Prostate Quotes

#1. It only takes a tenth grade course on evolution to know that the prostate g-spot's existence alone is proof that ass play has been done for a very, very long time.

Maggie Young

#2. I've got a prostate the size of a honeydew and a head full of bad memories.

Jerry Stiller

#3. Prostate cancer represents a full third of all cancer incidence in men - sixfold that of leukemia and lymphoma.

Siddhartha Mukherjee

#4. Do you know who will be in charge of health care? The IRS. You thought getting audited was bad? Wait until your next prostate exam.

Jay Leno

#5. Men with the highest dairy intakes had approximately double the risk of total prostate cancer,

T. Colin Campbell

#6. Hell, we spent $200 Billion to get a scared guy who needed a shave out of a fox-hole! And he may even die of prostate cancer before we even get a chance to try him, dammit!

Ted Turner

#7. Broccoli is incredible. It can prevent DNA damage and metastatic cancer spread; activate defences against pathogens and pollutants; help to prevent lymphoma; boost the enzymes that detox your liver; target breast cancer stem cells; and reduce the risk of prostate cancer progression.

Michael Greger

#8. You need a prostate to understand," I said.

Jim Butcher

#9. I would like to hear Elliot Carter's Fourth String Quartet, if only to discover what a cranky prostate does to one's polyphony.

James Sellars

#10. 'Early stages' is when the cancer is completely contained within the prostate. If it is detected when the cancer is entirely in the gland, the chance for full recovery is at its highest.

Len Dawson

#11. More than once he'd wandered into a brothel and left only when they threw him out with an emptied account, a sore groin, and a prostate as dry as the Sahara desert.

James S.A. Corey

#12. For the husband, the male prostate can only be accessed through the anus. It is called the "male G-spot" as it is reportedly a source of great pleasure when stroked by such things as a wife's finger.

Mark Driscoll

#13. My girlfriend's dad runs the Prostate Centre on Wimpole St. in London, and he's chairman of Prostate U.K., which I think is the second-largest prostate cancer charity in Britain.

Christian Cooke

#14. I began seeing my wife, Kathleen, while I was undergoing treatment for prostate cancer.

Ken Venturi

#15. And lose my cock, balls and prostate? Are you kidding me? Honey, I'm still all man. I'm just a man with decoration, Tommy had explained before turning with a flounce and practically floating out of the room in his heels.

Vicktor Alexander

#16. The moment the doctor said he wanted to do a biopsy, in my heart I thought I'd probably got it. But I also know a lot of people who have also had prostate cancer, so I had a reasonably good idea what to expect.

Andrew Lloyd Webber

#17. The mans prostate was so encased by the tumour that doctors couldn't even see it. The tumour was wrapped around the gland ... when he started out his PSA was ... around 5,000 ... it eventually normalised ... and he is alive and well now..and I think his PSA count is like 3 or 4.

Richard M. Schulze

#18. You've been through my stuff. I bent over and let one of you stick the world's longest finger up my ass. If a prostate check is an exam, that was a motherfucking safari. I was scared to look down. I thought I'd see that guy's fingernail sticking out of my cock.

Stephen King

#19. The four most common cancers that account for about 80 percent of all cancer deaths are lung, breast, colorectal cancer, and prostate cancer.

Laurie Glimcher

#20. Sorry, but retirement offends me. You don't just stop fighting in the middle of a war because your legs hurt. So why do you get to stop working in the middle of your life just because your prostate hurts? That's desertion.

Stephen Colbert

#21. I wonder why bigots think their conservative and puritanical version of 'God' made the male body with a prostate gland that also co-incidentally 'just happens' to be a 'g-spot'?

Christina Engela

#22. As a supporter of the Prostate Cancer Foundation and their Home Run Challenge program, I am extremely grateful for the valuable partnerships and relationships built with Major League Baseball and our affiliates.

Joe Torre

#23. The prostate might as well have been a mythological creature like a unicorn or Leprechaun only acknowledged through whispery giggles among women brunching with their gay friends.

Maggie Young

#24. The idea is to encourage men to go with their wives and screen. So, if the wife is going to go and do her screening, then the man can go and do his baseline screening, too. Men need to be aware of the health of their bodies, as well - prostate cancer and breast cancer are almost on the same level.

Olivia Newton-John

#25. Probably the most violently hated of the weenie songs cited in the survey was "Sometimes When We Touch," sung in a very emotional manner by Dan Hill, who sounds as though he's having his prostate examined by Captain Hook.

Dave Barry

#26. When testosterone levels are low, vitamin D potentiates abnormal prostate tissue growth.

Stephen Harrod Buhner

#27. We can reduce these cancer rates - breast cancer, prostate cancer, colon cancer - by 90 percent or more by people adopting what I call a nutritrarian diet.

Joel Fuhrman

#28. Please let Georgie have given you the world's greatest prostate tickle and convinced you that Raahosh and I need to be together.

Ruby Dixon

#29. Major League Baseball has prostate awareness for two weeks leading up to Father's Day, and I want to get involved in that.

Steve Garvey

#30. African-American women who develop breast cancer are more likely to die from the disease than White women of the same age. Survival rates are worse among African-Americans for colon, prostate and ovarian cancers as well.

Frank C. Garland

#31. I was in Vietnam, and I was exposed to Agent Orange. And there's a high relationship between people that were exposed to Agent Orange and the kind of lymphoma that I had. The prostate cancer was genetic in my family. My father had prostate cancer, my - three of my four uncles had prostate cancer.

Hamilton Jordan

#32. I have heard of people dying from prostate cancer, and they are the unlucky ones, the people who didn't know they had got it, and it went on the rampage.

