Irony Humor Death Zombie Quotes

#1. So I told the lady Biology and high school were useless crap, I was going to get a job, and I was never coming back to school.
And I didn't.
Yeah, I sure showed them.

Diana Rowland

#2. When I was a young boy, during the aftermath of World War II, Germany was broken and in ruins. Many people were hungry, sick, and dying. I remember well the humanitarian shipments of food and clothing that came from the Church in Salt Lake City.

Dieter F. Uchtdorf

#3. I grabbed my napkin and managed to pretend to sneeze which had the added effect of covering up most of my face which was surely completely beet red with embarrassment at this point. Yeah, I was classy and suave like that. Jesus Christ, Angel, get a grip!

Diana Rowland

#4. But then again, I was about as far from touchy-feely as you could get. Unless you're fucking me, don't put your hands on me.

Diana Rowland

#5. As soon as he was gone I blew my breath out and leaned back against the wall. Awkward. First the cop who'd arrested me, then the paramedic who'd kept me from accidentally killing myself. I didn't even want to think what a third thing might be.

Diana Rowland

#6. I don't have kids, but in many ways I feel I've had them already. I don't want to say I raised my brothers - that sounds too strong - but actually I do feel like that a bit.

Meg Cabot

#7. Don't we all hope to die with a smile on our faces?

Jeff O'Brien

#8. The smell was like chocolate and cookies and biscuits and gravy and everything else that was delicious. It damn near drove me crazy every time I had to touch one. I'd been fighting the cravings the way I'd never fought the urge to take drugs or get drunk.

Diana Rowland

#9. That is a zombie ... Holy fucking shit. That's a mother fucking zombie and this shit is real.

Diana Rowland

#10. Women, when they kill themselves, choose far more romantic methods - like slashing their wrists or taking an overdose of sleeping pills.Abandoned princesses and Hollywood actresses have provided numerous examples of this.

Paul Coelho

#11. Lying on the metal table in front of me was a middle-aged man decked out in absolutely nothing at all. A dead man. Buck-ass naked with his little shriveled junk right there for everyone to see.

Diana Rowland

#12. We are the choice elected few
Let all the rest be damned
There is room enough in hell for you
We won't have heaven crammed!

Roland H. Bainton

#13. To unleash your full potential recognise and acknowledge the greatness in others.

Moonish Sood

#14. The world had went to hell, but at least I'd have pretty toenails.

Rose Wynters

#15. Three hours ago I was in bed, I thought miserably. I should have stayed there.

Diana Rowland

#16. I don't like being kidnapped. Or manipulated."
"I've done neither, silly. Though I'd like to hear about your other kidnap incidents. The aspects that put you off the experience.

Roberta Pearce

#17. It looked like pieces of bread pudding that had been soaked in raspberry syrup.

Diana Rowland

#18. Worse than a true evil is it to bear the burden of faults that are not truly yours.

Euripides

#19. We're all part of universe. We all serve some purpose.

Rebecca A. Rogers

#20. My breaking heart and I agree, that you and I could never be, so with my best ... my very best, I set you free

Rachael Yamagata

#21. Don't you love fall?" Stacey asked. "All the little festivals, the changing leaves, kids in Halloween costumes, the dead spewing up out of their graves to haunt the living ...

J.L. Bryan

#22. It is my sincere desire that my research and hard work will help create a world where we all learn to walk this Earth, safe, enlightened and free from the perils of cruelty, ignorance, and all the other dark and sinister forces, which make assholes possible.

Alexei Maxim Russell

#23. It's just like an alcoholic to think he's doing the Zombie Apocalypse wrong.

Michele W. Miller

#24. Who are your heroes?" asked Jo.
"Grandfather and Napoleon.

Louisa May Alcott

#25. As for Republicanism, no analogy could be found for it upon the face of the earth - unless we except the case of the "prairie dogs," an exception which seems to demonstrate, if anything, that democracy is a very admirable form of government - for dogs.

Edgar Allan Poe

#26. Look, I know this is the last thing you want to talk about, but I wanted to ask you ... " He trailed off, looking strangely uneasy.
"Ask me ... ?" Ask me to dinner? Ask me out for drinks? Ask me if I wanted to see what he looked like under that uniform? Yow, where'd that last one come from?

Diana Rowland

#27. Human beings are attracted to novelty: to probe the 'adjacent possible.' We didn't stay in the caves. We didn't stay on the planet, and soon we won't stay within the limitations of our biology. We move forward. We transcend our limits. We go to the moon, and we create the Internet.

Jason Silva

#28. Still, waking up this early was just wrong. "Why can't people be reasonable and only die after eleven A.M.?" I whined.

Diana Rowland

#29. God-fucking-damn but he was seriously good-looking. "Have you ever had the stuffed pancakes here? They're evil. I highly recommend them."
"Heh. The cop is recommending evil," I said. "Too funny."
To my surprise, Ivanov chuckled. "You've discovered my dark side.

Diana Rowland

#30. It reminds me of an old joke: What did the Zombie say to the whore?"
I looked at him blankly. "Um ... what?"
He winked. "Keep the tip.

Diana Rowland

#31. It's not necrophilia if she still has a pulse...

Scott Jonathan Nixon

#32. Whoa!" I jerked my hand up to stop him. "Wait, what?" I asked as sick horror shot through me. "You mean, like when the bodies get cut open?"
Delight lit his face. "Yes, you'll be helping with the autopsies. You didn't know that?

Diana Rowland

#33. Hey, look, I thought with a miserable laugh, this day just got worse.

Diana Rowland

#34. Though the euphoria surrounding Barack Obama's election last week as President-elect has not yet begun to subside, it is already time to recognise that the most important challenge facing the next U.S. president is to restore America's standing in the eyes of the world.

Shashi Tharoor

#35. Good morning!" my partner, Derrel, said in an insanely cheerful voice. "I need my Angel to come out and play.

Diana Rowland

#36. I wish anyone in this world could go to his fridge and pick whatever he wants. Because the day you open your fridge and there is nothing in it, it is difficult.

Zlatan Ibrahimovic