Top 100 Palin's Quotes
#1. Sarah Palin's whole family got into a drunken public fistfight. Something police are calling a 'tragic case of trash-on-trash violence.'
Bill Maher
#2. Sarah Palin's book is big, 400 pages. She wrote the book herself and agonized over every word, and so will you.
David Letterman
#3. The New Oxford Dictionary has declared Sarah Palin's word 'refudiate' to be the 2010 Word of the Year. Palin was honored and said she would do her best to 'dismangle' the English language.
Conan O'Brien
#4. Sarah Palin's real quality is that she is her own best creation.
Julianne Moore
#5. The United States ranks 14th in the world in education. Even if we subtract Sarah Palin's test scores, it only bumps us to third. Damn you, Finland!
Christopher Titus
#6. John McCain's choice of Sarah Palin as running mate is the towering example of his poor judgment. Palin's ignorance of public affairs is monumental.
Edgar Bronfman, Sr.
#7. We're in Sarah Palin's 'targeted' list, but the thing is that the way she has it depicted, we're in the crosshairs of a gun sight over our district. When people do that, they've got to realize that there are consequences to that action.
Gabrielle Giffords
#8. I think people ultimately reveal themselves to everybody. I think that's the case with Sarah Palin's conduct, particularly after the Tucson shooting, I think she's sort of digging herself into a hole. I hope - I really hope.
Patti Davis
#9. Nobody with an IQ higher than emergency-room temperature could ever believe that 'death panels' would be appointed to nudge the elderly toward euthanasia. Yet for idle entertainment, it's hard to beat Sarah Palin's ignorant nattering on the subject.
Carl Hiaasen
#10. Since when do the media care about the disabled? I don't remember a lot of gnashing of teeth when Fox's Family Guy made fun of Sarah Palin's Down syndrome child, Trig. They
Ann Coulter
#11. (Sarah Palin's) greatest hypocrisy is in her pretense that she is a woman.
Wendy Doniger
#12. Todd Palin's frequent presence in the governor's office led some in Juneau to call him the 'Shadow Governor.' But it had never been clear, at least to the public, what roles he played.
Bill Dedman
#13. This week Sarah Palin's memoir became a bestseller. It's not even out yet. It's being translated into English.
Bill Maher
#14. I'll show you Obama's birth certificate when you show me Sarah Palin's high school diploma.
Bill Maher
#15. For some reason, the Secret Service revealed this, that Sarah Palin's Secret Service code name is 'Denali.' Turns out 'Denali' is an old Eskimo name that means 'Dan Quayle.'
Jay Leno
#16. I'm thankful for Sarah Palin's vice presidential bid, which taught us that Alaska is not in a box off the coast of California.
Paula Poundstone
#17. In Sarah Palin's new book, she says when she first laid eyes on her future husband, she said out loud, 'Thank you, God,' which is the same thing the Democrats said when they first laid eyes on Sarah Palin.
Conan O'Brien
#18. The federal government ... announced a plan to spend, like, a trillion of taxpayer dollars to buy out bad mortgages and debt. Wall Street was surprisingly enthusiastic about the plan to save their (butts) with other peoples' money. It was either that, or Sarah Palin's idea to sell it all on eBay.
Bill Maher
#19. People know something has gone terribly wrong with our government and it has gotten so far off track. But people also know that there is nothing wrong in America that a good old-fashioned election can't fix.
Sarah Palin
#20. Sarah Palin is brilliant. She is a media magnet and a media magnate. She creates headlines and draws crowds wherever she goes, whether it's 98 degrees in the desert of Arizona or below freezing in the snow of Wisconsin.
Mark McKinnon
#21. There's a new children's book that's coming out that features Sarah Palin as a hero. I don't want to give away the ending, but we finally find out who shot Bambi's mother.
