Taped Quotes

#1. Voice mail was invented by confident people to make unconfident people say stupid shit that gets taped and haunts us forever.

A.S. King

#2. So I dipped into my childhood and came up with Nicky Deuce. I wanted him to get into a lot of mischief, like the time I taped a fork to a broom handle and cattle-rustled a steak off the barbecue of the next-door neighbor.

Steve Schirripa

#3. I was really, because I thought it was extremely excruciating when I watched a tape of it, that my husband taped for me and I never watched it again after that.

Jo Brand

#4. Everything is pre-taped these days, but I'm a believer in, 'If you can't do it live, don't do it.'

Crystal Bowersox

#5. It's like the television equivalent of one of those cymbal-banging monkey toys being duct-taped to your forehead.

Matthew Norman

#6. We look good taped back together.

Sarah Cross

#7. Her lips remind me of kite strings and I find myself thinking about panda bears. Panda bears do not fly kites, I tell myself.
'I thought you were dead,' she says.
Maybe if you taped a kite to a panda paw and scared the panda so that it started running, the kite might start to lift off.

Michael Ian Black

#8. There's rumors in the Twittersphere. If I find out that any of my officer is giving out drug and alcohol I send their ass to prison with a snorkel duct-taped to their mouth and me s***ing down that Snorkel

Ice Cube

#9. What about Ding-Dong?"

"Detective Inspector Bell couldn't find his arse with both hands if you duct-taped them to it. Come on.

Stuart MacBride

#10. Growing up, I was a nerd. With actual taped eyeglasses.

Taye Diggs

#11. My sister, Judy, has always said that she would like to lie in state, propped up in her coffin with her eyes blared wide open, face fixed in a big grin, and have a taped greeting for all her mourners. Something real upbeat and, well, live-sounding, like: 'He-e-e-ey!Cuteshoestellyomamahi!

Jill Conner Browne

#12. For awhile I taped soap operas and watched them at night when I thought I might be forgetting what it was like to be human. After a while I stopped, because from the examples I saw on those shows, forgetting humanity was a good thing.

Charlaine Harris

#13. My broken heart had been taped and glued to perfection. And all of these things were gone.
They had to be gone so I could face the future and put him in the past.

Kylie Scott

#14. As I slowly managed to take what I had learned into a transition from contestant to announcer and warm-up, I first had to prove myself on pilots. And as you know, many pilots are taped for each show that is lucky enough to breakthrough to being a series.

Randy West

#15. When I got the job on 'Lost,' I was a broke university student living in the crappiest part of town, with a duct-taped back window on a broken-down car. I existed on peanut butter and tea.

Evangeline Lilly

#16. God's got my picture,' Piper reiterated, 'taped right up there on his big, big, giiinormous fridge.' She smiled. 'Because he's crazy about me. And about you, too.

Candace Calvert

#17. I have never liked the phone. Ten years ago, during a misguided fit of self-improvement, I pasted smiley-faced stickers on the phone in my bedroom and on the one in the kitchen. Then I typed out two labels and taped them to the handsets. "It's an opportunity, not an attack," they read.

Alice Sebold

#18. So he taped a sign on the bathroom door that said OFFICE OF MR. THOMAS WADE. My mom put a sign next to it that said I'D RATHER BE FISHING.

Katherine Applegate

#19. The big mathematical challenge for flying robots is making them move in six dimensions: x, y, z, pitch, yaw and roll. We create 3-D obstacle courses in the lab - windows, doors, hula-hoops taped to posts - and ask the robots to fly through. It looks like a Harry Potter Quidditch match.

Vijay Kumar

#20. That party last night was awfully crazy I wish we taped it I danced my ass off and had this one girl completely naked Drink my beer and smoke my weed But my good friends is all I need Pass out at three, wake up at 10 Go out to eat, then do it again. Man I love college

Asher Roth

#21. I liked the movie Splash a lot when I was little. I think we taped it when it was on TV, and then would watch the movie fairly often.

Jason Polan

#22. The guard, clearly overdoing it with the steroids, had a head that looked like two old crisps taped to an Easter egg. There

Paul Mitchell

#23. I'm a taped-together girl, but I can carry my own baggage.

Emery Lord

#24. He started the damn thing!" Nixon said in a taped telephone conversation with his spiritual adviser, the Reverend Billy Graham. "He killed Diem!

Tim Weiner

#25. I love you," he said, his voice almost musical with happiness.
She shot him a scowl. "Isn't saying that a bit dangerous considering these aren't wooden swords and the ends aren't even taped?"
He laughed.

C.C. Hunter

#26. I don't think Amber taped Scott or testified for money, but the opportunity certainly presented itself. It makes me a bit uncomfortable, but at least she never sold the story before trial to the tabloids.

Catherine Crier

#27. Some members of Congress ought to have their mouths taped instead of their speeches.

Evan Esar

#28. To me, it doesn't feel like it's just another rock record that somebody put out. It feels like we taped into the culture a little bit

Billie Joe Armstrong

#29. The actor's tense, he's being taped and things are not falling naturally. That's what I hate about Boadway. I feel like I'm giving a whole lot for nothing. I like to capture things and hold them there and share them with the whole world.

