He Has Girlfriend Quotes

#1. Enjoy him while it lasts," I called. "Apparently he has Girlfriend ADD."
She looked away, but not before I caught the blush staining her cheeks.

Gena Showalter

#2. My first girlfriend broke up with me on a yellow legal pad. After she picked me up from the airport one day, she took out a letter that her therapist wrote, and she read it to me. She and her therapists wrote a letter breaking up with me together.

Max Winkler

#3. I never broke up with my girlfriends, they broke up with me.

Manny Pacquiao

#4. If this were a [Hollywood] studio film, I wouldn't have pushed my father into a table, I would have beat him up. My father wouldn't have kissed my girlfriend; he would have raped her.

Noah Wyle

#5. People say love is a gift but i say love is a burden, loving someone and having to watch them be in love with someone else.

Joshua

#6. Sookie: Hey, our hair's the same color.
Eric: Sure is, Girlfriend.

Charlaine Harris

#7. What would you call your decorating style?" I asked. "Boring-bachelor? Or messy-loner? He looked over at me. "More like distracted-about-my-detainee-girlfriend," he said.

Katie Kacvinsky

#8. I have a girlfriend and she really keeps me grounded. Makes me normal.

Ian Axel

#9. My first serious girlfriend, when I was 16, was Mormon. I went to her house for 'family home evening,' and I was like, 'Why aren't you people ignoring each other and watching television?'

Trey Parker

#10. I don't think that we really know our animals. We think we do because we're humans, and we think we can control things like that. We don't know anybody that we love. It could be a girlfriend or a cat. I think we just have to be at peace with that.

Caroline Paul

#11. I don't think your girlfriend likes me." Putting on the most bored face I can muster, I add deadpan, "I'm torn up." Shaking his head at me, he mutters, "Yeah, I can see that.

Belle Aurora

#12. The marathon is my only girlfriend. I give her everything I have.

Toshihiko Seko

#13. If he mistreated and abused his last girlfriend, why would you want to be his new girlfriend?

Karen E. Quinones Miller

#14. When a man cheats on his wife or girlfriend, he breaks the spell that made him once the special one.

Linda Alfiori

#15. I tried to go back and talk about what I did know. I told her about one girl he'd brought home from Cornell; I'd asked if she was his girlfriend, and he's said, When you define something, you limit it.

Melissa Bank

#16. The goal of Christian dating is not to have a boyfriend or girlfriend but to find a spouse. Have that in mind as you get to know one an- other, and if you're not ready to commit to a relationship with the end goal of marriage, it's better not to date but simply to remain friends.

Mark Driscoll

#17. If I'm in a relationship and my girlfriend is sleeping with other people, I don't need to know who it is; I just want to know how she feels about it.

Ben Folds

#18. Dash is for sure straight!" Boomer announced. "He has a super-pretty ex-girlfriend named Sofia, who I think he still has a thing for, and also, in seventh grade, there was a game of spin the bottle and it was my turn and I spun and it landed at Dash, but he wouldn't let me kiss him.

David Levithan

#19. We stop at a red light.Mom stares at me."You like him"
"OH GOD,MOM."
"You do.You like this boy."
"He's just a friend.He has a girlfriend."
"Anna has a boooy-friend," Seany chants.
"I do not!"
"ANNA HAS A BOOOY-FRIEND!

Stephanie Perkins

#20. To give a man 5 sous because he is poor and has no bread is perfect, but to give him a blowjob because he has no girlfriend is too much of a good thing: you don't have to do that.

Michel Houellebecq

#21. Steve Dallas ... a frat-boy lawyer who I knew in school. He's never written me. I suspect he was shot by an annoyed girlfriend, which has saved me many legal fees.

Berkeley Breathed

#22. Jamie Dornan is one of those guys who has no idea how gorgeous he is. He's crazy in love with his girlfriend and a crazy talent and a great singer and a great actor; just a lovely, lovely human being. It kind of makes you want to throw up a bit, but in all the right ways!

Jennifer Morrison

#23. Besides, he's got a girlfriend now and has no interest in the little ink bunnies anymore.

Jay Crownover

#24. One thing concerns me a little, nick has a girlfriend, right? Well, how do you think she'll feel about all of this? He probed. He had this look on his face that he always had when I'm doing something a little bit naughty. You know, something you can get away with, but it's still a bit dodgy.

Jessica Thompson

#25. Kyle, open up. What kind of weirdo locks his bedroom door anyway?"
"The kind that has jerks staying over who steal girlfriends."
I pressed my fingers into my eyes and took a deep breath as the pain in back and legs got a little worse. "She wasn't your girlfriend."
"Irrelevant!" he yelled.

Shelly Crane

#26. Despite everything that has happened tonight, it's this stupid, basic fact that makes me feel like I am going to cry: He didn't deny that she was his girlfriend.

Lauren Oliver

#27. We are constantly protecting the male ego, and it's a disservice to men. If a man has any sensitivity or intelligence, he wants to get the straight scoop from his girlfriend.

