Top 66 Most Absurd Sayings
#1. The Jews are of all peoples the grosses, the most ferocious, the most fanatical, and the most absurd.
Voltaire
#2. Women are strange little beasts,' he said to Dr. Coutras. 'You can treat them like dogs, you can beat them till your arm aches, and still they love you.' He shrugged his shoulders. 'Of course, it is one of the most absurd illusions of Christianity that they have souls.
W. Somerset Maugham
#3. I had the most absurd nightmare. I was poor and no one liked me.
Dan Aykroyd
#4. Tell me", he wanted to say, "everything in the whole world" - for he had the wildest, most absurd, extravagant ideas about poets and poetry - but how to speak to a man who does not see you? who sees ogres, satyrs, perhaps the depth of the sea instead?
Virginia Woolf
#5. I think that our form of government is certainly the best - not that can be imagined - but that has ever been experienced; and, while we are sure that practice is in its favour, it would be most absurd to dream of destroying it on theory.
Charlotte Turner Smith
#6. But I know human nature, my friend, and I tell you that, suddenly confronted with the possibility of being tried for murder, the most innocent person will lose his head and do the most absurd things.
Agatha Christie
#7. People write a lot of similar material. That's why I try to come up with the most absurd jokes.
Daniel Tosh
#8. The idea that reason and rationality is somehow separate from and antithetical to ones ' heart' is one of the most absurd theologies I have ever in my life heard."
~R. Alan Woods ("Just Keeping It Real", Copyright 2012)
R. Alan Woods
#9. I think the media loves taking the most absurd clips for a sport that has become congressional politics.
Kal Penn
#10. Men," she said rueful, "are the most absurd creatures on this green earth." "But there are camels," Gabriel pointed out. "Believe me," she answered. "I've taken camels into consideration.
Zoe Archer
#11. Ours [religion] is without a doubt the most ridiculous, the most absurd, and the most bloody to ever infect the world.
Voltaire
#12. It is imperative that a woman keep her sense of humor intact and at the ready. She must see, even if only in secret, that she is the funniest, looniest woman in her world, which she should also see as being the most absurd world of all times.
Maya Angelou
#13. It's often the ideas that sound most absurd and counterintuitive at first that later cause fundamental shifts in the way we see the world.
Orson Scott Card
#14. After a lifetime in academia, I have discovered that there is only one requirement for someone to actually believe any of the one hundred most absurd ideas possible for a human mind to conceive: you must be an intellectual. Some ideas are so ridiculous that only a Ph.D. could believe them.
Peter Kreeft
#15. Sometimes we think people are like lottery tickets, that they're there to make our most absurd dreams come true.
Carlos Ruiz Zafon
#16. The most absurd and reckless aspirations have sometimes led to extraordinary success.
Luc De Clapiers
#17. The best mannered people make the most absurd lovers.
Denis Diderot
#18. This absurd, godless world is, then, peopled with men who think clearly and have ceased to hope. And I have not yet spoken of the most absurd character, who is the creator.
Albert Camus
#19. Since I was both an atheist and an absurdist, I had decided that the most absurd thing I could do would be to develop an intimate relationship with the God I didn't believe in.
Paul Krassner
#20. Fear is a distorting mirror in which anything can appear as a caricature of itself, stretched to terrible proportions; once inflamed, the imagination pursues the craziest and most unlikely possibilities. What is most absurd suddenly seems the most probable.
Stefan Zweig
#21. Positiveness is a most absurd foible. If you are in the right, it lessens your triumph; if in the wrong, it adds shame to your defeat.
Laurence Sterne
#22. After all the thousand times I've told you I love you, how could you let one word break your faith in me? ... I could see it in your eyes, that you honestly believed that I didn't want you anymore. The most absurd, ridiculous concept - as if there were any way that I could exist without needing you!
Stephenie Meyer
#23. His urbane brain cut the most magnificent capers, as, chloroformed by fatigue, it directed its incoming perceptions along the most absurd paths and enjoyed the utter senselessness of its associations.
Gerhard Roth
#24. You know, I always was an early morning or late night writer. Early morning was my favorite; late night was because you had a deadline. And at four in the morning you make up some of your most absurd jokes.
Joss Whedon
#25. Christianity is the most ridiculous, the most absurd, and bloody religion that has ever infected the world.
[In a letter to Frederick the Great]
Voltaire
#26. That thing of hell and eternal punishment is the most absurd, as well as the most disagreeable thought that ever entered into the head of mortal man.
George Berkeley
#27. It is, in truth, the most absurd of all suppositions, that a human being can be educated, or even nourished and brought up, without imbibing numberless prejudices from every thing which passes around him.
Anna Letitia Barbauld
#28. Most of the basic truths of life sound absurd at first hearing.
Elizabeth Goudge
#29. Maturity is often more absurd than youth and very frequently is most unjust to youth.
Thomas A. Edison
#30. Absurdity is one of the most human things about us: a manifestation of our most advanced and interesting characteristics.
Thomas Nagel
#31. Whoever considers the number of absurd and ridiculous oaths necessary to be taken at present in most countries, on being admitted into any society or profession whatever, will be less surprised to find prevarication still prevailing, where perjury has led the way.
Guillaume-Thomas Francois Raynal
#32. Killing for ideas is the most dangerous form of killing at all. Being willing to die for your ideas rather than your country is another concept, but dying for an idea, like in religion, is absurd.
Mick Jagger
#33. You have always told me it was Ernest. I have introduced you to every one as Ernest. You answer to the name of Ernest. You look as if your name was Ernest. You are the most earnest-looking person I ever saw in my life. It is perfectly absurd your saying that your name isn't Ernest.
