Top 100 Quotes About Jerry
#1. But my agent has a theory. She says every marriage is jerry-rigged. Even the ones that look reasonable from the outside are held together inside with chewing gum and wire and string.
Jenny Offill
#2. I suppose there won't be any Mexican food in the whites-only homeland,' I said.
Hm, I'd never thought of that possibility' Jerry said. He paused. 'They wouldn't be allowed to vote but they could cook and clean for us. Afterall, we're not extremists.
Louis Theroux
#3. Some labeled Jerry Falwell an American version of the Ayatollah Khomeni. People for the American Way, a group organized to counter the Moral Majority, launched a slick media campaign attaching the Nazi slur to the religious right.
Charles Colson
#4. Well damn, I guess I've had a few threesomes and foursomes too. However, I don't really think that having Ben and Jerry ice cream and umm...BOB, your battery operated boyfriend, constitute as a real threesome or foursome.
Dee Dinh
#5. Jerry (Rice) played until he was 42. At 39, I ran a 4.43 40-yard dash. You look at the number of dropped balls and the way guys are playing now and you can't honestly say I can't do better.
Terrell Owens
#6. I was very keen on people like Elvis, Carl Perkins, Jerry Lee Lewis, and Gene Vincent.
Robin Trower
#7. The music is an important and crucial part to an animated film. You don't think about it, but you can watch Tom and Jerry with no words, for hours, and the music dictates the emotion and where the story is going and how you're supposed to feel. Everything is in the music.
Rihanna
#8. Next time we need to be on drugs and have lots of suffering and alcohol abuse going on while recording, I'm kinda picturing a Jerry Lee Lewis session from the mid Seventies.
Jim Diamond
#9. In a way, it's my way of dealing with, finding closure with Grateful Dead music, and giving thanks in a way to Jerry and Bob and all the guys in the band for making up this wonderful music.
Phil Lesh
#10. Her voice rose to a Vincent Price octave. Yes, I'm wandering the earth, seeking revenge on Ben and Jerry for giving me the fat ass and massive coronary. And I give out love advice to the tragically lonely.
Molly Harper
#11. Getting back to the point, a guy like Jerry, he deals with the business, and he doesn't see it as being evil or ugly, it's what you have to do, and I mean I know there's some really ugly parts to it and parts which drive me nuts, but not in the same way as music business.
Trevor Rabin
#12. Jerry picked up the technique of visualizing the story as a movie scenario; and whenever he gave me a script, I would see it as a screenplay. That was the technique that Jerry used, and I just picked it up.
Joe Shuster
#13. When Little Richard used to stand up and play it was just fabulous, and Liberace had the candlesticks and the rings and the gift of the gab. The piano's is the most ungainly rock' n' roll instrument of all time but those two people transcended it, as did Jerry Lee Lewis.
Elton John
#14. I ended up taking Ben & Jerry and the Gallo brothers home that night, so it was a real orgy, if a very maudlin and self-indulgent one.
Amelia C. Gormley
#15. One of my greatest personal heroes is Jerry Lopez. When you can snowboard like he surfs, you'll be there!
Frederick Lenz
#16. A new sickness invaded Jerry, the sickness of knowing what he had become, another animal, another beast, another violent person in a violent world, inflicting damage, not disturbing the universe but damaging it.
Robert Cormier
#17. I like the Stooges. You know what movie I saw that I sort of discovered late was Jerry Lewis in 'The Nutty Professor'. I really liked that.
Mike Judge
#18. Jerry Falwell can go straight to hell - and I mean that in a Christian way.
Jimmy Carter
#19. We got on American Bandstand, where kids would dance to a record and then rate it. We called ourselves Tom and Jerry. I was Jerry.
Paul Simon
#20. When it comes to English stand-up comedy, Indians have only seen the best - Jerry Seinfeld, Bill Cosby and the like. So, when someone claims to be an English stand-up comedian in India, he'd better be very good if he's going to make a life of it.
Vir Das
#21. Jerry Weintraub, the producer, might be a pain in the ass, but he really knows how to treat his actors.
Bernie Mac
#22. Jerry read for a good hour before he couldn't take any more of the graphic heterosexual love scenes. "Some
Eric Arvin
#23. When I turned about 14, I developed a friendship with this guy whose mom was the secretary to Ernest Angley, the faith healer, who's very popular in the Midwest. He had a television show, and he was sort of like Liberace mixed with Jerry Falwell - very glitzy, very high-tech.
Marilyn Manson
#24. Some people have made a fortune by being employed. Jerry Bruckheimer does not own his content. Warner Bros. owns his shows. They are on CBS, and he makes a fortune.
