Quotes About A New Dog

#1. I got a new dog. He's a paranoid retriever. He brings back everything because he's not sure what I threw him.

Steven Wright

#2. Oh wow, there's another fly on the wall! Look, there's a new dog sleeping on the sidewalk. Yippee.

R.J. Palacio

#3. A new dog never replaces an old dog, it merely expands the heart.

Erica Jong

#4. When looking to adopt a new dog, the most important thing to consider is always the energy of the dog and how the dog will fit in with your lifestyle and your family.

Cesar Millan

#5. Jesse has a new dog. You may have noticed that his former pets have been peculiarly unfortunate. When this dog dies every employee in the White House will be at once discharged.

Ulysses S. Grant

#6. Our experience with newly-minted MBAs has not been that great. Their academic records always look terrific and the candidates always know just what to say; but too often they are short on personal commitment to the company and general business savvy. It's difficult to teach a new dog old tricks.

Warren Buffett

#7. I like dogs considerably more than I like humans. That doesn't make me antihuman; there are plenty of humans I'm very fond of. But generally speaking, if I simultaneously meet a new human and a new dog, I'm going to like the dog more. I'm certainly going to trust the dog more.

David Rosenfelt

#8. I know part of my sorrow is just disguised self-pity, I needed that exchange and I worry how I'll cope without it and whether I can replace it - if only it were as easy as buying a new dog.

William Boyd

#9. Now, with Annie gone, I'm looking for a new dog. I have a lot of duck hunting planned, and I can't imagine doing it without a dog. I'm 84, so I won't get a puppy.

Bud Grant

#10. Dogs come into our lives to teach us about love and loyalty. They depart to teach us about loss. A new dog never replaces an old dog; it merely expands the heart. If you have loved many dogs, your heart is very big.

Erica Jong

#11. New Rule: A dog is the only animal that can get you laid. No offense, parrot guy, but it's not gonna happen. When women see you, they're not thinking, "I bet that guy is interesting," they're thinking, "That bird better not shit on my dress.

Bill Maher

#12. In New Orleans, where I'm from, the average household income, with two working parents, two kids, a dog and a little fence is $16,000 a year, so $15,000 for a movie sounds pretty good.

Anthony Mackie

#13. A study conducted by the State University of New York at Buffalo Medical School suggested that in times of stress a dog is likely to be more help in calming you down than a spouse or partner. Most dog owners can guess the reason why: dogs never judge us and never compete with us.

Marjorie Garber

#14. I have a very, very normal life. I really do - with the exception of being very lucky and privileged. I have two children, a dog, and a husband. We live in New York, the kids go to school, and we're fortunate that we have flexible schedules. I like that. That's what I want.

Julianne Moore

#15. In coming to the Congress as a new Member and becoming a fellow Blue Dog, we have had an opportunity to share and really spend a great deal of time in examining the challenges that our Nation finds itself in in getting its fiscal house in order.

Jim Costa

#16. IT was said that a new person had appeared on the sea-front: a lady with a little dog.

Anton Chekhov

#17. New Rule: If you're one of the one-in-three married women who say your pet is a better listener than your husband, you talk too much. And I have some bad news for you: Your dog's not listening, either; he's waiting for food to fall out of your mouth.

Bill Maher

#18. The dogs had got into the graveyard and were now moving like Hoovers across the ground, their noses down, their tails up, their small dog brains consumed with the idea of uncharted territory and a thousand new scents.

Kate Atkinson

#19. When you're working on a play like 'Sloane,' that play works; you don't have to worry about that. When you're working on a new play like 'Little Dog,' you have no clue if the play works. You're exploring.

Scott Ellis

#20. Walking around the streets with our dog is what we did all the time in Washington. Making friends with new people is something we did a lot in Washington. Traveling overseas is something that my wife Robyn and I really enjoyed together. This is really who we are.

Mark Lippert

#21. According to a new survey, 90% of men say their lover is also their best friend. Which is really kind of disturbing when you consider man's best friend is his dog.

Jay Leno

#22. There's going to be a new cable-TV channel for dogs. Dogs don't even watch TV. But the schedule came out today. And they've got great shows, like Barks & Recreation and Game of Bones.

Craig Ferguson

#23. [The] zero-sum caricature [applies] much more accurately to socialism, which stifles the creation of new wealth and thus fosters a dog-eat-dog struggle over existing material resources.