Betty Dodson

#28. His eyes widen. Then he laughs. "Elissa isn't my girlfriend. Jesus, that's disgusting. She's my sister." It's my turn to be surprised. "Your sister?" "Yes." Relief has never felt more odious.

Leisa Rayven

#29. How does a guy tell his girlfriend he has no idea who she is? Who he himself is? He doesn't tell her. He pretends, just like he's been pretending with everyone else. - Silas Nash

Tarryn Fisher

#30. A mate of mine has just told me he's shagging his girlfriend and her twin, I said how can you tell them apart, he said "her brothers got a moustache!"

Billy Connolly

#31. The irony of talking to animals and an imaginary girlfriend, who keep me sane, even though I know I look like a raving lunatic, isn't lost on me.

Elyse Draper

#32. If you make your best friend and your significant other the same person, you don't have to disconnect to go tell your girlfriend everything.

Niecy Nash

#33. You want to take me to a movie?" I asked.
"Well, not really," he said. "What I really want is for you to be my girlfriend. But I thought saying that might scare you off.

Sarah Dessen

#34. The lips on my upper right bicep are my girlfriend's lips. She has the most amazing lips, and I wanted to carry them around with me everywhere I go, considering I can't carry her lips physically with me. So I decided to place them in a discreet location, such as the inside part of my bicep.

Jake Owen

#35. When I don't have a girlfriend, who I am answerable to, I can go out and hang with people. But whether you go for a movie with someone or a meal or a drive, it is assumed that you are dating that person.

Shahid Kapoor

#36. A Bridgeport, Connecticut, man presented his girlfriend with an engagement ring and handed her one end of a ribbon; the other end disappeared into his pocket. "A surprise," he said, and urged her to pull it. She obliged. The ribbon was attached to the trigger of a revolver. The man died instantly.

Erik Larson

#37. Did any agents ever put Diane Ladd up for some of the great parts, even though she always got great reviews? No! But do they put up the girlfriend of the studio executive who's gonna do them a favor later? You betcha.

Diane Ladd

#38. I would like to have a girlfriend who is more mature than my mental age.

Yuki

#39. I mean, you can't have sex until you're married if you're Mormon. The first time I had sex, my parents found out. They were listening in on the phone while I was talking about sex to my girlfriend. They freaked out, man. They both cornered me in my bedroom.

Bert McCracken

#40. My last girlfriend was a Showgirl - But we eventually broke up because she wouldn't Tell me anything. Now I'm dating a girl who looks exactly like my grandma, only my girl older.
-James Lee Schmidt and Jarod Kintz

James Lee Schmidt

#41. I don't date my girlfriend because she's a model. I date her because I love her.

Adam Levine

#42. Why is your skin the best feeling in the world?

Kamand Kojouri

#43. Henry unpacked the car and loaded himself up with everything they'd brought, little bags and big ones, a string tote, a knapsack.
As he started up the driveway, his girlfriend said, "Do you have the wine, Hank?"
Whoever Hank was, he had it.

Melissa Bank

#44. I'm not a militant lesbian. I carry myself in a way that makes it easier for women to relate to. I can be your best girlfriend.

Jackie Warner

#45. I said to my girlfriend, you shouldn't eat before you swim. She said, "why not"? I said, you look fat.

Jimmy Carr

#46. I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that.

Mitch Hedberg

#47. I'm more likely to give you a cuddle than a punch in the face. I have a soft side, especially with my girlfriend. I send her flowers and use my culinary skills to pull off romantic meals. I do great Thai dishes.

Jai Courtney

#48. Girlfriends are not wives. I draw the line at married women. Actually, women married to men with guns. If someone's girlfriend wants to make herself available, that's her business. Just don't give my name to your boyfriend.

Jack Dancer

#49. I gave my girlfriend something she didn't expect for Valentine's day ... Chlamydia.

Frankie Boyle

#50. If I don't get a girlfriend soon (number one on the list) I may have to resort to drastic measures like surgery (me) or hypnosis (them).

J.A. Buckle

#51. My girlfriend always laughs during sex - no matter what she's reading.

Steve Jobs

#52. how you would feel if your old girlfriend showed up and she had the IQ of a frog. You'd

Bobby Adair

#53. I went to church. It didn't help. In those days that was the best place to meet a girlfriend. In church! All of us praying to be different.

Jeffrey Eugenides

#54. Ryan, when did you get a girlfriend?" his sister asked.
"She's not my girlfriend, Kaylen," Ryan replied. "Go away.

S. Walden

#55. In 1940 I was just turning 5 years old and being taken to the movies. For those of us who were not old enough to understand the horror of war it was a very romantic era because these guys were kissing their wives and girlfriends goodbye and going off to fight and become heroes.

Woody Allen

#56. When your girlfriend broke your heart, don't even say a word, just smile because she gives you the opportunity to find someone better than her.

Werley Nortreus

#57. No relationship is perfect nor will anyone ever be the best boyfriend or girlfriend. Long as you put in the effort and try to make your lover happy. That's all we can ask for.

Kevin McCarty

#58. My girlfriend bought a cook book the other day called 'Cheap and easy vegetarian cooking'. Which is perfect for her, because not only is she vegetarian ...

Jimmy Carr