Quotes About Dad Jokes

#1. Today's all burnt toast, running late and Dad jokes, has anybody seen my left shoe? Close my eyes, take a bite, grab a ride, laugh-out-loud, there it is up on the roof.

Bridgit Mendler

#2. I'm a goof. I talk too much. I tell stories. I tell cheesy Dad jokes. I'm theatrical and I'll mix things up and I'll surprise people. Those are the things that I just do because that's who I am.

William Beckett

#3. There is not a racist bone in my dad's body. He doesn't even laugh at distasteful jokes.

Alan Wilson

#4. They tried to pierce your heart with a Morgul-knife which remains in the wound. If they had succeeded, you would have become like they are, only weaker and under their command. You would have became a wraith under the dominion of the Dark Lord.

J.R.R. Tolkien

#5. In some countries, of course, Spanish is the language spoken in public. But for many American children whose families speak Spanish at home, it becomes a private language. They use it to keep the English-speaking world at bay.

Richard Rodriguez

#6. Coordinating our efforts and sharing information and expertise is a great way to step up our fight against violent criminals. We are determined to make Ontario communities safer for law abiding citizens.

Julian Fantino

#7. There's no such thing as a superhuman. But the only thing I got to tell you, if you take a dog and kick him around he's got to be alert, he's got to be more sharper than you. Well, we've been kicked around for two thousand years. We're not more smarter, we're more alert.

Mordecai Richler

#8. I think 'Family Guy' and 'American Dad' have definitely staked out their own style and territory, and now the accusations are coming that 'The Simpsons' is taking jokes from 'Family Guy.' And I can tell you, that ain't the case.

Matt Groening

#9. term gains and all short term capital gains are taxable to investors. Please refer to the Taxation - Capital gain for more details.

Jigar Patel

#10. Most species of dragons had retired or, mistaken for dinosaurs, collectively hung their bones in museums, waiting in the wings for just the right time to reemerge, to scorch schools and char church parking lots.

Tom Cardamone

#11. What's interesting about subscribing to a life of giving is that you become addicted.

Mary Kay Ash

#12. There is no need for hell fire in hell. Hell is other people.

Jean-Paul Sartre

#13. It was never important for a wedding to be about anything other than me and my partner. A big celebration was never my cup of tea.

Mandy Moore

#14. The shouting came to a halt, replaced by a tense silence that hung in the air like a fog on a cold winter morning. The

Nicolajayne Taylor

#15. I think in my case, I had no choice but to have a good sense of humor. I grew up with my dad, Danny Thomas, and George Burns and Bob Hope and Milton Berle and Sid Caesar and all those guys were at our house all the time and telling jokes and making each other laugh.

Marlo Thomas

#16. Persistence, persistence, persistence. I'm surprised how few entrepreneurs follow up.

Mark Suster

#17. Real knowledge, true knowledge, comes from knowing why.

Thomas Lewis

#18. You shouldn't be ashamed of your pain. You have the right to have your pain treated.

Naomi Judd

#19. My dad doesn't get any of my jokes. He laughs at them, but he doesn't understand them. He's just laughing because people around him are laughing.

Zach Galifianakis

#20. Simply put, the best revenge is to live an awesome life.

Ramon Bautista

#21. I'm probably going to get in trouble for this but 'American Dad' is one of my favourite shows. It gets very dark in places but the jokes are there.

Donald Glover

#22. Lend's dad, two werewolves, and a vampire. It was like the setup to a bad joke or something. A doctor, two werewolves, and a vampire walk into a bar. "What'll you have?" the bartender asks. "We were thinking him," the vampire answers, eyeing the doctor.
Okay, jokes weren't my strong point.

Kiersten White