Drunk History Funny Quotes

#1. Dude, are my eyes seeing what my brain is telling my eyes that they're seeing?

James Roday

#2. Time is no river. Not here. In this tomb, time is the stone. It is the darkness, permanent and unyielding, its only measure the twin pendulums of life - breath and the beating of my heart. In.

Pierce Brown

#3. I started to say something, but Richard said, "Come on, Anita. We have to go now." He was right. I could kill a lot of them, but not all. I hadn't brought a spare clip for the machine gun. I hadn't thought I'd need it. Silly me. We

Laurell K. Hamilton

#4. I always say that polo, for you to pursue a career, mainly any sport, you have to be born in the right place. If you're born in Hawaii, you surf. If you're born in Austria, you probably will ski. If you're born in Argentina, you most likely ride horses and have a chance to play polo.

Nacho Figueras

#5. It is an unnecessary burden to make negative judgmental assumptions about others. We are all on a journey.

Steve Maraboli

#6. I found a way to see in the dark. Close your eyes.

J.R. Rim

#7. To speak of atrocious crimes in mild language is treason to virtue.

Edmund Burke

#8. I always look for interesting, complex characters. You know, interesting, well-written material.

Sam Underwood

#9. The race of mankind would perish did they cease to aid each other. We cannot exist without mutual help. All therefore that need aid have a right to ask it from their fellow-men; and no one who has the power of granting can refuse it without guilt.

Walter Scott

#10. Maris couldn't help how he felt. Darling owned him. He always had. Even though they could and would never be anything more than best friends, Darling was his heart.

Sherrilyn Kenyon

#11. Attractive Etonians who go straight onto the Stock Exchange missing University on their fathers advice: the raw material of the great bores.

Geoffrey Madan

#12. I always wanted it to be multi-cam from the beginning. In the first seeds of the idea, I wanted a live audience, multi-cam show. That was very important for me.

John Mulaney