Top 34 Funny Desk Quotes
#1. Every time I'm shooting a movie I want to kill myself. Because I don't see the light in the end of the tunnel.
Emir Kusturica
#2. On George W Bush: That man sits at that desk in the White House with the button that can end the world. My father's younger than him and we don't give him the controls for the television.
Billy Connolly
#3. (Hunter) "conner was at his desk, tapping away at another computer. It was amazing how much he and Quinn looked alike. Quinn nudged me as if he knew what I was thinking.
"I'm cuter,"he informed me loftily.
Alyxandra Harvey
#4. If you can play well in the studio, you can play well on stage.
Ritchie Blackmore
#5. It's a funny thing: people often ask how I discipline myself to write. I can't begin to understand the question. For me, the discipline is turning off the computer and leaving my desk to do something else.
Barbara Kingsolver
#7. Well, we see an increasingly weaker labor movement as a result of the overall assault on the labor movement and as a result of the globalization of capital.
Angela Davis
#8. I can't write at night. For me, I'm programmed to believe that nighttime is for relaxation.
Diablo Cody
#9. WHAT you DO NOT KNOW YOURSELF, you CANNOT TEACH ANOTHER.
Daniel Quinn
#10. Michael is a funny character, for whom I have a great deal of affection. He sat across his desk and seemed to be a bit of a blunt fellow. We began talking about the characters and he opened up about his vision.
Madeleine Stowe
#11. A molehill man is a pseudo-busy executive who comes to work at 9 AM and finds a molehill on his desk. He has until 5 PM to make this molehill into a mountain. An accomplished molehill man will often have his mountain finished before lunch.
Fred Allen
#12. And it was from a Hindu, Swami Satprakashananda with his Christmas talks on "Jesus Christ, the Son of God," that I received the strongest confirmation - by an outside examiner, as it were - of Jesus's divine nature.
Huston Smith
#13. Is it true you shouted at Professor Umbridge?'
'Yes,' said Harry.
'You called her a liar?'
'Yes.'
'You told her He Who Must Not Be Named is back?'
'Yes.'
Professor McGonagall sat down behind her desk, watching Harry closely. Then she said, 'Have a biscuit, Potter.
J.K. Rowling
#14. I don't need somebody behind a desk to tell me what a marketing survey says is funny. I got 3 million miles and 70,000 tickets sold, telling me that I know how to make people laugh.
D. L. Hughley
#15. She stopped at the desk and held up a can for his view. "This looks like an ordinary hairspray can, right?"
"Of course." he said though he had no idea what hairspray was.
Gena Showalter
#16. The main thing is to remain oneself, under any circumstances; that was and is our common purpose.
Madeleine K. Albright
#17. When you go to work, if your name is on the building, you're rich. If your name is on your desk, you're middle class. And if your name is on your shirt, you're poor.
Rich Hall
#18. Stop calling me a Nazi." "Why should I?" Miles's hand came down on the desk. "Because the systematic slaughter of millions of people isn't funny!
Francesca Zappia
#19. This may sound funny, but as much as the 'Today' show matured me, it also was something of a cocoon. I'd been happy there. I never went into the boss's office and pounded my fist on the desk, saying, 'Give me more money! Give me a prime-time show!'
Jane Pauley
#20. A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
Mark Twain
#21. We didn't have packed lunches at my school. I was a lunch monitor as well - I used to take everyone's chips!
Robert Pattinson
#22. Your greatest fault," Eisenhower tells Patton, "is your audacity.
Bill O'Reilly
#23. But I really like hosting, I think it's a strength of mine. It allows me to improvise, and I love the spontaneity of that, and I think I'm funny behind the desk when interviewing someone.
Garry Shandling
#25. Oh- and grab the plastic bag over by my suitcase."
I slug down the last of the coffee and get up. The bag contains panty hose. I put them on her desk.
"They're for you."
"You want me to look homeless, desperate, but also kind of fabulous?
Holly Black
#26. In the office, Michael sat behind our father's desk, clicking away at the computer with his right hand, and making notes with his left. Ambidextrous freak.
Rachel Vincent
#27. I'd proven to the world that maturity, experience, dedication, and ingenuity can make up for a little senescence. Muscle tightening is not the only thing that happens to our bodies over time. We gain knowledge, focus, and understanding, and those things can help us win.
Dara Torres
#28. I met the girl who works at the Doubletree front desk, she gave me her number. It's ZERO. I tried to call from here, some other woman answered. "You sound older!"
Mitch Hedberg
#29. Being a vampire princess, on another planet, it requires a guardian, especially when she discovers a day that her powers are not enough to help her follow her own path in an unknown planet ...
Pet Torres
#30. Being generous without keeping score strengthens your spirit, keeps you focused on the people who make your business what it is, and helps breed success.
Brandon Steiner
#31. Getting money from my dad is a finesse job. Luckily, I have finesse coming out of my arse. I barged into his study without knocking, marched across to his desk, and held out my hand. "Give me twenty pounds," I snapped. "I need twenty pounds. Give it to me. Now!
Sarra Manning
#32. I was not much interested in school, and both at secondary school and at university, I only just scraped through, with as little effort as I judged possible without failing.
Nikolaas Tinbergen
#33. I'm so excited. Jay Leno is on the show tonight. He brought some really funny jokes and some great stories. Although I'm a little concerned he also brought his old desk and Kevin Eubanks. I just want Jay to be comfortable, but not too comfortable.
Jimmy Fallon
#34. It's funny to me that power comes from sitting behind a desk. It should come from spending yourself.
Kirsty Eagar
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