Top 43 Arbinger Quotes
#1. There is a question I have learned to ask myself when I am feeling bothered about others: am I holding myself to the same standard I am demanding of them?
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#2. If I can succeed in saving only a single soul I can be sure that my own will be saved.
Dominic Savio
#3. The American flag has not been planted on foreign soil to acquire more territory but for humanity's sake.
William McKinley
#4. Arizona is in the midst of a fiscal crisis. We've cut school funding. And they pass a bill questioning Obama's citizenship? For real?
Kyrsten Sinema
#5. America would be a better place if leaders would do more long-term thinking.
Wilma Mankiller
#7. When you begin to see others as people,' Ben told me, 'issues related to race, ethnicity, religion, and so on begin to look and feel different. You end up seeing people who have hopes, dreams, fears, and even justifications that resemble your own.
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#8. But like many who are lonely, I was more preoccupied with others than were those who lived to socialize...Everyone I hated was always with me, even when I was alone. They had to be, for I had to remember what and why I hated in order to remind myself to stay away from them.
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#9. My mum was a children's librarian, so I spent a lot of time in the library. My reading life, because of my mum's work, was evenly split between American, Canadian, Australian and British authors.
Eleanor Catton
#11. Have you ever been in a conflict with someone who thought he was wrong. If you are not wrong, then you will be willing to consider how you might be mistaken.
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#12. Well, I love having kids. But I have the advantage of having a lot of help, a real hands-on husband and small children whom I can easily manipulate.
Jane Kaczmarek
#13. ...whenever i dehumanize another, I necessarily dehumanize all that is human---including myself.
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#14. My disability was my justification! It was my excuse for failing to engage with the world.
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#15. And if happiness should surprise you again, do not mention its previous betrayal.
Enter into the happiness, and burst.
Mahmoud Darwish
#16. The chief thing is to make children feel good about themselves. They want to step into the shoes of a hero who is bigger and stronger, to face tremendous dangers and come home safely for tea.
Geraldine McCaughrean
#17. ...when I betray myself, others' faults become immediately inflated in my heart and mind. I begin to 'horribilize' others. That is, I begin to make them out to be worse than they really are. And I do this because the worse they are, the more justified I feel.
The Arbinger Institute
#19. Most wars between individuals are of the 'cold' rather than the 'hot' variety---lingering resentment, for example, grudges long held, resources clutched rather than shared, help not offered. These are the acts of war that most threaten our homes and workplaces.
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#20. ...no conflict can be solved so long as all parties are convinced they are right. Solution is possible only when at least one party begins to consider how he might be wrong.
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#21. That I am responsible for how I have been feeling, not only for what I have been doing.
The Arbinger Institute
#23. As painful as it is to receive contempt from another, it is more debilitating by far to be filled with contempt for another.
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#26. If we have deep problems, it's because we are failing at the deepest part of the solution. And when we fail at this deepest level, we invite our own failure.
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#27. My charity is in the business of helping firefighters in any way that we can. For instance, after 9/11 we were the second-fastest charity to raise and distribute money to the widows and surviving family members of the 343 firefighters who died that day.
Denis Leary
#28. Am I as vigilant in demanding the eradication of my own bigotry as I am in demanding the eradication of theirs?
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#29. We must find our duties in what comes to us, not in what we imagine might have been.
George Eliot
#30. Because most who are trying to put an end to injustice only think of the injustices they believe they themselves have suffered. Which means that they are concerned not really with injustice but with themselves. They hide their focus on themselves behind the righteousness of their outward cause.
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#32. But none of that is possible," he continued, "if my heart is at war. A heart at war needs enemies to justify its warring. It needs enemies and mistreatment more than it wants peace.
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#33. O come ye in peace here, or come ye in war,
Or to dance at our bridal, young Lord Lochinvar?
Walter Scott
#34. the way we can know if we've betrayed ourselves is by whether we are still desiring to be helpful.
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#35. Housing has led our nation's economic expansion over the past few years, accounting for 16 percent of our Gross Domestic Product. New housing starts and home sales hit record levels from 2003 through 2005.
Randy Neugebauer
#36. People whose hearts are at war toward others can't consider others' objections and challenges enough to be able to find a way through them.
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#37. Averages don't always reveal the most telling realities. You know, Shaquille O'Neal and I have an average height of 6 feet.
Robert Reich
#39. Because if you are the mess, you can clean it. Improvement doesn't depend on others.
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#40. morning dose to run effectively and at full speed. This is
Kavita Devgan
#41. In every moment...we choose to see others either as people like ourselves or as objects. They either count like we do or they don't.
The Arbinger Institute
#42. If you see people of a particular race or culture as objects, your view of them is racist, whatever your color or lack of color or you power or lack of power.
The Arbinger Institute
#43. Whenever we are in the box, we have a need that is met by others' poor behavior. And so our boxes encourage more poor behavior in others, even if that behavior makes our lives more difficult.
The Arbinger Institute
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