Conan O'Brien
#22. Sarah Palin is a figure of fun on the American left, easily lampooned as a know-nothing, gun-toting ex-beauty queen who loves God and the red, white and blue above pretty much anything else except for Todd, her macho husband, who races snowmobiles across the Alaskan tundra.
Jay Parini
#23. Polls? Nah ... they're for strippers and cross country skiers.
Sarah Palin
#24. In other words, Foxx represented what Sarah Palin (speaking at a campaign fundraiser in Greensboro three weeks before the election) called "the real America," by which she did not mean fallow farms and disability checks and crack.
George Packer
#25. Why is it our business whether Sarah Palin returned to her job as governor three days after her son was born, or three months? Is there a right answer?
Susan Estrich
#26. Sarah Palin has admitted she tried marijuana several years ago, but she did not like it. She said it distorted her perceptions, impaired her thinking, and she's hoping that the effects will eventually wear off.
Jay Leno
#27. Sarah Palin has managed to use her failed vice presidential run to put herself in a position of power and influence. Joe Biden won the race and he hasn't been able to put himself in a position of power and influence.
Craig Ferguson
#28. I say to the Occupy protesters - you're occupying the wrong place, you're protesting the wrong thing.
Sarah Palin
#29. Even though I don't agree with either Sarah Palin or Michele Bachmann on virtually anything, I do think the unique scrutiny - because of their gender and highlighting the potential conflict between them is a product of the media's desire for juicy storylines. I think it's inappropriate.
Debbie Wasserman Schultz
#30. New terms used like, 'overseas contingency operation' instead of the word 'war' - that reflects a worldview that is out of touch with the enemy that we face. We can't spin our way out of this threat.
Sarah Palin
#31. So how's that hopey changey stuff working out for ya?
Sarah Palin
#32. Cultural stupidity accounts for virtually every aspect of Sarah Palin, both as a person and a political icon. Which, come to think of it, may be a pretty good reason not to misunderstimate her.
Joe Bageant
#33. To reduce deficit spending and our enormous debt, you reign in spending. You cut the budget. You don't take more from the private sector and grow government with it. And that's exactly what Obama has in mind with this expiration of Bush tax cuts proposal of his.
Sarah Palin
#34. The fact that drilling won't solve every problem is no excuse to do nothing at all.
Sarah Palin
#35. It isn't fate but fecklessness that has shoved Sarah Palin to the sidelines of national politics. The real tragedy is that she's taken a lot of other serious Republican women with her.
Dee Dee Myers
#36. America's finest - our men and women in uniform, are a force for good throughout the world, and that is nothing to apologize for.
Sarah Palin
#37. In politics there are some candidates who use change to promote their careers, and then there are those like John McCain who use their careers to promote change.
Sarah Palin
#38. Sarah Palin embarrasses herself almost immediately upon opening her mouth to speak or upon moving her fingers to send messages to her dull flock.
Henry Rollins
#39. The big story today, Barack Obama was accused of insulting Sarah Palin when he criticized Republican policies by saying, you can put lipstick on a pig, but it's still a pig. Political experts say that if Obama keeps insulting Palin, he could lose the election and win a job at MSNBC.
Conan O'Brien
#40. But listening to him [Barack Obama] speak, it's easy to forget that this is a man who has authored two memoirs but not a single major law or reform - not even in the state Senate.
Sarah Palin
#41. The Republicans released their 'Pledge to America.' It's 21 pages of phony charts and bad ideas. Sarah Palin got a copy, and she said, 'How am I supposed to fit all this crap on my hand?
Bill Maher
#42. Canada needs to dismantle its public health-care system and allow private enterprise to get involved and turn a profit.
Sarah Palin
#43. I think on a national level your Department of Law there in the White House would look at some of the things that we've been charged with and automatically throw them out.
Sarah Palin
#44. It's fashionable with the Sarah Palin set to attack Harvard and treat its graduates as elitists. But if you spend any time on campus, you see students drawn from all over the world - an astonishing number these days with roots in Asia - whose chief assets are brainpower and hard work.
