Best Cruise Quotes

#1. One of my first jobs was on a lesbian cruise. I was the ship comedian for the Lesbian Love Boat.

Margaret Cho

#2. You get to shoot things, and things blow up, and you're jumping off of buildings. It's insane! And hot girls. And you get to dress cool. And you're in a movie with Tom Cruise, come on! So it's a dream come true. Truly.

Josh Holloway

#3. I had a pretty modest upbringing; it was no pleasure cruise. I don't think I would be as happy today if I hadn't been through that. It was tough; I made some bad choices myself.

Vanilla Ice

#4. Normally you're 21 years old and you look like Tom Cruise and you do a couple underwear commercials first and then you're a movie star. That didn't happen for me. So it was all quite overwhelming.

Billy Bob Thornton

#5. It's just weird that out of nowhere God said, May the three best-looking guys in Hollywood have babies - Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt and me. It was bizarre that God said, I want to make the planet more beautiful, and I got the call.

Adam Sandler

#6. Cruise director is - I always laugh and say, 'He's the ship's liver,' because almost everything you can think of filters through you at some point.

Willie Aames

#7. Tom Cruise's pre-nup lets him keep his money, the kids and Katie Holmes.

Anthony Jeselnik

#8. Living in London is like being on a luxury cruise liner.

Ma Jian

#9. Here it is about gentlemen of fortune. They lives rough, and they risk swinging, but they eat and drink like fighting-cocks, and when a cruise is done, why, it's hundreds of pounds instead of hundreds of farthings in their pockets.

Robert Louis Stevenson

#10. I told Leonard, in the immortal words of Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible 2, 'I'm going on vacation. If I tell you where I'm going, then it won't be a vacation.'

Shaquille O'Neal

#11. Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes had the baby. He was there for the birth. It would've been nice if he was there for the conception.

Joan Rivers

#12. You can't drown in Fred water if the cruise ship is full of salmon tacos." Sloan

Colleen Hoover

#13. I totally relate to Tom Cruise. He's not crazy, it's just the litany of the mid-life crisis.

Bret Easton Ellis

#14. They feed you, like, eight times a day, which is why cruise people always look like hairless water buffalo wearing sneakers.

Dave Barry

#15. I'm not the best cruise ship crooner. I'm not the best karaoke guy.

Neil Patrick Harris

#16. I was never the best-looking guy; I was never the Tom Cruise-looking guy.

Craig Sheffer

#17. I studied Tom Cruise running in all the Mission Impossibles. I think he's one of the best screen runners.

Ben Stiller

#18. I think it's real easy to look at what's out there and get discouraged. I was never the best-looking guy, I was never the Tom Cruise-looking guy. I think the biggest thing I can say is, 'Don't compare yourself.'

Craig Sheffer