George Gilder

#24. People often assume New York City is no place to keep a dog. This is certainly what my parents told me when I was growing up there. But I have found this not to be the case at all.

Jill Abramson

#25. My very first tattoo was for my dog, Zora, who died in my arms in New York. Right where her heart stopped beating I got a "Z".

Cheyenne Jackson

#26. ROMEO: Here's the thing: when you back a wounded dog into a corner, it's going to come out fighting.

Cambria Hebert

#27. The Dog was a different matter. She was new, or so old that any book that told of her was long since dust. The creature in the fog thought the latter.

Garth Nix

#28. It's nice coming to Nashville, and we have four-bedroom house and a dog, and we go swimming a lot. We get down here and spread out a lot, and I miss my sweet tea and my cornbread and my good southern cooking - but I'm down here eating pretty for two weeks and I'm ready to go back to New York City.

Justin Townes Earle

#29. Most Americans acquire dogs impulsively and for dubious reasons: as a Christmas gift for the kids. Because they saw one in a movie. To match the new living-room furniture. Because they moved to the suburbs and see a dog as part of the package.

Jon Katz

#30. I was working like a dog as a housekeeper, barista, nanny, cook, so I could save enough money to really sit with my instruments. Whenever I had 20 minutes, I would practice a new chord or write a new verse.

Valerie June

#31. They are just really stupid people in Hollywood. You write them a script, and they say they love it, they absolutely love it. Then they say, 'But doesn't it need a small dog, and an Eskimo, and shouldn't it be set in New Guinea?' And you say, 'But it is a sophisticated romantic comedy set in Paris.'

P. J. O'Rourke

#32. I have a new little stray dog that I've had for about a month now. His name is Mikey Mohawk - he's this little terrier with a natural Mohawk. My friend found him hit by a car on Pico Boulevard.

Krysten Ritter

#33. Being cautious is new territory; my specialty was leaping, not looking. These days I pay attention. You can stumble uphill as easily as down. Ice comes in smooth and corrugated. Plastic bags are slippery underfoot. A big dog can knock you to your knees.

Abigail Thomas

#34. I might get scared of a really big dog, but I don't scare easy. As a youngster I used to watch all the scary stuff by myself, so nothing really gets to me now. There's actually a new series on TV called Hellevator and I filled out an application to be on the show because I love that type of stuff.

Andre Dirrell

#35. Total?" I called. He looked up alertly, then ran over to me, small pink tongue hanging out. Total?" I said when he was close. "Can you talk?" He flopped down on the grass, panting slightly. "Yeah. So?" Jeezum. I mean, mutant weirdos are nothing new to me, you know? But a talking dog?

James Patterson

#36. Walking with my doggy is so much fun!
And she makes me laugh, she makes me run.
Licking she likes to make some good new friends,
Kindly enough with cyclists who spin with no end.

Ana Claudia Antunes

#37. This new thinking leads away from the pack, but a dog is no dog if he does not belong.

Andre Alexis

#38. New Rule: Stop leaving couches on the sidewalk. Besides being lazy and ugly, it's animal cruelty. You teach your dog not to pee on the couch, and then when you take him to the place he's supposed to pee, there's a couch.

Bill Maher

#39. LOOK AT HIM! Mum, LOOK! OUR NEW DOG! ISN'T HE A BEAUTY?"
"Another DOG!" came Maia's amazed voice.

Sonal Panse

#40. A three-legged dog
successfully crosses the road
to a new location
where there is greener grass
to piss on

Wesley Eisold

#41. My father read 'The New York Times,' my mother did secretarial work, we had a dog, we had a garden, I had a brother.

Donna Leon

#42. Studied all year and wrote in my journal like a nun works a Rosary, dog with a new bone, bee in his hive's back room.

Dennis Vickers

#43. Before you turn over a new leaf,
dog-ear the old one;
lest you forget.

J.Z. Bingham

#44. Loving and parenting a dog as a single parent can create all sorts of new and unusual problems, but also new sources of joy.

Jenna Morasca

#45. When a boy's first romantic interlude is with Phoebe the Dog-Faced Girl, he feels a need to get out into the world and find a new life.

Annette Curtis Klause

#46. I took my dog for a walk ... all the way from New York to Florida ... I said to him "There now you're done."

