Beer Humour Quotes

#1. If you can make it down to the pub, the pub will make it up to you.

Benny Bellamacina

#2. If water was beer I'd be a teetotaler

Benny Bellamacina

#3. I have tremendous respect for anyone who can control his palate enough to learn not only to drink beer but to enjoy it too.

Eknath Easwaran

#4. Always skip to the pub to enjoy your barley and hops

Benny Bellamacina

#5. Never go for a drink in London's square mile, nobody ever gets a round in.

Benny Bellamacina

#6. When you serve a beer-cock an ear.

John Shirley

#7. All the best pubs are built on a hill, so you can slope in and roll out.

Benny Bellamacina

#8. ... I've a thirst on me I wouldn't sell for half a crown.
- Give it a name, citizen, says Joe.
- Wine of the country, says he.
- What's yours? says Joe.
- Ditto MacAnaspey, says I.
- Three pints, Terry, says Joe. And how's the old heart, citizen? says he.

James Joyce

#9. 1lb beefstak, with
1pt bitter beer
every 6 hours.
1 ten-mile walk every morning.
1 bed at 11 sharp every night.
And don't stuff your head with things you don't understand.

Jerome K. Jerome

#10. Scientists have invented a new strain of cannabis without the high. They celebrated with non-alcoholic beer and furious dry-humping.

Stephen Colbert

#11. On a world where a common table implement is a little device with which you crack the ice that has formed on your drink between drafts, hot beer is a thing you come to appreciate.

Ursula K. Le Guin

#12. What sort of place lets you drive and vote and fuck before it lets you drink a beer?" ~Mark Cooper

Lisa Henry