Henry Blodget
#25. Jerry Ford is so dumb he can't walk and chew gum at the same time ... He's a nice fellow, but he spent too much time playing football without a helmet.
Lyndon B. Johnson
#26. I think when I was young, let's call it high school, and even before that, I just loved comedy, and I loved comedians. I grew up watching Laurel and Hardy. That's really a long time ago. I loved Jerry Lewis. I just loved comedians.
Steve Martin
#28. Jerry reversed the usual formula of the superhero who goes to another planet. He put the superhero in ordinary, familiar surroundings, instead of the other way around, as was done in most science fiction. That was the first time I can recall that it had ever been done.
Joe Shuster
#29. If you could see the instructions that I gave Jerry to begin with, I'd be embarrassed.
Tim LaHaye
#30. I wish I'd done 'Dumb and Dumber.' I was offered the part, but I don't think I'd have been better than Jeff Daniels was. Another film I wish I'd done was 'Jerry Maguire.'
Woody Harrelson
#31. The laws against public nudity make no sense. The idea that Jerry Falwell can go topless while Cindy Crawford cannot is an absolute affront to logic, common sense and the 5000 year human struggle for aesthetic taste.
Peter McWilliams
#32. Many people we consider legends, such as Jerry Lee Lewis and Chuck Berry, remain so scarred by scandals, injustices and regrets from decades earlier that they're barely able to appreciate their accomplishments.
Neil Strauss
#33. Jerry Robinson illustrated some of the defining images of pop culture's greatest icons. As an artist myself, it's impossible not to feel humbled by his body of work. Everyone who loves comics owes Jerry a debt of gratitude for the rich legacy that he leaves behind.
Jim Lee
#34. You know how is it when you love someone? And the hard part, the bad part, the Jerry Springer Show part is that you never stop loving someone. There's always a piece of them in your heart.
Neil Gaiman
#35. Jerry Springer' is just kind of the chubby, redneck version of throwing Christians to the lions.
Hal Sparks
#36. On 'The Guiding Light' I enjoyed working with Jamie Goodwin and Ellen Parker, who played my sister. I loved working with Jerry Ver Dorn and Jay Hammer. I mean, there's some great fun people that I've really enjoyed.
Kassie DePaiva
#37. I personally have dealt with any adversity in my life with humor. That's why I told America to 'Read my hips!' on 'Dancing With the Stars' or was happy to play along with Jason Alexander and Jerry Seinfeld in the great restaurant scene on 'Seinfeld.'
Marlee Matlin
#38. Jerry Bruckheimer creates comedy, he just doesn't realize because he's a turd.
Trey Parker
#39. Ben & Jerry's ice cream will try to make some marijuana ice cream, resulting in thousands of people simultaneously getting and curing ice cream headaches.
Peter Sagal
#40. Mir astronaut Jerry Linenger writes in his memoir that he was surprised to find a bottle of cognac in one arm of his spacesuit and a bottle of whiskey in the other. (Linenger was the Frank Burns of space exploration:
Mary Roach
#41. Dr. Kissinger was a former child. Jerry Ford was a former child. Even F.D.R. was a former child. I retired from the movies in 1949, and I'm still a former child.
Shirley Temple
#42. Atlantic's Jerry Wexler believes first-rate records are made by first-rate voices. He certainly has worked with enough of them: Clyde McPhatter, Joe Turner, La Vern Baker, Ray Charles, Otis Redding, Solomon Burke, Wilson Pickett and Aretha Franklin.
Jon Landau
#43. I love 'Jerry Maguire.' I absolutely love it.
James Corden
#44. I don't want to be in the Jerry Sandusky business.
Bob Costas
#45. What I love more than anything is Jerry Goldsmith's 80's music and Bernard Herrmann's genre music from the 50's and 60's.
Bear McCreary
#46. Hell and damnation, life is such fun with a ragged greatcoat and a Jerry gun!
Alexander Blok
#47. Jerry shifted the clipboard to his side as he rested his fists on his hips, as though to attest to his in-chargeness.
Nina Post
#48. Whenever I catch a chunk of an Adam Sandler comedy on cable, it looks as badly shot and goofily tossed off as a Jerry Lewis gag reel once he hit the late downslide with 'Hardly Working' and 'Cracking Up.'
James Wolcott
#49. President Bush has delivered a new resolution to the U.N. saying that Saddam has failed to cooperate with U.N. resolutions, freeing us to get our war on. Don't mess with us France, or we'll send Jerry Lewis to Iraq as a human shield.
