Humor Reading Poem Quotes

#1. I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything.

Steven Wright

#2. Billie Katherine Lourd Is the daughter of Carrie Fisher and Brian Lourd. She thinks she would do a good job playing Princess Leia. But really, she wouldn't. -Anonymous

Anonymous

#3. Before we can know God and understand his great plan it is first necessary for us to believe that he exists and that he rewards all who diligently seek him.

Joseph Franklin Rutherford

#4. Nothing says "I'm sexy" like appearing as if you've just blown the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man.

Dana Marie Bell

#5. Contrary to popular misconception, Islam does not mean peace but rather means submission to the commands of Allah alone. Therefore, Muslims do not believe in the concept of freedom of expression, as their speech and actions are determined by divine revelation and not based on people's desires.

Anjem Choudary

#6. I couldn't let him go.
I didn't want to let him go.
Letting him go meant acknowledging that he would never come back. And I just couldn't. I needed him too much.
I loved him too much.

Rachel Higginson

#7. Arms is a profession that, if its principles are adhered to for success, requires an officer do what he fears may be wrong, and yet, according to military experience, must be done, if success is to be attained.

Stonewall Jackson

#8. As far as fidelity is concerned, there is no animal in the world as treacherous as man.

Michel De Montaigne

#9. It was probably the biggest accomplishment of my life.

Jerome Bettis

#10. The friends you meet over forty are really juicy. They are highly emulsified and full of flavor. Now that you're starting to have a sense of who you are, you know better what kind of friend you want and need.

Amy Poehler

#11. I began with small roles in successful movies like 'No Country For Old Men' by the Coen brothers; but it was 'The Last Exorcism' that changed my life: with what I earned, I left Texas and moved to Los Angeles.

Caleb Landry Jones

#12. The implication was reasonably clear; I condemned him, and his minions would be round promptly to cut off my nipples and burn Jared's warehouse. I licked dry lips, cursing Louis. Why couldn't he just have wanted my body?

Diana Gabaldon

#13. Within the grand scale of things, sitting in a classroom day after day is so utterly meaningless and pointless that it actually makes his chest hurt to think about it.

Tabitha Suzuma