Tags Humor Quotes

#1. Hell hath no fury like a queen scorned. ...
... That would be the last time he made a crack about being a flamer to someone with a flamethrower for hands. Though he'd really lost it when Raven sang the lyric to Disco Inferno.

J.T. Bock

#2. What was I waiting for with regards to the sea-soaked woman laughing in front of me? What would I tell myself if I didn't watch her grow gorgeously ripe with our baby? If we didn't become sleep-deprived and snappy with each other as we tried to navigate the stormy seas of parenthood together.

Dorothy Koomson

#3. Ish #153 Artificial plants grow best in artificial light.

Regina Griffin

#4. Oh, hey, kettle, I'm pot and wow, you're black." - Owen

Olivia Cunning

#5. Ish #1 It's not your mama's macaroni and cheese if you used spaghetti noodles.

Regina Griffin

#6. My first semester I had only nine students. Hoping they might view me as professional and well prepared, I arrived bearing name tags fashioned in the shape of maple leaves.

David Sedaris

#7. This coming from the god who zinged Guinevere and Lancelot while King Arthur was away slaying dragons.

Tai

#8. If bliss are a type of potato, then ignorance can be french-fried

Josh Stern

#9. I don't have one role that I want to play. I guess ... I want to be a producer. I want to be an activist. I want to be proactive in bringing about work for men, women, boys, girls, everybody who is good at what they do and deserve a shot at it.

Octavia Spencer

#10. He started a brief staring contest, which was apparently his new method of persuading her to agree to his point of view without the hassle of actually yelling.

Lauren James

#11. You will need to verify your identity with a sacrifice."
"Didn't you ever hear of retina scans? Maybe fingerprints? Something less invasive?

J.T. Bock

#12. We all know I'm marrying you, as soon as you get over your thing with dog tags and realize a stethoscope is way sexier, anyway. - Tanner

Kandi Steiner

#13. You're all here. Mixed in a bit with some of my cells. May have to redefine our relationship after this.

J.T. Bock

#14. Ish #109 If MapQuest says make a right, go straight. You'll get there quicker.

Regina Griffin

#15. Not many people are enemies to anyone. But the ones full of greed or hate, pride or fear - their passion is strong enough to lever all the world into war.

Orson Scott Card

#16. I know what I'm giving up for Lent: my New Year's resolutions.

Henny Youngman