Vampire Comedy Quotes

#1. I am actually working on The Neighbors sitcom. We are starting from scratch. I am also working on a comedy movie and a vampire movie. I also have the pilot for The Tommy Wiseau Show and of course The House That Drips Blood On Alex, which we are hoping to make a sequel.

Tommy Wiseau

#2. You're sure he's not a vampire?' Claire said.'I've seen movies. They're sneaky.' She was kidding. Eve didn't smile.

Rachel Caine

#3. So you want me to go to a human orgy, where I will not be welcome, and you want us to leave before I get to enjoy myself? ~Eric Northman

Charlaine Harris

#4. Leave before I have to rip your eyes out with my dull Lady Bic razor.

Rose Pressey

#5. What happened to the first vampire who fell for the first mortal? She turned him into a sucker

Brian Meehl

#6. Do you mind if we leave here so I can chain smoke 'til I throw up so it will be easier to quit?

Robyn Peterman

#7. Sorry, pigtails, but subtlety isn't an option anymore.

T.A. Miles

#8. If I let her in I'm doomed. It's like inviting a vampire into your house. Once you've invite them in, that's it, you're good as dead!

Janet Evanovich

#9. Meeting a vampire is kind of like a celebrity sighting, but where the celebrity possibly wants to kill you.

Adrianne Ambrose