Craig Kilborn
#50. I can't deny that Jerry Springer supposedly beating us didn't affect me. There was a point where I felt like, Golly, you work so hard, you try so hard and the people say they want meaningful television and then Jerry Springer ends up beating you. It was disturbing.
Oprah Winfrey
#51. I'm no Jerry Seinfeld. I wasn't raised with some backyard with a creek and trees and all that.
Tracy Morgan
#52. It was a cheap school, you know, and the teachers weren't very good. They could never answer questions properly."
"Very few teachers can," I{Jerry}said.
"Why not? They ought to."
I agreed.
Agatha Christie
#53. Television has changed how we choose our leaders. It elected Ronald Reagan and a host of Kennedy-look-alike congressmen with blow-dried hair and gleaming teeth. It destroyed Senator Joe McCarthy by showing him in action and it created Jerry Falwell.
Ronald Steel
#54. Jerry Lawler walks in here with his crown - DA DA DUM - Imperial Margerine - and talks about what he's going to do to me. Lawler, if you think you're going to beat me, if you think you can do ANYTHING to me, than you really are the king. King of FOOLS, jack!!
Roddy Piper
#55. Jerry Seinfeld made a puddle, I stepped in it, and wonderful things happened.
Jason Alexander
#56. When William came to Kyle's aid, he told them that there's nothing wrong with being gay, and that his Uncle Jerry is gay, and that the boys should just-" Lenore smiled a little. "uh... 'cowboy up'.
D.W. Marchwell
#57. If I had the gift of Jerry Seinfeld, of Bill Cosby, of Lewis Black, these instinctively brilliant comic minds, then you go that route! But you gotta know your limitations. I'm more of an actor, more of a process guy. I did Tom Snyder, just as Danny Aykroyd did on 'SNL.' I did it in the club.
Joe Piscopo
#59. I wasn't going to let Jerry Sloan embarrass me, because basketball had a proper role in my life. I suspected my basketball philosophy wasn't the bottom line anyway.
John Amaechi
#60. What's wrong with Shakespeare?" I{Jerry} inquired in interest.
" Twisting himself up to say things in such a difficult way that you can't get at what he means. Still, I like some Shakespeare.
Agatha Christie
#61. Jerry and I always felt that the character was enjoying himself. He was having fun: he wasn't taking himself seriously. It was always a lark for him, as you can see in my early drawings.
Joe Shuster
#62. Back when Jerry Seinfeld was just another comedian hanging around the clubs, I'd imitate him to amuse myself and the other comics. The club owners would say, 'What are you doing that for? Nobody knows him.'
Gilbert Gottfried
#63. Jerry: If you always want less, in words as well as things, you'll do well as a writer.
Judd Apatow
#64. One night I saw Jerry Lee, Johnny Cash, Carl Perkins, and Elvis for a dollar, if you believe that, in an open-air concert. Presley, I got to meet and go into his house and so forth. My wife says I should quit tellin' that story, 'cause they'll know how old I am.
William Sanderson
#65. She didn't quite know how to translate faces; so she wondered about Jerry, but that's all she could do.
Abby Slovin
#66. What defines greatness is when you hold all the records and what you mean to your fans, on and off the field, because that is who ranks you as the greatest receiver of all-time. The guy that holds all the records, the guy that has set the stage for all of us, you have to give it to Jerry Rice.
Donald Driver
#67. It was not a friendly game, and Jerry certainly did not have friendliness in his eyes. He had an extra mean streak that day. He was out of control and probably should have been ejected.
Roger Staubach
#68. When you strip it all away, Jerry Garcia
(former Grateful Dead guitarist) destroyed his life on
drugs. And yet hes being honored, like some godlike
figure. Our priorities are out of whack, folks.
Rush Limbaugh
#69. Ben & Jerry's is an indulgent dessert that should be eaten in moderation. You should not be replacing more than one meal a day with ice cream. We do not consider a pint or a tub of ice cream to be a single serving.
Jerry Greenfield
#70. I've been watching 'Pawn Stars' every week for the last year. I like learning about the history behind the items that people bring into the pawnshop. I actually pawned a ring once that a woman sent to me while I was on 'Jerry Springer.' It was really gaudy.
Steve Wilkos
#71. Jerry Falwell says, on Pat Robertson's program, that the reason we got attacked on 9/11 is that we were accommodating the ACLU and abortion and homosexuals and feminists in America, so God smacked us down.
John Shelby Spong
#72. I used to pretend that I was Tom attacking Jerry, who was drawn on the ball.
