Hockey Mom Funny Quotes

#1. Monogamous musicians are like vegan hockey players.

Rob Sheffield

#2. Buck is a mammoth, like a yeti. A huge perverted, hairy whore of a yeti. According to the sportscasters, Buck's an excellent hockey player. I'd agree, based on his yearly salary alone. No one gets much money for sucking, not even extremely skilled prostitutes.

Helena Hunting

#3. All the room darkened and my heart again sank; inexpressible sadness weighed it down

Charlotte Bronte

#4. And all those things you listed right now, they're
things Garrett and I do together. Dude, you don't want me. You want me and
Garrett.

Elle Kennedy

#5. Most animals show themselves sparingly. The grizzly bear is six to eight hundred pounds of smugness. It has no need to hide. If it were a person, it would laugh loudly in quiet restaurants, boastfully wear the wrong clothes for special occasions, and probably play hockey.

Craig Childs

#6. It's not whether you win or lose - but whether I win or lose.

Sandy Lyle

#7. Many self-help books give you these neat, tidy formulas that are really illusions. They dupe people into thinking, 'Well if I can just do that, then everything's going to be okay.' My work differs in that I don't offer quick solutions and simple explanations.

John Bradshaw

#8. Why don't they allow professional wrestling at the Olympics? They allow pro basketball players and hockey players. Olympic pro wrestling would be awesome. The team from Mexico could wear those Mr. X masks. The French wrestler could hit his opponent with a baguette. Or perhaps just surrender.

Craig Ferguson

#9. I broke up with her to avoid getting into a serious relationship with her, and now it

Elle Kennedy

#10. We can't play stupid hockey, dumb hockey, greedy hockey, selfish hockey. We have to put the team ahead of our personal feelings.

Terry Crisp

#11. I grew up playing hockey and some football, and I always think about the first time you walk into the locker room on a new team. The cliques are looking at you funny, and you make one friend, but then they're trying to stab you in the back.

Aaron Douglas

#12. Never underestimate the pains of others but consider yourself lucky.

Abdulazeez Henry Musa

#13. You can't keep brilliance; you let it shine, and then you have to let it go.

Stephen Doyle

#14. When I'm not acting, I try to be normal, play golf, play hockey. It's funny because you're in this little bubble when you're working - you don't read books, you don't really keep up with the news, you're just living that life.

Taylor Kitsch

#15. A Joan Crawford dress looks really good on an hourglass figure.

Trinny Woodall

#16. someone like Grace. Someone exactly like Grace, with her Ted Bundy rants
and her calming presence and - hello, irony.

Elle Kennedy

#17. His eyes are a hazy swirl of
gray, like a thick mass of clouds gathering before an impending storm

Elle Kennedy

#18. Hockey s a funny game. You have to prove yourself every shift, every game. It's not up to anybody else. You have to take pride in yourself.

Paul Coffey

#19. A boy is content to be made into a civil man by caning, or any one of a number of other stratagems, but a girl, being disqualified by Nature, as it were, from such physical brutality, must remain forever something of a terra incognita. Don't you think?

Alan Bradley

#20. He knows all the golf lingo. You know? You hit your ball, he's like "there's a golf shot. That's a golf shot." Well of course it's a golf shot; I just hit a golf ball. You don't see Gretzky skating around going "there's a hockey shot, that's a hockey shot."

Bill Engvall

#21. I've got a hockey record, I took off my skate and tried to stab a guy, I'm the only person who ever tried that.

Adam Sandler

#22. Dessert was an over baked chocolate chip cookies the size of a hockey puck and just about as tasty.

Carl Hiaasen

#23. This is the only thing that has seen more parties than us.

Steven Tyler