Steven Wright

#47. My recipe for bliss on a Friday night consists of a 'New York Times' crossword puzzle and a new episode of 'Homicide;' Saturdays and Sundays are oriented around walks in the woods with the dog, human companion in tow some of the time but not always.

Caroline Knapp

#48. A new report says that dogs can sniff out prostate cancer with almost 98 percent accuracy. The report also finds that cats can sniff it out with 100 percent accuracy but they prefer to watch you die.

Conan O'Brien

#49. Dog rescue remains a gamble, of course. For all the good will, hard work, and noble motivation, nobody can really predict with certainty how a traumatized, dislocated dog will respond in a new environment.

Jon Katz

#50. Fall in love with a dog, and in many ways you enter a new orbit, a universe that features not just new colors but new rituals, new rules, a new way of experiencing attachment.

Caroline Knapp

#51. My fear was like a stray dog, roving the neighborhood of my life, looking for a new source of worry.

Danzy Senna

#52. The love of a dog was unconditional and unending. They never got tired of their partner and never cheated or decided they wanted to try something new with their lives. Once a dog loved you, he loved you forever.

Jordan K. Rose

#53. I pulled my suitcase out of the backseat of my bug, along with Cannoli's new travel case, a spiffy animal print pet backpack on wheels. When I first saw it, I thought maybe the dog was supposed to wear the backpack, but it turned out the person wore the backpack with the dog in it.

Claire Cook

#54. Impertinent submissive," Raoul snapped, and his dark brown eyes turned mean. "Nothing new for this one. You're doing a lousy job of bringing her to heel, Marcus."
"Bring me to heel? Like I'm a dog?" Without thinking, Gabi instinctively yanked away and snapped out, "Bite me.

Cherise Sinclair

#55. Nothing is more likely to start me screaming like a madwoman than New York in February with its piles of blackened snow full of yellow holes drilled by dogs.

Florence King

#56. Be a gold-medal multitasker. You should be able to discuss the new Ludacris video while correcting the merchandising spreadsheets, picking the right shade of snakeskin for next season's mini-purses and catching the dog at the same time!

Kimora Lee Simmons

#57. Actually, the suburbs are far more sinister places than most city dwellers imagine. Their very blandness forces the imagination into new areas. I mean, one's got to get up in the morning thinking of a deviant act, merely to make certain of one's freedom. It needn't be much; kicking the dog will do.

J.G. Ballard

#58. It came to me that every time I lose a dog they take a piece of my heart with them. And every new dog who comes into my life gifts me with a piece of their heart. If I live long enought, all the components of my heart will be dog, and I will become as generous and loving as they are.

Unknown Author 909

#59. What's so funny?" Bella mumbled.
"I got food in her hair," I told her, chortling again.
"I'm not going to forget this, dog," Rosalie hissed.
"S'not so hard to erase a blond's memory," I countered. "Just blow in her ear."
Get some new jokes, "Rosalie snapped.

Stephenie Meyer

#60. It's too late Savannah, you already let Carlos grow into a full-grown dog. You should have trained his ass when he was a puppy, when the pussy was still new to him. Now, now he's gonna continue to shit in the house no matter how many times you rub his nose into it.

Fabiola Joseph

#61. small dachshund tore into his backyard carrying something in his mouth. The dog stopped about ten feet in front of him, and they stared each other down. Too well groomed to be a stray, it probably belonged to his nearest neighbor, a new renter who'd just moved in.

Shelly Alexander

#62. I've always loved dogs and have had one since I was three. We bought her from a kid selling puppies out of a cardboard box on the street where we lived in New York City. Great dog. We named her 'Marcella' after a Raggedy Ann character. She grew up with us.

Bob Peterson

#63. It was like living in a new house. I saw the undersides of tables, walked through the tangle of chair legs. It would be good to be a dog, I thought. You would feel safe surrounded by all of these leggy objects that never tried to run away.

Augusten Burroughs

#64. I'm a film buff and I was keen to find out about the response to Daniel Craig's 007. 'Empire' and 'Hot Dog' had great reviews, and finally he's been accepted as the new Bond. So many millions go into that franchise that if you make a mistake, it's awful.

Burn Gorman

#65. I was in New York and I walked into this pet store and came out with a dog.

Beverley Mitchell

#66. Objects of every sort are materials for the new art: paint, food, chairs, electric and neon lights, smoke, water, old socks, a dog, movies, a thousand other things which will be discovered by the present generation of artists ...

Allan Kaprow