Monica Seles
#73. Once Joe Paterno learned that his former assistant coach Jerry Sandusky was showering with a young boy in the Penn State football locker room, he had two choices: think of the child as his own and call police. Or not. He chose the latter.
Christine Pelosi
#74. I've always wanted to play Jerry Seinfeld's son, actually, because he's the only person who anyone ever says I look like, in my entire - ever in my life.
Paulo Costanzo
#75. In the end we're all Jerry Springer Show guests, really, we just haven't been on the show.
Marilyn Manson
#76. [Comedian Jerry Seinfeld was nominated for a Grammy for his spoken-word children's album] Halloween ... Don't Give Up on Me.
Jamie Lee Curtis
#77. What Jerry has done, in a masterful way, is go through and select portions of the Scripture and put words in Jesus' mouth that are legitimate because they already appear in the Bible.
Tim LaHaye
#78. Jerry thought about what a letter of recommendation from a council of wizards would look like in his resume file.
"Totally secret," he said firmly.
Rick Cook
#79. Jerry Bruckheimer really is an executive producer, who obviously is the most successful producer in the history of film and television.
Dylan McDermott
#80. If there are princes involved, you should stay out of their way." Jerry's smile softened his hard-as-nails persona. "I wish I could." I smiled my own half-hearted smile. "Maybe they should stay outta my way?" He chuckled, the sound of his laughter soft and delicious. "Maybe.
Pippa DaCosta
#81. A Madagascar Hissing Roach chasing Jerry Lewis. That would be a really neat treat.
Michael O'Donoghue
#82. A terrific sadness swept over Jerry. As if somebody had died. The way he felt standing in the cemetry that day they buried his mother. And nothing you could do about it.
Robert Cormier
#83. My daughter made me a Jerry Springer-watching kit, with crackers, Cheez Whiz, polyester stretch pants and a T-shirt with two fat women fighting over a skinny guy.
Roseanne Barr
#84. You know, we - if, for example, Jerry Brown can withstand, you know, what will probably end up being $200 million of spending by his opponent and get elected governor of California, that will be a big victory in the nation's largest state.
David Axelrod
#85. Her one big cheat had been and always would be Ben and Jerry's Cherry Garcia; she simply could not see a world without it!
Julia Mills
#86. Detective Comics first appeared in 1937. Superman, written and drawn by Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster, made his debut in Action Comics #1 in June 1938. Superman was unstoppable; soon, a million Superman comics were being sold every month.45
Jill Lepore
#87. I have total respect for the self-contained rock artist. Whether you're dealing with Jerry Garcia or Lou Reed or Patti Smith or a Whitney or an Aretha, they know what they want with their career.
Clive Davis
#88. Jerry [Garcia] got high and Jerry's dead. I went hunting and I'm still Ted.
Ted Nugent
#89. Jerry Goldsmith is an artist who meets all the demands upon the composer in films. He communicates, integrates, subordinates, supports, and designs with discipline.
Jerry Goldsmith
#90. In 1974, the modeling world changed. Jerry Ford and my lawyer negotiated the deal for the first exclusive contract in modeling history.
Lauren Hutton
#91. Jerry Seinfeld has an interesting theory. He goes, '20 pounds up or down, and you lose your funny.'
Jason Alexander
#92. Only men you can count on these days are Ben and Jerry.
Janet Evanovich
#93. Like everything else I'd seen at Xymos, it was jerry-built, half-baked, concocted in a hurry to solve present problems and never a thought to the future.
Michael Crichton
#94. Gypsies at home watching Jerry Falwell on TV, might mean something to you, it ain't nothing to me.
Tom Petty
#95. When the fearsome foursome of rock music, Chuck Berry, Bo Diddley, Little Richard, and Jerry Lee Lewis, decided to show up in Toronto for a rock and roll festival, I knew we had to go there to try to get them all on film.
D. A. Pennebaker
#96. Ray Bannister started to build the guillotine the day Jerry Renault returned to Monument.
Robert Cormier
#97. Jerry Coleman was the kind of player who made me proud to wear the pinstripes.
Joe Torre
#98. Dear Lord, thank you for introducing me to my two favorite men in the world ... Ben and Jerry. I hope you aren't offended by this threesome.
Sawyer Bennett
#99. There is not a sentence in the world that could respectfully do justice to the life and music of Jerry Garcia.
Branford Marsalis
#100. I'll work with Jerry Seinfeld any day of the week. Get a nice little paycheck there, but you do it for free. It's just good to be associated with that man. He's a great guy.
Patrick Warburton
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