Top 43 Seinfeld Tv Show Quotes
#1. I started a radio show where I interviewed comics.And I interviewed Leno and Seinfeld and John Candy and Father Guido Sarducci and Garry Shandling, all when I was 16.And they kind of told me what to do.
Judd Apatow
#2. Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem. Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash.
Jerry Seinfeld
#3. There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men don't think there's a lot they don't know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, 'I know what I'm doing, just show me somebody naked.'
Jerry Seinfeld
#5. And Seinfeld is so quick: we crank out one show a week, and the hours are very reasonable.
Julia Louis-Dreyfus
#6. Science advances funeral by funeral
Max Planck
#7. [W]omen under phallocratic rule are confined to the role of vessels/carriers, directed and controlled by men. Since that role is the basic base reversal of the very be-ing of Voyaging/Spiraling women, when we direct our own Crafts/Vessels we become reversers of that deadly reversal.
Mary Daly
#8. We sold 'Seinfeld' all over the world but it was a very specific kind of show. In some countries it went down really well, in others they hated it.
Jerry Seinfeld
#9. I've never seen 'Seinfeld', never seen 'The Cosby Show'; I just don't watch it. I saw half of 'Oprah' one time. I'd rather read.
August Wilson
#10. We don't have a laugh track, which helped Seinfeld a lot, and did kind of tell people when to laugh. It just made it a lot easier. Our show doesn't have that, so it's hard for Middle America to catch on.
Alia Shawkat
#11. When you make a TV show, they always say you're a guest in someone's home. Online, you're a guest in someone's face. So that's why I try to make it sound and look and feel very inviting and attractive, because I know that I'm in your face.
Jerry Seinfeld
#12. In terms of 'Seinfeld', I think there's lot of reality in a show that's supposed to be about nothing.
Wale
#13. It's always interesting for me to watch the pilot of an established show because you see how the writers and actors weren't really sure what the show was and what the dynamics were. If you look at the pilot for 'Seinfeld,' for example, it's practically unrecognizable.
Johnny Galecki
#14. You know what else he said?" Anne Marie asked.
"Tell me," I said. I didn't want to know, of course, but she was going to tell me anyway, so why not invite in the inevitable, which is why, in the movies, vampires have to be asked inside by their victims and always are.
Brock Clarke
#15. I like 'The Office.' I particularly like the British version with Ricky Gervais. Of course, I liked the 'Seinfeld' show a lot. I thought that was an awfully good show.
Dick Van Dyke
#16. It is said that he was the first of Men to reach the Great Sea, and that none, save the Eldar, have ever felt more deeply the longing that it brings.
J.R.R. Tolkien
#17. To me, in retrospect, it was amazing that 'Seinfeld' was a show that had such mass appeal. At first it was a disaster in the ratings, but then it became a cultural phenomenon. I don't know if that's possible anymore, but I don't try for that.
Bill Lawrence
#18. When the messenger arrives and says 'Don't shoot the messenger,' it's a good idea to be prepared to shoot the messenger, just in case.
Howard Tayler
#19. No one achieves greatness by becoming a generalist. You don't hone a skill by diluting your attention to its development. The only way to get to the next level is focus.
John C. Maxwell
#20. All magic is 'Here's a quarter, now it's gone. You're a jerk. Now it's back. You're an idiot. Show's over.'
Jerry Seinfeld
#21. (I'm a child of the wired generation, unlike some of the suits hereabouts who have their secretaries print everything out and dictate their replies for an audio-typist to send.)
Charles Stross
#22. A body can only deliver up the truth its bones know, Its blood, which is its history.
Catherynne M Valente
#23. Airline hostesses show you how to use a seatbelt in case you haven't been in a car since 1965.
Jerry Seinfeld
#24. Nobody enjoys the 'little show about nothing' humor more than me, but that is never the way I look at it.
Jerry Seinfeld
#25. When the 'Seinfeld' show said it was going to be a show about nothing, everybody said it couldn't - wouldn't work. It did. 'Thor' is about something, about that character finding his destiny, but it's not doing what was expected ... and yet it's doing very well.
J. Michael Straczynski
#27. I will never understand why they cook on TV. I can't smell it. Can't eat it. Can't taste it. The end of the show they hold it up to the camera, 'Well, here it is. You can't have any. Thanks for watching. Goodbye.'
Jerry Seinfeld
#28. I do not know why anyone would host an awards show. No matter how unbelievably well you do at it, the only thing that can happen is you get asked again to host an awards show.
Jerry Seinfeld
#29. Lots of people go through life not having the slightest idea what names to put in the blanks on their "Who Am I?" work sheets, and they aren't bothered in the least by it.
Meg Cabot
#30. The only way a show works is you find people who you think are qualified and talented and you give them a chance to do what they do.
Jerry Seinfeld
#31. There are very few people who really appreciate my shows. People come to the show and they pay and they enjoy it, but I don't really think most people really understand what they've seen.
Jerry Seinfeld
#32. Seinfeld was typically American in that show. He was a pretty funny guy, but he had no sense of style. Tacky like a Texan tux. Tasteless dressing and tasteful jokes. That's Seinfeld for me. I would have preferred it the other way around.
Hallgrimur Helgason
#33. Nd looking up into Abednego's face she fought a battle inside herself with the thing that it was, a sort of grabbing thing, and then she held Gertrude out to him. "You have her," she said.
Elizabeth Goudge
#34. I watch sitcoms like Seinfeld, and here's a newsflash, but what a great show.
Scott Wolf
#35. I learned a long time ago from when I did 'Seinfeld' never to take anything seriously, and to be part of the joke is the best way to show what a good sport I was.
Marlee Matlin
#36. You have to understand how the human eye behaves when it views a scene for the first time. Work with that knowledge, and your paintings will have more drama and will evoke strong reactions.
Mike Svob
#37. I only do a show when there's somebody I want to talk to.
Jerry Seinfeld
#38. I grew up watching Letterman, 'Seinfeld,' 'SNL,' and Monty Python movies. But nothing made me want to get into comedy more than when 'Mr. Show' started airing.
Joe Mande
#39. I was a rabid 'Seinfeld' fan. Then I did the show, and it ruined the show for me. Not that it ruined the quality of the show, but I had seen behind the curtain at Oz.
William Earl Brown
#40. Properly directed thoughts result in properly directed actions. The only way to appropriately guide our thoughts is to know their foundation, our values.
Chris Matakas
#41. BY 2013, SEINFELD WOULD BECOME the most successful show ever in syndication. Networks buy reruns in packages sold in "cycles," and Seinfeld was the first show in history to get to a fifth cycle, taking its rerun sales through 2017 - nearly twenty years since its finale.
Jennifer Keishin Armstrong
#42. If Americans in 2100 came to see 12 meters sea-level rise as inevitable by 2200, who can even begin to fathom how the nation would respond?
Joseph J. Romm
#43. In our first season we had a 22 rating. Today Seinfeld, a hit show, gets a 15. Lost in Space actually had a bigger audience than Star Trek got at that time.
Mark Goddard
