Stuart MacBride Quotes

#1. shook his head, sending his jowls wobbling. 'No chance.' He checked his watch. 'Show doesn't

Stuart MacBride

#2. Nah, mostly they're just students. Bit of weed, bit of booze, bit of studying, bit of pining away in their rooms wondering why nobody wants to shag them.

Stuart MacBride

#3. The day was dark as a lawyer's soul.

Stuart MacBride

#4. A thoughtful pause and then: 'Maybe to make it easy to find, but look like it's hard to find, so you'd find it but think it wasn't meant to be found, even though you only really found it because someone wanted it to be found?' Logan

Stuart MacBride

#5. Logan battered to the end of 'Started Out With Nothin', drove in silence for a minute, then launched into 'Living Is a Problem Because Everything Dies'. Making up half of the words as he went along.

Stuart MacBride

#6. Where Insch was bald, Steel looked as if someone had sellotaped a Cairn terrier to her head. Rumour had it she was only forty-two, but she looked a lot older. Years of chain smoking had left her face looking like a holiday home for lines and wrinkles.

Stuart MacBride

#7. Finnie kicked a packet of washing powder. "Why am I surrounded by morons? Did I tick the wrong bloody box for room service? I wanted scrambled eggs on toast, but they delivered a family-sized bag of idiots!

Stuart MacBride

#8. Guthrie handed him the mug, a wee pout pulling his pale face out of shape. With his semi-skimmed skin, faint ginger hair, and blond eyebrows he looked like a ghost that had been at the pies. "Milk, two sugars.

Stuart MacBride

#9. What about Ding-Dong?"

"Detective Inspector Bell couldn't find his arse with both hands if you duct-taped them to it. Come on.

Stuart MacBride

#10. Must be nice to be a seagull. You eat, you sleep, you shag, and if you're having a bad day you can shite on everyone from a great height. Doesn't even have to be a bad day, you can do it just for fun.

Stuart MacBride

#11. Ina stood and shuffled over tot he urn on the fireplace. Stroked it with a twisted finger. "How are we supposed to get more consecrated soil, now? Taxi drivers always look at you so strangely when you get in with a shovel and say, 'Take me to the nearest graveyard.

Stuart MacBride

#12. WPC Buchan might not know much about art, but she knew what gave her the fucking willies, and these things took the hairy biscuit.

Stuart MacBride