Money Mitch Quotes

#1. You know when you see an advertisement for a casino, and they have a picture of a guy winning money? That's false advertising, because that happens the least. That's like if you're advertising a hamburger, they could show a guy choking. "This is what happened once."

Mitch Hedberg

#2. When new technology in the classroom starts happening, some people get very excited and think of it as a panacea. It attracts very high amounts of money; it raises expectations, and those expectations aren't met.

Mitch Kapor

#3. To put a trillion dollars in context, if you spend a million dollars every day since Jesus was born, you still wouldn't have spent a trillion.

Mitch McConnell

#4. We say that anytime budgets are balanced and an ample savings account has been set aside, government should just stop collecting taxes. Better to leave that money in the pockets of those who earned it, than to let it burn a hole, as it always does, in the pockets of government.

Mitch Daniels

#5. Heaven's Way is like stretching a bow. The high is lowered and the low is raised. Excess is reduced and deficiency is replenished. Heaven's Way reduces excess and replenishes deficiency. People's Way is not so. They reduce the deficient and supply the excessive.

Laozi

#6. When business leaders ask me what they can do for Indiana, I always reply: 'Make money. Go make money. That's the first act of corporate citizenship. If you do that, you'll have to hire someone else, and you'll have enough profit to help one of those non-profits we're so proud of.'

Mitch Daniels

#7. I want to rob a bank with a BB gun. "Give me all your money or I will give you a dimple! I will be rich, you will be cute. We both win."

Mitch Hedberg

#8. Because of outdated ideas around retirement, we have put the money cart ahead of the "life" horse.

Mitch Anthony

#9. Among the weeds choking out growth and good government are the hundreds of boards, commissions, and advisory committees that have sprouted over the years. They devour time, money, and energy far beyond any real contribution they make.

Mitch Daniels

#10. it is strange, exceedingly strange, to know that one's life has been fulfilled. Yet

Ursula K. Le Guin

#11. After adding trillions to the debt on big-government policies most Americans didn't ask for and which we couldn't afford, Democratic leaders say they need more money, which they intend to take from small business, even though small businesses create the majority of new jobs.

Mitch McConnell

#12. If I had a dollar for every time I said that, I'd be making money in a very weird way.

Mitch Hedberg

#13. Our main task is not to see that people of great wealth add to it, but that those without much money have a greater chance to earn some.

Mitch Daniels

#14. A pearl in the shell does not touch the ocean. Be a pearl without a shell. a mindful flooding. a spark turned to flame. bird settling nest. love lived

Rumi

#15. What we do know is that the American people, regardless of how they feel about the abortion issue, don't think that taxpayer money ought to be used to pay for abortions.

Mitch McConnell

#16. Gwen stopped putting her money in the bag. "You're giving your father a picture of a door for his birthday?" And she'd thought Mitch marking up pages in her copy of Vogue and telling her, "This is what I'd get you for your birthday if I had money" had been cheap.

Shelly Laurenston

#17. Money is not a substitute for tenderness, and power is not a substitute for tenderness. I can tell you, as I'm sitting here dying, when you most need it, neither money nor power will give you the feeling you're looking for, no matter how much of them you have.

Mitch Albom

#18. I was a workaholic. I never stopped. I lived in fifth gear. I bought cars. I invested in stocks. I made more money than I had ever imagined.

Mitch Albom

#19. I had a Velcro wallet in a casino. That sound annoyed the hell out of me. Whenever I lost money, and I opened the wallet, it was like the sound of my addiction.

Mitch Hedberg

#20. A little man is running a jewelry store. A man runs in saying, Okay, take my watch, put on a new band, install a new battery, clean the case, install a new crystal, and tune it up. I will be back in a half hour for it. Thanks! and runs out the door. The little jeweler says, C-C-C-Come in?

Henny Youngman

#21. The only candidate pocketing big money from people who want to destroy coal is Mitch McConnell.

Alison Lundergan Grimes

#22. This is part of what a family is about, not just love. It's knowing that your family will be there watching out for you. Nothing else will give you that. Not money. Not fame. Not work.

Mitch Albom

#23. You can't make money on advertising; you just have to seed the clouds. What you're after is word of mouth.

Mitch Leigh

#24. Worst nightmares can also appear with your eyes open.

Florence Welch

#25. We [the Government] are here not as masters but as servants, we are not here to glory in power, but to attest our loyalty to the commands and restrictions laid down by our sovereign, the people of the United States, in whose name and by whose will we exercise our brief authority.

Charles Evans Hughes

#26. The money that goes into Social Security is not the government's money. it's your money. You paid for it.

Mitch McConnell