Michael Jackson

#30. Sure, there were a few more duct-taped tears in the vinyl seats, a few new dings in the fiberglass surfboards lining the walls, but the bacon was still crisp and pancakes were available twenty-four hours a day, the way the good Lord intended.

Rob Thomas

#31. Felix can't act his way out of a box." "Boxes are tricky," Felix said, frowning. "And sometimes they're taped shut.

Shannon Hale

#32. The best thing about being a cartoonist is to walk into a bar or someone's apartment and they don't know you, but they've taped one of your pieces up.

Ted Rall

#33. Playing juvenile pranks. In twelfth grade he built an electronic metronome - one of those tick-tick-tick devices that keep time in music class - and realized it sounded like a bomb. So he took the labels off some big batteries, taped them together, and put it in a school locker; he rigged

Walter Isaacson

#34. You can die trying to get along with a disagreeable man," she said, and I put a star beside it when I wrote it down and then taped it to the rear-view mirror for the rest of the drive. She hadn't said "abusive," I noticed; she had said that just disagreeable could kill you.

Debby Bull

#35. My first crush was Barry Manilow. He performed on TV and I taped it. When no one was around I'd kiss the screen.

Janet Jackson

#36. Talking about the all night concerts, I did some of the first all night concerts back in the 60's with this little harmonium, and I also had saxophone taped delays.

Terry Riley

#37. Part of me wants to turn him into hamburger and part of me doesn't want to beat up somebody who's taped to a tree.

Audrey Niffenegger

#38. the Russian engineers had taped, strapped and sealed our docking module's hatch just a little too enthusiastically, with multiple layers. So we did the true space-age thing: we broke into Mir using a Swiss Army knife. Never leave the planet without one. As

Chris Hadfield

#39. We taped all this and then got it transcribed and picked the best lines or ideas or ways to take a scene. I've done that many times, and it can improve the script but also wreck a perfectly good scene.

John Schlesinger

#40. A video taped stage performance is just - you know, it's never gonna be the same as it is if you're sitting there live in the theatre.

Nathan Lane

#41. A voice in my head told me I acted like a spoiled brat, but I duct taped that sucker shut. I didn't make it far, though. The seductive cedar smell enveloped me as Lux hoisted me off the ground, threw me over his shoulder and carried me back to the group.

Isabelle Crusoe

#42. I'm very lucky to be on 'Melissa and Joey' because it's a multi-cam sitcom, and it was a nice transition from theatre because it's taped in front of a live audience.

Nick Robinson

#43. You should never play safe with your heart. It doesn't get to grow if you don't take it out. You break it. You give it away. And sometimes, you kind of hope someone gives it back to you - maybe wrapped up and taped but better because they held it for a little while.

Rhys Ford

#44. I didn't blame him. God, I wouldn't have blamed Bones if he'd duct-taped a vibrator to me and just took care of the whole sordid nightmare that way

Jeaniene Frost

#45. When the idea of 'Chopped' surfaced, it was originally meant to be taped at some guy's mansion with him and his crazy Chihuahua. A stuffy fellow in a tuxedo was to host, and the losing chef's dish was then fed to the dog! I am not kidding, I saw it! I think it is genius! Twisted, but genius!

Ted Allen

#46. Laine taped the last box shut. That was it, then: All of Gavin's belongings put away; some for charity, some for the dump, some to be saved for a happier 'one day' that Laine felt, right now, was as distant as the stars.

Stephen M. Irwin

#47. Just the other day someone threw a bra duct-taped to a tennis ball. I just stood there, playing guitar, thinking how this was totally premeditated. Some girl sat around inventing a way to get her bra onstage from 40 rows back.

Dave Grohl

#48. What if Sam's heart got broken again? As with most kids who are fourteen, it has been spackled and duct-taped and caulked back together many times as it is. [p. 258]

Anne Lamott

#49. My greatest fear is feeling like a professional novelist. Somebody who creates characters, who sits down and has pieces of paper taped to the wall - what's going to happen in this scene, or this act. What I like is for it to be a much more scary, sloppy reflection of who I am.

Jonathan Safran Foer

#50. There wasn't an episode of 'Will & Grace' that didn't begin with my voice saying, 'Will & Grace' is taped before a live studio audience.

Eric McCormack

#51. I remember a friend many years ago who had taped a sign to his refrigerator: There's a dream dreaming us. If you try to think about what that means it makes your mind silly, but that silliness is good.

Natalie Goldberg

#52. Taped on the wall was a hand-drawn picture- a stick figure with a bow on the head holding a litterbag.

Suzanne Crowley

#53. I usually start by doing one or more color studies of the subject on a piece of canvas taped to cardboard.

Mary Beth McKenzie

#54. I have a very dear family and very dear friends. They're my rock. These are people who knew me from the beginning, you know, as a loser in a 1972 Dodge Dart with the bumper literally duct-taped to the body.

