Beano Cook Quotes

#1. Ron Powlus will win the Heisman two times and be the greatest quarterback in the history of Notre Dame.

Beano Cook

#2. I hate it. I just do. That [artificial turf], local news, the IRS, and hair dryers are the four worst inventions of the century.

Beano Cook

#3. It is the art of mankind to polish the world, and every one who works is scrubbing in some part.

Henry David Thoreau

#4. Dracula and LSU Football are at their best after the sun goes down.

Beano Cook

#5. because of the fact I now have a son and I am raising him to avoid the very person who is supposed to protect us. Who is going to protect me from the person that is supposed to be protecting me?

Zachary Turnage

#6. I will gouge out your eyeballs and skull-fuck you.

Tara Sivec

#7. My first on the bucket list will be a night game at LSU. I don't know if I'm ever going to get there. Of all the things in college sports, that would be No. 1.

Beano Cook

#8. My faith will proclaim it is so - we are never alone.

John Denver

#9. You only have to bat 1.000 in two things-flying and heart transplants. Everything else, you can go four in five.

Beano Cook

#10. The first word you see at the airport is 'terminal'.

Beano Cook

#11. Nebraska sets the standard for how fans should act.

Beano Cook

#12. You'll never have a 16-team playoff in college football. The most that could happen would be four teams in the next century. But after that, I'm dead, so who cares?

Beano Cook

#13. You have to put yourself out there as a writer, you can't play it safe.

Dan Alatorre

#14. Best scene in college football is at LSU on a Saturday night.

Beano Cook