Humor Caleb Quotes

#1. There were TVs everywhere. When we weren't on stage, we were watching what America was watching and rooting for each other and our leading lady. That experience was incredible, and I was just enjoying myself.

Laura Benanti

#2. There are two tests in life, more important than any other test. On Monday morning, when you wake up, do you feel in the pit of your stomach you can't wait to go to work? And when you're ready to go home Friday afternoon, do you say, 'I can't wait to go home?'

Chuck Schumer

#3. That's what you get when you're stupid.

Caleb Eversole

#4. Being told when to shit, shower, shave, eat, and sleep isn't my idea of paradise. But then again, Paradise, where i grew up, wasn't paradise either. I'm wondering if paradise is just some word in the dictionary with the definition: this doesn't fucking exist.
Caleb to himself

Simone Elkeles

#5. Expect not praise without envy until you are dead.

Charles Caleb Colton

#6. Sierra, it's Christmastime. Put a stupid mistletoe over his head and kiss him already!

Jay Asher

#7. I lean back. "What the hell are you doing?"
"What do you mean?" she asks, innocently batting her eyelashes against the hot sun beaming down on us.
Is she kidding me?
"Where's you toungue?" I ask stupidly.
Her wet little eyebrows furrow. "In my mouth. Why, where's it supposed to be?

Simone Elkeles

#8. You want him to walk?" Caleb demands. "Are you insane?"
"Did I shoot him in the leg?" I say. "No. He walks. Where do we go, Peter?

Veronica Roth

#9. Just know I am
Not there to catch you
But I am there for you

Caleb Warta

#10. Two wrongs don't make a right, but two lefts do make a U-Turn

Caleb Eversole

#11. A mantra is like meeting the Buddha or Bodhisattva himself.

Dzigar Kongtrul Rinpoche

#12. Depression is the aftermath of credit expansion.

Ludwig Von Mises

#13. They say that if you're good at something, never do it for free. But who would pay me to make bad jokes?

Caleb Eversole

#14. She Snores," said Siku, looking at me. "You better get earplugs. That kind of thing runs in the family."

I opened my mouth, glancing at Caleb, whose eyes got wide in disbelief. Had Siku made a joke? I was too dumbfounded to reply.

Nina Berry

#15. The tightrope of love swings back and forth, forever tied between the tree of anxiety and the tree of fear. Like life, it holds a constant reminder that death must be overcome ...

Goliarda Sapienza

#16. A million dollars? A bit much don't you think?"
"Fuck you."
Caleb smiled, the self indulgent little shit. "My apologies," he mocked with a slight forward bow, "What I meant to say is: no pussy's that good. Though yours does come close.

C.J. Roberts

#17. Just eat some chex mix and have a glass of milk and you'll be fine.

Caleb Eversole

#18. Hey!" Caleb snapped as he realized Nick was about to lock him on the outside with their attackers. He pushed the door open and glared at him. "No man left behind."
Nick scoffed. "This aint' the army, boy. It's every man for himself. Fall behind. Get eaten

Sherrilyn Kenyon

#19. So, that's it? You think I'm just some idiot that fell for your bullshit! Well you're wrong! I fell in love with you, Caleb. I fell in love with your sick sense of humor. I fell in love with the way you protected me. You saved my life! - Livvie/Kitten

C.J. Roberts

#20. It doesn't matter what clothes you had or what shoes you had, or how cool you were, or how many Facebook friends you garnered, what will matter in the end is what weapons you had, how many zombies you killed, and how long you survived.

Caleb Eversole

#21. Physicians must discover the weaknesses of the human mind, and even condescend to humor them, or they will never be called in to cure the infirmities of the body.

Charles Caleb Colton

#22. Witches didn't have leaders, of course, but everyone knew that Granny Weatherwax had been the best leader they didn't have, so now someone else would need to step forward to generally steer the witches.

Terry Pratchett

#23. I guess he found a new lover." Jake Thompson

Bella Jeanisse

#24. Remind me why I'm doing this again?" I whispered back.
"For your real friends, of course: Me, Caleb, and Chad."
"That's sweet of you to say, but I'm not sure we're all friends. Mr. Darcy over here," I indicated Caleb with a nod, "finds me barely tolerable.

Amy Helmes

#25. Like a turnip such a head could be blown away very easily. For where a man was weak, a woman has unmanned him. It would be a mercy to blow such a man away.

Joyce Carol Oates

#26. I don't know anything!' Tim(Caleb) wailed.
He'd never spoken a truer word in his life.

Anthony Horowitz

#27. Yes, sir. But unless Caleb gets frisky with the stove, I'm not anticipating any problems. Nick

Sherrilyn Kenyon

#28. Teaching was the most rigorous form of learning.

Kim Stanley Robinson