Oscar Wilde
#34. I'm not the same person as the character I do in my songs. She's crazy! The 'Daddy Song' was the first sketch I ever wrote, especially on the guitar and everything - and definitely the most offensive. And absurd.
Carly Craig
#35. Since most of us have only given or received love in a conditioned or partial way, the idea that anyone or anything can be read like an open book may seemforeign or scary - or even fantastical and ridiculous, absurd and fallacious.
Catherine Carrigan
#36. Most people do not know what they are living for. Asking a question of the purpose of their existence would be an absurd thing to do merely on this account
Sunday Adelaja
#37. The more images I gathered from the past, I said, the more unlikely it seemed to me that the past had actually happened in this or that way, for nothing about it could be called normal: most of it was absurd, and if not absurd, then appalling.
W.G. Sebald
#38. Witchcraft is one of the most baseless, absurd, disgusting and silly of all the humbugs.
P.T. Barnum
#39. To talk of 'prizing her open' as if she were an oyster, to use any but the finest and subtlest and most pliable tools upon her was impious and absurd.
Virginia Woolf
#40. Religion and nationalism, as well as any custom and any belief however absurd and degrading, if it only connects the individual with others, are refuges from what man most dreads: isolation.
Erich Fromm
#41. Looking at the room, I can tell that you are the most beautiful girl in the room.
(In the whole wide room)
And when you're on the street
(Depending on the street)
I bet you are definitely in the top three
Flight Of The Conchords
#42. Evolution is among the most well-established theories in the scientific community. To doubt it sounds to biologists as absurd as denying relativity does to physicists.
Leonard Mlodinow
#44. Most Americans would agree that Plowshares is a Theatre of the Absurd.
Daniel Berrigan
#45. What for me is bliss and life and ecstasy and exaltation, the world in general seeks at most in imagination; in life it finds it absurd.
Hermann Hesse
#46. Movement, after all, seemed futile to him. He felt that imagination could easily be substituted for the vulgar realities of things. It was possible, in his opinion, to gratify the most extravagant, absurd desires by a subtle subterfuge, by a slight modification of the object of one's wishes.
Joris-Karl Huysmans
#47. Have you ever dreamt about doing something totally foolish, something so absurd that perhaps you were afraid to tell anyone except possibly those closest to you? I harbored such a secret for most of my adult life - I secretly wanted to hike the Appalachian Trail [A.T.] from Georgia to Maine.
Dennis R. Blanchard
#48. Painting someone's portrait is, of course, an impossible task. What an absurd idea to try and distil a human being, the most complex organism on the planet, into flicks, washes, and blobs of paint on a two-dimensional surface.
David Cobley
#49. If perfection is absurd, why is tragedy common?
John Most
#50. You rely too much on brain. The brain is the most overrated organ.
Woody Allen
#51. How absurd it was that in all seven kingdoms, the weakest and most vulnerable of people - girls, women - went unarmed and were taught nothing of fighting, while the strong were trained to the highest reaches of their skill.
Kristin Cashore
#52. Most of the time it is a good job and a good honour to fight against people's values, because most of the time people's values are irrational and absurd!
Mehmet Murat Ildan
#53. At the time we're stuck in it, like hostages locked in a Turkish bath, high school seems the most serious business in the world to just about all of us. It's not until the second or third class reunion that we start realizing how absurd the whole thing was.
Stephen King
#54. There's this absurd innate need in most men to feel that they're more powerful than women are, which is ridiculous.
Frederick Lenz
#55. If you accept a punitive notion of God, who punishes or even eternally tortures those who do not love him, then you have an absurd universe where most people on this earth end up being more loving than God!
Richard Rohr
#56. What absurd fellows you are, both of you! I wonder who it was defined man as a rational animal. It was the most premature definition ever given.
Oscar Wilde
#57. If one wants to live one is better to incline towards imbecility than intelligence, and live only in the absurd. Intelligence consists of eating stars and turning them into dung. And the universe, at the most optimistic estimate, is nothing but God's digestive system.
Blaise Cendrars
#58. Imagine how asleep or utterly unperceptive and clueless you would have to be not to see yourself as absurd for the most part.
John Malkovich
#59. It is absurd to talk of one animal being higher than another ... we consider those, where the intellectual faculties most developed as the highest. - A bee doubtless would [use] ... instincts as a criteria.
Charles Darwin
#60. The quality you most admire in a man? Courage moral and physical: 'anima' - the ability to think like a woman. Also a sense of the absurd.
The quality you most admire in a woman? Courage moral and physical: "anima" - the ability to visualize the mind and need of a man. Also a sense of the absurd.
Christopher Hitchens
#61. When I look back on my life nowadays, which I sometimes do, what strikes me most forcibly about it is that what seemed at the time most significant and seductive, seems now most futile and absurd.
Stephen R. Covey
#62. I lost the most precious thing a man can have: my faith in my fellow man. I laughed and I wept at God's irony, at the absurd way he had chosen to demonstrate to me that I was an instrument of Good and Evil.
Paulo Coelho
#63. Part of her soul ... gloried in the sheer bodacious unnaturalness of it. Putting a great blue-green water park smack down in the red desert complete with cactus, trading posts, genuine Navajo Indians, and five kinds of rattlesnakes was theater of the absurd at its most outrageous.
Nevada Barr
#64. Cultivate in young minds an equal love of the good, the beautiful and the absurd; most people's lives are too lead-colored to lose the smallest twinkle of light from a flash of nonsense.
Fanny Kemble
#65. Ridicule, the weapon of all others most feared by enthusiasts of every description, and which from its predominance over such minds, often checks what is absurd, and fully as often smothers that which is noble.
Walter Scott
#66. The most dangerous aspect of religion is its tendency to glorify the absurd and justify the abhorrent.
Stifyn Emrys
