Top 33 Craig Benzine Quotes
#1. Blanket statements are always stupid. NO EXCEPTIONS!
Craig Benzine
#2. The only good excuse for not succeeding is DEATH! Unless you're trying to be a ghost. Then it's LIFE!
Craig Benzine
#4. At one time or another, farts have coincided with every other sound, including this quote.
Craig Benzine
#6. Don't put clothes on food. It's supposed to be naked.
Craig Benzine
#7. This quote will self-destruct in ... 4 ... 3 ... 2 ... 1 ... Just kidding ... Or am I?
Craig Benzine
#9. It's better to have a broken CD player that worked once than to never have evolved into a self-aware carbon based lifeform.
Craig Benzine
#11. Failure is not an option. It just happens all the time. Like, all the time.
Craig Benzine
#12. Never put a foot down in the middle of a foot rub.
Craig Benzine
#13. Everything is optional.
Somethings are illegal.
And some things are really gross.
Craig Benzine
#14. Visiting Saturn sounds like a lot of fun but you will die!
Craig Benzine
#15. It's better to have won & lost than to have won, stopped trying, & descended into alcoholism.
Craig Benzine
#18. The coffee's done? I LOVE IT WHEN THE COFFEE'S DONE!
Craig Benzine
#19. Time travel is awesome ... And useful. That sentence had a typo when I typed it ... The first time.
Craig Benzine
#20. Saving time is so important that I'm not even going to finish this sen-it's lunchtime already? Yum yum.
Craig Benzine
#21. Based on this one experience I had, jumping to conclusions is always really stupid.
Craig Benzine
#22. Sure relationships can be fun at first, but then you get to know each others quirks, and those quirks become quarks, and those quarks combine and become hadrons and scientists love to combine hadrons in giant hadron colliders and they create black holes!
Craig Benzine
#23. I would hate to be a bee. Be surrounded by bees all the time.
Craig Benzine
#26. Theres nothing to fear but
fears themselves, such as monsters,
rejection, food poisoning, redundancy,
monsters, and oxford commas.
Craig Benzine
#27. Things that don't exist do exist, they're just really fast.
Craig Benzine
#28. Nothing is perfect. Therefore, being perfect is being nothing ... and that's a great way to lose weight.
Craig Benzine
#29. The grass is always greener when it's covered in money.
Craig Benzine
#30. I'd choose truth over cake but I'd try to find a way to get both to be honest.
Craig Benzine
#31. The good thing about living like me is everywhere you go is a step up.
Craig Benzine
#32. Be cautious of bears at all times, even when being mauled by a tiger.
Craig Benzine
#33. Cars and bumper cars are two very different things. NEVER sleep in a bumper car.
Craig Benzine
Famous Authors
Popular Topics
Scroll to Top