Jeeves Wooster Quotes

#1. Feminine psychology is admittedly odd, sir. The poet Pope ... "
"Never mind about the poet Pope, Jeeves."
"No, sir."
"There are times when one wants to hear all about the poet Pope and times when one doesn't."
"Very true, sir.

P.G. Wodehouse

#2. She looked like a tomato struggling for self-expression.

P.G. Wodehouse

#3. We converse as we live by repeating, by combining and recombining a few elements over and over again just as nature does when of elementary particles it builds a world.

William H Gass

#4. His brow was sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought and his air that of a man who, if he had said 'Hullo, girls', would have said it like someone in a Russian drama announcing that Grandpapa had hanged himself in the barn.

P.G. Wodehouse

#5. I mean, imagine how some unfortunate Master Criminal would feel, on coming down to do a murder at the old Grange, if he found that not only was Sherlock Holmes putting in the weekend there, but Hercule Poirot, as well." ~ Bertram "Bertie" Wooster

P.G. Wodehouse

#6. Wooster: Wait a second; this white mess jacket is brand new.
Jeeves: I assumed it had got into your wardrobe by mistake, sir, or else it had been placed there by your enemies.

P.G. Wodehouse

#7. I used to love 'Jeeves And Wooster.' That theme tune was great. I remember writing to them when I was little to get the music so I could learn it on the piano, and they sent me the sheet music.

Lydia Leonard

#8. I don't know if you have had the same experience, but the snag I always come up against when I'm telling a story is this dashed difficult problem of where to begin it.

P.G. Wodehouse

#9. I can be a regular bitch. Just try me.

Stieg Larsson

#10. Samara wasn't sure how they'd respond to an angel that liked Hell better than Heaven.

R. Woodrose

#11. He looked at me like Lillian Gish coming out of a swoon.
"Is this Bertie Wooster talking?" he said, pained.
"Yes, it jolly well is!"
"Bertie, old man," said Bingo, patting me gently here and there, "reflect! We were at school - "
"Oh, all right!

P.G. Wodehouse

#12. We are bonded now. We will face it together. Your destiny is mine as well. We shall live or die together.

Melissa De La Cruz

#13. Look in at the Drones and ask the first fellow you meet 'Can the fine spirit of the Woosters be crushed?' and he will offer you attractive odds against such a contingency.

P.G. Wodehouse

#14. Yes, sir,' said Jeeves in a low, cold voice, as if he had been bitten in the leg by a personal friend.

P.G. Wodehouse

#15. This was not Aunt Dahlia, my good and kindly aunt, but my Aunt Agatha, the one who chews broken bottles and kills rats with her teeth.

P.G. Wodehouse

#16. Solitary pleasures will always exist, but for most human beings, the most pleasurable activities almost always involve sharing something: music, food, liquor, drugs, gossip, drama, beds.

David Graeber

#17. What I'm worrying about is what Tom is going to say when he starts talking."
"Uncle Tom?"
"I wish there was something else you could call him except 'Uncle Tom,' " Aunt Dahlia said a little testily. "Every time you do it, I expect to see him turn black and start playing the banjo.

P.G. Wodehouse

#18. She's a sort of human vampire-bat

P.G. Wodehouse