Funny Apocalypse Quotes

#1. stillborn love notes provide small satisfaction

Jerome Charyn

#2. IN MY DEFENSE, I didn't mean to start the Apocalypse. It wasn't just my personal aversion to oblivion; I had a clear financial motive: The end of the world is bad for business.

J.C. Nelson

#3. Edward shot a glare at Davis that held the promise of dismemberment, mayhem, and the apocalypse.

Elizabeth Hoyt

#4. That's what gets converts these days," Baron said. "It's a buyers' market in apocalypse. What's hot in heresy's Armageddon.

China Mieville

#5. Ali was a lucky, lucky girl having those two big hot men at her disposal. Not that Roslyn wasn't content with her one surly man, but still ... two. Some people were enjoying their apocalypse a little too much.

Kylie Scott

#6. People don't know when they are happy. They're never so unhappy as they think they are.

Marcel Proust

#7. This guy is funny. But is he safe? And how much is that worth when the world itself has ceased to exist?

Isabella Olivia Ellis

#8. No," I agreed. "The zombie apocalypse is still a few years off, right?"
"That's up to you to decide. Tell you what, we'll do it for fun someday when you're really bored.

Cait Reynolds

#9. I never intended to become a zombie huntress; I had only intended to protest prom, high school's last bastion of patriarchal society.

G.G. Silverman

#10. The rulers of the state are the only persons who ought to have the privilege of lying, either at home or abroad; they may be allowed to lie for the good of the state.

Plato

#11. A lot of people get so hung up on what they can't have that they don't think for a second about whether they really want it.

Lionel Shriver

#12. What else would they be?"
"No idea." Arik shrugged ... "Aliens, mabye?"
"Aliens." Thanatos's voice was flat, disbelieving.
"Your scepticism is funny, coming from one of the Four fucking Horsemen of the Apocalypse.

Larissa Ione

#13. Dee loves it here. Before you came, she spent most of her days here."
To Daemon, my arrival was the beginning of the end. The apocalypse. Kat-mageddon. "You know, I'm not going to get your sister in trouble."
"We'll see.

Jennifer L. Armentrout

#14. It's funny: when I set out to create the world of 'California,' I didn't give the type of apocalypse much thought ... I simply set my two characters, Cal and Frida, in a depleted world and moved through it intuitively.

Edan Lepucki

#15. I've got a couple of bands that I'm working on. The one I'm really excited about, we're called London The Child. It's folky music and it's really cool.

Samuel Larsen

#16. Why is it beautiful that humanity keeps coming back? So does herpes.

Isaac Marion

#17. Maruman does not loll.

Isobelle Carmody

#18. ... sentiments which Feliks had already come to recognise as being characteristic of The Times, which would have described the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse as strong rulers who could do nothing but good for the stability of the international situation.

Ken Follett

#19. They fucked until she was nothing more than a tremor in his arms.

Roberto Bolano

#20. You like the girl," Alasdair offered.
Nassar leveled a heavy gaze at him.
"Lillian said you tried to be funny in the car. I told her it couldn't possibly be true. The moment you try to make a joke, the sky shall split and the Four Horsemen will ride out, heralding Apocalypse.

Ilona Andrews