought to call it the editor's choice. It sure isn't based on sales.

Howard Stern

#93. I never go out, ever. And I think that's why I've been craving human connection so badly, and in a way, I'm excited to go on tour to be around people all the time.

Marnie Stern

#94. I thought, writing is everything, it's so much more important than this or that. If only I could give that young man a stern talking to. Having a child changes things quite a bit.

Matthew Specktor

#95. If the hill has its own name, then it's probably a pretty tough hill.

Marty Stern

#96. A captain should know the details of every position in his ship's company by working them with his own hands, stem to stern. It's the only way to be sure you know what each man needs from his captain in order to be able to perform his duty.

Jim Butcher

#97. It's no treat being in bed with me.

Howard Stern

#98. If the second date seems to be going well, it's pretty much a given that by dessert I'll renounce my faith

Josh Stern

#99. We all get one life to live here. It's 2012, and for gay and lesbian couples who are in love, not to be able to be married is so absurd.

Howard Stern

#100. I have to say, though, it's a little strange doing both because Durant is very straight and stern and austere.

Corbin Bernsen