David Ignatius
#46. I know that we shall meet problems along the way, but I'd far rather see for myself what's going on in the world outside, than rely on newspapers, television, politicians and religious leaders to tell me what I should be thinking.
Michael Palin
#47. There is barely a country in the world where you will be completely safe.
Michael Palin
#48. I got all the Sarah Palin I need for one lifetime.
Meghan McCain
#49. I am one to believe that life starts at the moment of conception.
Sarah Palin
#50. In choosing Governor Sarah Palin as his running mate, John McCain has chosen for the future.
Rudy Giuliani
#51. They determined who got the first question by a coin toss, to which Sarah Palin said, 'Oh, what a coincidence, that's how I got picked.'
Jay Leno
#52. We need American sources of resources, we need American energy, brought to you by American ingenuity and produced by American workers.
Sarah Palin
#53. John McCain said that Barack Obama is already measuring the drapes in the White House. That's what he said. I understand Sarah Palin is already driving McCain around to look at assisted living facilities.
Jay Leno
#54. I think President Obama is trying to deceive the public in pretending that he was not a part of Congress that has made some decisions in the past that got us to where we are today.
Sarah Palin
#55. I have a big problem with people who glamorize dumbness and demonize education and intellect. And I'm giving a pretty good description of Sarah Palin right now.
Aaron Sorkin
#56. Any party that would put Sarah Palin up on a pedestal will never have my support.
Jesse Ventura
#57. I think Sarah Palin is amazing. I totally admire her.
Nadine Dorries
#58. How do you know there's not a door to heaven in the sky between Malaysia and Vietnam?
Sarah Palin
#59. Donald Trump said it was his idea for [Sarah] Palin to bring up her son at the rally.
Chris Hayes
#60. I remember queuing around the block in Sheffield when I was growing up. At that time, going to the cinema was really something special - there was something about the style of the real thing that is immeasurable nicer than multiplexes.
Michael Palin
#61. This Sarah Palin phenomenon is very curious. I think somebody watching us from Mars - they would think the country has gone insane.
Noam Chomsky
#62. I would love to go to Iran. The island of Madagascar, everyone says is pretty exotic, or the wonderful Namibian desert.
Michael Palin
#63. Folks, Sarah Palin said she could see Russia from Alaska. Mitt Romney talks like he's only seen Russia by watching 'Rocky IV.'
John F. Kerry
#64. Sometimes we're actually right when we go with our gut and stand on principle in supporting underdog candidates.
Sarah Palin
#65. To choose and be so adamant about this exact location just a block or two away from 9/11, again is that knife, it feels like.
Sarah Palin
#66. John McCain and I, and our camps, are working together to get John McCain elected.
Sarah Palin
#67. What [Sarah] Palin so beguilingly represented ... was a form of female power that was utterly digestible to those who had no intellectual or political use for actual women: feminism without the feminists.
Rebecca Traister
#68. Nuclear weaponry, of course, would be the be-all, end-all of just too many people in too many parts of our planet.
Sarah Palin
#69. George Harrison's passing was really sad, but it does make the afterlife seem much more attractive.
Michael Palin
#70. Rick Santorum said this week that his 12-year-old could out-reason me about God. Look, I am not about to debate a home-schooled 12-year-old. I have enough trouble with Sarah Palin.
Bill Maher
#71. Perhaps it's time to stop analyzing Sarah Palin as a politician. Maybe, in her own muddled way, she is at last owning up to the fact that she has been miscast. You don't need politics anymore once you've discovered that the alchemy of celebrity has turned you into a 24-carat phenomenon.
Tina Brown
#72. Do you get the feeling with Sarah Palin, in high school, she was voted least likely to write a book and most likely to burn one?
Robin Williams
#73. I am pro-life and I believe that marriage should only be between and man and a woman.
