Peter Kay Quotes

#1. You never know where to look when eating a banana.

Peter Kay

#2. When I went to get my master's in creative writing at San Francisco State after Grinnell, I joined the moribund remnants of the Actor's Workshop, until I saw Kay Hayward and Sandy Archer in the San Francisco Mime Troupe and drove down that day to audition. The rest is history.

Peter Coyote

#3. The most painful household accident is wearing socks and stepping on an upturned plug.

Peter Kay

#4. Everyone had an uncle who tried to steal their nose.

Peter Kay

#5. Testimony requires the nurturing by the prayer of faith, the hungering for the word of God in the scriptures, and the obedience to the truth.

Henry B. Eyring

#6. Furthermore, there is no good ethical or economic reason for asking workmen and current producers to forego all economic gain in order to increase the purchasing power of all the wealth accumulated in past years.

Charles E. Wilson

#7. If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all the way down to the core of the earth?

Peter Kay

#8. We talked for hours. He talked and I listened.
It was like wind and sunlight. It blew all the cobwebs away.

John Fowles

#9. You ever dip your biscuit in your tea and it breaks? I swear now, you never get used to that.

Peter Kay

#10. Amarillio, just turn to the left and 500 yards down

Peter Kay

#11. The smaller the monkey the more it looks like it would kill you at the first given opportunity.

Peter Kay

#12. I once came back from a book tour where sleek black cars driven by nice men in black suits waited for me at every hotel, took me to every signing, brought me back, opened car doors for me. They were great. I was great. It was a wonderful tour.

MaryJanice Davidson

#13. I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.

Peter Kay

#14. The more you read and observe about this Politics thing,
you got to admit that each party is worse than the other.
The one that's out always looks the best

Will Rogers

#15. Heard a rumor you can't cook," he said.
She didn't look away from her reading. "You know rumors.
They're always true."
She had him there. According to some of the tabloids, he had fourteen love children, two with aliens and one with the sister of Bigfoot.

Jamie Farrell

#16. Is French kissing in France just called kissing?

Peter Kay

#17. Triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones.

Peter Kay

#18. Some days you see lots of people on crutches.

Peter Kay

#19. And I think that this, here, with James, will always be wrong but it will always be the right sort of wrong, because if we don't do this, no one will. We are a matched set of perfect liars, perfectly destroyed people, perfect for destruction.

Kiersten White

#20. Why does mineral water that 'has trickled through mountains for centuries' have a 'use by' date?

Peter Kay

#21. Old women with mobile phones look wrong.

Peter Kay

#22. The reason they don't make movies for adults and for people which are the largest bulge of the population is because they are not usually going to the movie the first weekend. They take a while to learn about it, probably word of mouth. It takes a lot of money to release a picture.

Rob Reiner

#23. To be honest, Peter Pan was one of those fairy tales that I sort of related to, and I think that's the case with a lot of kids. The whole idea of escapism really resonates with a lot of kids.

Robbie Kay

#24. It's impossible to look cool whilst picking up a Frisbee.

Peter Kay

#25. I think that marijuana makes you stupid but sensual. I've watched many of my friends and loved ones become more erotic and dumber - just going around with a glazed expression on their faces from their last orgasms to the next - and found them really quite boring.

Timothy Leary

#26. We measure the value of a civilized society by the number of Libraries it opens, not the number it closes down.

Philip Pullman

#27. I might be collecting wheely bins in 12 months time but at least they'll be wheely bins outside back gates that I know, in a part of the country that I love. There's no place like home!

Peter Kay

#28. If you can't read, it's going to be hard to realize dreams.

Booker T. Washington

#29. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp no one would eat?

Peter Kay

#30. No one knows the origins of their metal coat hangers.

Peter Kay

#31. Garlic bread, it's the future, I've tasted it

Peter Kay

#32. There's no panic like the panic you momentarily feel when your hand or head is stuck in something.

Peter Kay

#33. The nation had had two symbols of solitude, the forest and the prairies; now it had a third, the mountains.

Bernard DeVoto

#34. It's human nature to find patterns where there are none and to find skill where luck is a more likely explanation (particularly if you're the lucky manager).

William J. Bernstein

#35. I'm not homophobic. I'm not scared of my house.

Peter Kay

#36. One of the most awkward things that can happen in a pub is when your pint-to-toilet cycle gets synchronised with a complete stranger.

Peter Kay