Andy Richter Quotes

#1. I briefly considered doing Edgar Allan Poe and just swearing a lot.

Andy Richter

#2. If somebody's looking at pictures of naked people and you go, 'Oh I don't want to see that,' you're lying. Cause naked people are always interesting. Always. Whether they're beautiful, or naked or 500 pounds.

Andy Richter

#3. No, I don't know any Emily Dickinson poems!

Andy Richter

#4. The basic equation that mystified me as a young man was looking at guys who could actually get girls. I was always amazed, because they never seemed to care. I was like, 'How do they do that?'

Andy Richter

#5. But I don't read a lot of fiction. I prefer the nonfiction stuff.

Andy Richter

#6. I mean, I'll say the filthiest things in the world, but when it comes down to it, I'm kind of a prude.

Andy Richter

#7. I wouldn't want to be a talk show host. That's another awkward compliment people make. 'You should have your own talk show.' And I think, no thank you.

Andy Richter

#8. One of the big tensions in my life is that I have known the stresses of financial hardship since I was a little kid, and it is the cancer for which I am seeking a cure.

Andy Richter

#9. My ability to notice that kind of thing, the sanctity of the bubble that you create, has not been so good in a way, in that I notice it concurrently with actually doing the thing. I always notice it in retrospect.

Andy Richter

#10. I've always tried to be nice to people, so that sort of translates into popularity, I guess.

Andy Richter

#11. If you start to just aim for what the audience wants to hear, you're already hamstrung because you don't have any freedom.

Andy Richter

#12. Tell me what you want, and then I'll put in what I want ... after I'm done with my codependent providing for you, I'll get a little for me too.

Andy Richter

#13. Well, I refer to 'Celebrity Jeopardy ' as the short-bus 'Jeopardy,' because it is a lot easier. Like, there was a whole column basically naming stores in New York.

Andy Richter

#14. I'm not that professional.

Andy Richter

#15. I never just sit down and see what's on TV anymore. And also, I hate almost everything, so that keeps you reading magazines and doing crossword puzzles or whatever.

Andy Richter

#16. I actually find something rewarding about that tension between satisfying myself and satisfying others. Because first of all, I can't provide my own structure, and that tension provides a structure for me to actually work within.

Andy Richter

#17. Because homecoming came first, and there was the homecoming court. The five guys on homecoming court were disqualified from being in the prom court. So being prom king was being sixth most popular.

Andy Richter

#18. Some people are born with a brain that has this weird, magical mathematical thing that makes them an amazing jazz musician.

Andy Richter

#19. We've been swimming at nude beaches and I love to go skinny dipping, but I'm sorry, sitting on top of a mountain, that's just, you're trying to show off or something. That's ridiculous.

Andy Richter

#20. I want to get back and figure out how we're going to make 'The Tonight Show' funny and good.

Andy Richter

#21. There are naked people in boots on a mountain top firing guns.

Andy Richter

#22. Anything that I read, I read because I'm interested in it.

Andy Richter

#23. The thing that's important for me to focus on is the balancing of the tension between satisfying myself and satisfying an audience, and making something that I think is good and funny, worthwhile, small-"i" important, versus something that's going to do well.

Andy Richter

#24. It's a very nice thing to have a baby.

Andy Richter

#25. I was prom king. Which is actually saying I was the sixth most popular, because the five who were on homecoming were automatically disqualified from prom, so of course I have to look at it that way.

Andy Richter

#26. Since she got a cause and stopped being funny. I think she's real funny, but lately it's all been hearts and flowers and tears and saving teenagers and creating a role model. And that ain't funny. No giggles there.

Andy Richter

#27. I watch mediocre shows that have been on for three or four seasons, and feel angry at them.

Andy Richter

#28. I have a wife and child, and I guess that would constitute a family, and sometimes I watch shows where the people aren't related. And I don't get nervous, get the sweats, and have to run out of the room. I mean, I can handle it.

Andy Richter

#29. I think the people that are best at something, they don't think about it much. That's the whole key to being good at anything.

Andy Richter

#30. At a very basic level, I think television exists for game shows, and I think it always will.

Andy Richter

#31. The people on 'Quintuplets' were great, but I wasn't a producer on that show, and it wasn't exactly my taste.

Andy Richter