Sarah Palin
#74. For a season, a gifted speaker can inspire with his words, but for a lifetime John McCain has inspired with his deeds.
Sarah Palin
#75. I, my own damn self, am not a Tea Party supporter. I disagree with them on social liberties, our overseas wars, Obama's birthplace, Sarah Palin, and the conspicuous absence of tea at their rallies.
Penn Jillette
#76. I saw novelists as being admirable people and I thought ... I thought ... maybe, one day, I could be one of them.
Michael Palin
#77. In America, we believe that competition strengthens us.
Sarah Palin
#78. I always remind people from outside our state that there's plenty of room for all Alaska's animals - right next to the mashed potatoes.
Sarah Palin
#79. [Tax] dollars go to projects that have little or nothing to do with the public good things like fruit fly research in Paris, France. I kid you not.
Sarah Palin
#80. When we talk about fighting for our country, we're talking about our vote, our vote is our arms.
Sarah Palin
#81. Politics isn't just a game of clashing parties and competing interests. The right reason is to challenge the status quo, to serve the common good, and to leave this nation better than we found it.
Sarah Palin
#82. In fact Sarah Palin has created more jobs than Obama has. She created eleven jobs fact-checking at the AP just for the Palin autobiography.
Ann Coulter
#83. Oh, the naive Obama State Department. They say we can't kill our way out of war. Really? Tell that to the Nazis. Oh wait, you can't. They're dead. We killed 'em.
Sarah Palin
#84. Something about John Cleese was always very unsettled, I felt. There was always something else he wanted to do. He seemed constantly driven by this sense that there was a nirvana somewhere; some unique place where mind, body and soul would be utterly satisfied.
Michael Palin
#85. They say the oil spill has the potential to kill more wildlife than a Sarah Palin hunting trip.
David Letterman
#86. What the heck would the establishment know about conservatism?
Sarah Palin
#87. I need to know if she [Sarah Palin] thinks dinosaurs were here four thousand years ago ... because she's going to have the nuclear code.
Matt Damon
#88. We say keep your change, we'll keep our God, our guns, our constitution.
Sarah Palin
#89. Tomorrow, America's most famous hockey mom, Sarah Palin, will drop the ceremonial first puck at the Philadelphia Flyers game. Right afterwards, she'll get out on the ice and skate around reporters' questions, so it should be interesting.
Jay Leno
#90. I can tweet before going to bed at midnight or 1 and know that they're up and at 'em, and they're going to have to respond.
Sarah Palin
#91. What the federal government should have done is accept the assistance of foreign countries, of entrepreneurial Americans who have had solution that they wanted presented ... The Dutch and the Norwegians, they are known for dikes and for cleaning up water and for dealing with spills.
Sarah Palin
#92. I've always been blessed, or cursed, some might say, with an insatiable curiosity, a desire to find something out about a people and a place. That's where it all begins.
Michael Palin
#93. We read poems from the Oxford Book of Twentieth Century Verse. Neil insisted on spilling wine over my carpet.
Michael Palin
#94. Yes. I would like to see Alaska's infrastructure projects built sooner rather than later. The window is now while our congressional delegation is in a strong position to assist.
Sarah Palin
#95. I was not going to attack Palin just for being a woman appealing for support from other women.
Hillary Clinton
#96. My marriage has worked because I am not around much.
Michael Palin
#97. I have been unusually blessed in that I've been allowed to pursue two strands of a career that both delight me and seem to please the public.
Michael Palin
#98. I've said it since the day he made the sacrifice to hit the campaign trail: Voters crave the anti-status-quo politician. Everything about Donald Trump's campaign, it's avant-garde. He is crushing it in the polls.
Sarah Palin
#99. I worked for Sarah Palin. I have the political staffer version of P.T.S.D., so whenever I hear that she's breaking her silence, my heart stops.
Nicolle Wallace
#100. Travelling, and being paid for it, is just great.
Michael Palin
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