Ian McKellen

#33. Men need to be aware of the health of their bodies, as well - prostate cancer and breast cancer are almost on the same level. It's fascinating to me that the correlation between the two is almost the same - people don't talk about it so much, but they are almost equal in numbers.

Olivia Newton-John

#34. I finally had my prostate checked. And I was super-thankful that I taught my asshole to whistle before the doctor stuck his finger in there. The look on his face was priceless.

Ryan Reynolds

#35. Why hasn't anyone ever told me the prostate was some kind of magical pleasure zone? Are there unicorns and orgasm fairies dancing around in there?

Sarina Bowen

#36. New rule: Stop calling it Obamacare. It's not like Obama will be the doctor for
your next prostate exam. That's just a common fantasy of Republican men.

Bill Maher

#37. Bill Murray is on the show tonight. Next week I'll be Goggling 'foods that improve prostate health.'

David Letterman

#38. Oh Jesus, hello prostate," he gasped.

Abigail Roux

#39. Since I came to the White House, I got two hearing aids, a colon operation, skin cancer, a prostate operation, and I was shot. The damn thing is, I've never felt better in my life.

Ronald Reagan

#40. A new medical study reports that men who eat ten pizzas a week are less likely to develop prostate problems at age 50. That's because they are usually dead by age 40.

Jay Leno

#41. There's a saying in my business that there are two kinds of coaches - those who have been fired and those who haven't been fired yet. That's kind of like prostate cancer. Every man will have it if he lives long enough.

Bobby Bowden

#42. A new report says that dogs can sniff out prostate cancer with almost 98 percent accuracy. The report also finds that cats can sniff it out with 100 percent accuracy but they prefer to watch you die.

Conan O'Brien

#43. We have Dragon [dictation software]," one primary care doctor said, "which you have to be careful of, because I just [dictated] 'Patient's prostate is bothering him' and it turned out 'Patient's prostitute is bothering him.

Robert Wachter

#44. I love you. The words are always right there on the tip of my naughty tongue. I swallow them back like I need to and say something much more practical instead. "Have you ever been acquainted with your prostate?

Sarina Bowen

#45. Since I came to the White House, I've gotten two hearing aids, had a colon operation, a prostate operation, skin cancer, and I've been shot ... damn thing is, I've never felt better.

Ronald Reagan

#46. I recently formed a foundation to raise awareness for prostate cancer. I feel it's very necessary that men be more aware about prostate cancer and their health in general.

Herbie Mann

#47. Ha. You have no idea how hard a guy gets off from a good prostate massage.

Elle Kennedy

#48. Touching you sounded less stalkerish than lying prostate on top of you.

Chelsea Fine

#49. Zane lifted his legs enough to wrap them around Ty again, changing the angle of Ty's thrusts, and he gave a long, forlorn cry as Ty hit his prostate. "Oh, God baby, so, so good." Ty

Abigail Roux

#50. Granted, prostate exams aren't the most enjoyable things in the world, but they only last about 10 seconds. It's well worth it. Just think of the possible consequences if you don't get it done.

Len Dawson

#51. I have charity work that I do. I started my own charity, the Friends of the Prostate, and I'm also working on awareness of the deviated septum. I do this because not many people are interested in it. There's also Save the Funnel-web - they're dying out.

Barry Humphries

#52. Don't you think the Gods put some thought into where they put the prostate gland?

Setona Mizushiro

#53. dairy intake is "one of the most consistent dietary predictors for prostate cancer in the published literature," and those who consume the most dairy have double to quadruple the risk.

T. Colin Campbell

#54. I am living proof that if you catch prostate cancer early, it can be reduced to a temporary inconvenience, and you can go back to a normal life.

Norman Schwarzkopf

#55. I had prostate cancer that, for me, was debilitating. I didn't touch a guitar for two years, but when I realized I was seeing the light at the end of the recovery tunnel and was going to live pain-free, I realized again that it was a fun little instrument to play.

Ronnie Montrose

#56. Most people seemed to rate the discovery of America pretty highly; I'd have to say that, for me, it paled into insignificance beside the discovery of my prostate.

J.L. Merrow

#57. He looked like a man on his way to a prostate exam.

Kathy Reichs

#58. If you are over seventy, and you don't have prostate cancer, chances are you're a woman.

Mark Scholz

#59. I have got prostate cancer, and I have to keep monitoring that. It's no problem, it's under control and I'm very cool about it, but other people are dying from it.

Ian McKellen

#60. I have had my television aerials removed. It is the moral equivalent of a prostate operation.

Malcolm Muggeridge

#61. My father's death from prostate cancer in 1993 was tragic. He never complained about pain. He was a fighter. By the time he was ready to die he wasn't able to die in the way that he wanted to, which seemed an outrage to me.

Zoe Wanamaker

#62. The male prostate gland was a mysterious and wonderful thing.

Travis Luedke

#63. What's PSA?" "Prostate test." "Prostate?" Cooper asked, looking a little miffed. "I hope he bought you dinner first.

N.R. Walker

#64. [Richard] remembered asking Tommy once why he didn't want to transition into a woman.
"And lose my cock, balls and prostate? Are you kidding me? Honey, I'm still all man. I'm just a man with decoration."
Tommy Wilkins, A Very Tate Christmas (Tate Pack #3)

Vicktor Alexander

#65. What are you going to do first when we get out of here?"

"Have a bath. What about you?"

"I'm torn between drinking, showering, and pizza."

"You're such a guy you might as well have said 'scratching my balls and getting my prostate examined'.

Eve Dangerfield

#66. You know its going to be a bad day when you are having a prostate examination and you feel both of your doctor's hands on your shoulders!

Michael Robotham