Bob's Your Uncle Quotes

#1. Yes, happiness is dependent upon misery. For we all feel a swell of happiness after our circumstances improve from a misery recently suffered.

Richelle E. Goodrich

#2. Nothing puzzles me more than the time and space; and yet nothing troubles me less.

Charles Lamb

#3. People that keep stiff upper lips find that it's hard to smile.

Judith Guest

#4. You're saying,' he said, weighing each word, 'that we should send Carrot away to be a duck among humans because Bjorn Stronginthearm is my uncle.

Terry Pratchett

#5. Life is a cycle, a great wheel that turns throughout time: we are born, we live, we die, and (if we are lucky) we are reborn

Robyn Bachar

#6. No more pharmaceuticals. No more certainty of surviving a scratch on one's hand, a cut on a finger while chopping vegetables for dinner, a dog bite.

Emily St. John Mandel

#7. Uncle fought in Vietnam and then he fought a war all by himself.

Bob Dylan

#8. Uncle Bob - "
"I could order you to."
"Well, you'd best be ordering your coffin at the same time."
"I mean it, Charley."
"I suggest a nice mahogany.

Darynda Jones

#9. Where have you been?"
I stepped into my apartment and met Uncle Bob's glare with one of my own. "Out trying to pass myself off as a movie producer to get hot guys to sleep with me. Where have you been?

Darynda Jones

#10. Uncle Bob answered, his tone brusque. "What have you got?"
"Besides great boobs?" I asked.
"On the case."
He was so testy.

Darynda Jones

#11. Garrett must have sensed I was awake. "Hey Detective," he said to Uncle Bob, who was now trudging across the grating toward us. "I think we're losing her. I have no choice but to perform mouth-to-mouth."
"Don't you dare," I said, my lids still in lockdown.

Darynda Jones

#12. Oooh, if you have never been to Alaska, go there while it is still wild. My favorite uncle asked me if I wanted to go there, Uncle Sam. He said if you don't go, you're going to jail. That is how Uncle Sam asks you.

Bob Ross

#13. My uncle Bob sees the whole world in a fun-house mirror, TRUST NO ONE lipsticked luridly across its bowed face.

Karen Joy Fowler

#14. I had to promise to look him up if I was ever in the City of Angels." She winked to Uncle Bob. "He liked my voice." "Mom," Amber said, utterly appalled. "You used your feminine wiles on a man you don't even know." Cookie smiled. "That's what they're for, honey. Eat your salad.

Darynda Jones

#15. Does Uncle Bob have anything?"
"I heard he has an STD."
"I mean on the women."
"Oh, I have no idea if they have any STDs.

Darynda Jones

#16. The reason why time plays a great part in so many of my tales is that this element looms up in my mind as the most profoundly dramatic and grimly terrible thing in the universe.

H.P. Lovecraft

#17. The only thing that lasts longer than a friend's love is the stupidity that keeps us from knowing any better.

R. K. Milholland

#18. When Uncle Bob (or Ted or Ray) promised to send a shooting star over the house to mark a young listener's birthday, the young listener, who had hung out the window for an hour without seeing the star, questioned not Uncle Bob (or Ted or Ray), but his own eyesight.

Vincent Canby

#19. dead guys?" "No," I said, watching Dad and Uncle Bob

Darynda Jones

#20. The mission or ministry of backbiters is to bite you at the back. When they backbite you, move forward. If you turn back to talk back or fight them, you descend to their low class.

Ifeanyi Enoch Onuoha

#21. There isn't a single American city, in my estimation, that has sufficient plans for a nuclear terrorist event.

Irwin Redlener

#22. Did y'all arrest Uncle Bob's turkey? It was just criminal what he did to that bird, wasn't it? You

Kwame Alexander