Mark Ruffalo

#55. I taped the autopsy photos from Marilyn Monroe's death to my lunch box in fifth grade, and I would write stories in which someone inevitably died.

Karin Slaughter

#56. On the prow of the wagon, in an attempt to attract business among the Quarterites, Ignatius taped a sheet of Big Chief paper on which he had printed in crayon: TWELVE INCHES (12) OF PARADISE. So far no one had responded to its message.

John Kennedy Toole

#57. Since I was born I wanted to entertain and communicate. I wanted to communicate so badly ... My sixth-grade math teacher taped my mouth. I'm still out to get her [for that]. It was very traumatizing!

Jenna Elfman

#58. I didn't dictate sections of 'Visions of Cody'. I typed up a segment of taped conversation with Neal Cassady, or Cody, talking about his early adventures in L.A. It's four chapters.

Jack Kerouac

#59. I cut out construction paper feathers and taped them on my arms so I can fly! Pretty neat, huh?

Bill Watterson

#60. No one around me was obsessed with Fred Astaire except for me. It just snowballed, really. I started with tap lessons. When I didn't have tap shoes, I taped nickels on the bottom of my penny loafers.

David Hallberg

#61. Do you know you couldn't get a date with a $20 bill taped to your forehead?

Roddy Piper

#62. I taped my first series for PBS in 1982 at WJCT-TV in Jacksonville, Florida. The show, called 'Everyday Cooking with Jacques Pepin,' was about saving time and money in the kitchen - and it was a celebration of simple and unpretentious food.

Jacques Pepin

#63. He had Oly letter a little card that he taped on his wall. The thing read, 'The only liars bigger than the quack are the quack's patients.' Arty used to just keep me in stitches. Eleven years old he was then.

Katherine Dunn

#64. The rig began shaking like caffeine withdrawal." --Opening sentence of THE FURY.

"The duct-taped Buick swam north on Rush Street, hunting whores like a lesser white shark." --First sentence of Chapter One, THE FURY

Shane Gericke

#65. Some are pre-taped interviews because maybe we can't get that person live or maybe we're not sure it's going to work out right so we tape it an hour in advance.

Bob Edwards

#66. handwritten piece of paper taped to the wall by the bar telling customers not to order a lager 'as a punch in the face often offends'.

Neil Gaiman

#67. I was the only person at Univision who had complete creative control of my own show, by contract. They didn't like that. I was the executive producer; I owned the studio where we taped. I decided who went on my show and who didn't.

Cristina Saralegui

#68. He checked the impulse, and darted a glance over his shoulder to see Mercy and Colin marching four duct-taped cartel boys in at gunpoint. "Look, boss," Mercy said with a dark laugh. "We've been making friends." "I

Lauren Gilley

#69. Taped to her wall, where someone else might hang a crucifix, is a page torn from Rolling Stone: Prince in a misty lavender paradise.

Jardine Libaire

#70. The remaining half-hour of the drive passed quite peacefully for me, and it's a pretty drive along I-70 and the Evergreen Parkway, if you don't have a towel taped over your face.

Mark Henwick

#71. I read papers, try to watch news programs on television, but, as a rule, recorded. During the day I have no time for that, so I watch something taped. As for the newspapers, I try to get through them every day. Additionally, of course, I look through news bulletins.

Vladimir Putin

#72. I taped my original audition for 'Fargo' with my agency in Chicago, Stewart Talent.

Allison Tolman

#73. My god! It's a hamster with explosives taped around it's waist!

Colin Mochrie

#74. You know you're down and out when Okies laugh at you,' she said. With our garbage bag taped window, our tied down hood, and art supplies strapped to the roof, we'd out-Okied the Okies.

Jeannette Walls

#75. I sometimes read about authors who say they require a perfectly silent room maintained at precisely 68 degrees, with trash bags taped over the windows and a white-noise machine in the corner to write, and I think, 'Who are these people, and do any of them have kids?'

Jennifer Weiner

#76. Technological man can't believe in anything that can't be measured, taped, or put into a computer.

Clare Boothe Luce

#77. The way my team are doing, we could get Wilt Chamberlain in a trade and find out that he's really two midgets Scotch-taped together.

Gene Shue

#78. Yeah sure,why not?"i said,making a mental note to get a good look at his wings. For all I knew, they were remote-controlled and duct taped to his back."
-max

James Patterson

#79. I wouldn't want to be a Russian leader. You'd never know when you were being taped.

Richard M. Nixon

#80. There are pages ripped out and taped all over one wall. (Not taped - stuck to the wall with spells.) (And this is exactly the sort of thing I'm sick of. Like, just use some tape. Why come up with a spell for sticking paper to the wall? Tape. Exists.)

Rainbow Rowell

#81. I think if we taped a lot of families that claim to be relatively normal, you'd be surprised when you hear some of the things said.

Noah Baumbach

#82. I would not like to be a political leader in Russia. They never know when they're being taped.

Richard M. Nixon

#83. I was a swan, but ripped apart and taped haphazardly back together again.

Erin Bomboy