Hilariously Bad Quotes

#1. The Soviet Union at this time was being run by the Communists, a group of men fierce in their dedication to wearing hilariously bad suits. Their leader was Josef Stalin (Russian for "Joey Bananas")

Dave Barry

#2. I don't care for sex. I find it an embarrassing, dull exercise. I prefer sports, where you can win.

Norm MacDonald

#3. I couldn't see what was real until time had washed away everything else.

Shannon Hale

#4. Twinkies are more natural than most TV-interview shows.

Douglas Coupland

#5. My father said it was a delightfully odd - and dangerously self-destructive - quirk of humans that we were far more interested in pointless trivia then in genuine news stories.

Jasper Fforde

#6. History is made up of people recovering from the last disaster,

James S.A. Corey

#7. When I travel on an airplane, I like to be served TWA milk and TWA coffee. But I love to be served TWA tea.

Richard Lederer

#8. It's hard to believe that this is how it's done. That this is how we get here into the world, by accident or design, the microscopic pieces of ourselves borne by fluids and blood and growing into a tiny kingdom of cells inside someone else's body It seems so difficult to become alive. So improbable.

Dan Chaon

#9. Rock & Roll is the physical thing that just comes out of you .. the other stuff you have to sit down and learn .. once you learn scales and chord progressions, you can make up your own versions

Brian Setzer

#10. Houses don't clean themselves, she'd mutter. Sometimes she cleaned the bits she had just cleaned. It wasn't like living in a house, but more a question hovering over the surfaces.

Rachel Joyce